I'm so alone.

[fromlonelytogreat]

What do YOU do when you're alone on the weekend?

 

This isn't a rhetorical question, as I really want you to respond!!

 

 

Human interaction is an essential need for having a healthy life.

 

I am sick of this **** really. I know that it's all my fault and that it's the person that I am (well, was) that has bought me to this kind of existence. I wish that I was the person that I am now, but back six years ago.

 

I spent last night thinking about a group of people from my uni that I met up with in September. We were supposed to have another gathering last month, but that never eventuated. There are a couple of possible scenarios. However, being me, I think that they just don't want to see me anymore. That does make sense, seeing that I'm not a student anymore. I mean, what kind of person would want to go and hang out with uni people if they had already finished? That does make me feel like ****, but is probably the harsh reality of it all. I am an outsider and that is my downfall.

 

The undergraduate degree students of my faculty have heaps of social gatherings and there are some coming up after exams (end of exams party, and graduation dinner), and I really want to go, but the fact that I will have to go alone is a big turnoff and will make me feel loser-ish. I just look at their facebook group and see the majority of their profile pictures and see how much fun they all have socially and it just makes me feel like ****.

 

I set up a facebook group for Master students of the faculty, but no one joined.

 

I am probably also silly to think that I could ever make any strong connections with anyone from the internet. I am not going to lie. I waste a lot of time trying to find people like me to meet, and the overall consensus is that it doesn't work. People already have their own established friendship groups, why would they want to be around someone who is an outsider?

[pandagirl]

Hey! Stop being so down on yourself! You keep on saying things like "why would anyone want to hang out with someone like me"? Which is, exactly, why you are having problems finding friends.

 

You are full of great qualities and you have to start believing in them. Only then will you attract people to you and make friends.

 

Making connections for ANYONE is difficult. But first, you gotta work on that self-confidence.

[Suiyobi]

@ fromlonelytogreat: Surely you have some close friends, even if it's just one or two. And you know what? That's better than being Mr./Ms. Popular. Can you just imagine how stressful it is to break down your hang-out times with so many people? Personally, I only have about eight true friends and it's already difficult as it is to spend some equal time with them and balance it out with my personal time.

 

Really, there's no need to be so hard on yourself. You consider yourself an outsider a lot but you can use that to your advantage. People can sometimes grow tired of meeting their old-established clique, so if you make the effort to meet someone new, that person will view you as a "breathe of fresh air". Play your cards right and before you know it you've made a new friend.

[Green]

your obviously depressed and since I'm feeling a little down today I'm enjoying the company but really You need to live in the present stop feeling sorry for yourself and think of yourself as the hero of the story once again. go on some adventure talk to people... don't use the internet as a crutch and don't comiserate over lost oportunities unless your having fun doing it

[monkey00]

First off, don't allow your self-worth be determined by whether or not people want to hang out with you.

 

Second off, scrap facebook..it's useless. One of the most useless online social networking tools.

 

Third off, listen to Sinkingship that's good advice and it's on spot.

 

When I was younger I royally sucked at making friends due to my shyness, often I would make/meet other people through friends. Now things are the opposite and I make friends even though I don't go to college anymore. People gravitate to you if they see you're having a good time with or without others, confident, successful, and most of all friendly.

 

Be an optimist, not a pessimist. Relationships nowadays are thin and thick, make it happen for yourself.

[Brimstone_Angel]

What do YOU do when you're alone on the weekend?

 

I spend it at home looking at or listening to t.v., music, and doing something on the computer. I might call a family member or one of my two long distant friends. And I'll mess with my best friend, Tiger, he's my cat.

[Brimstone_Angel]

Panda and Monkey, I have a question for you. How many friends do you have? How many times have you hanged out with them? What do you do on your weekends? If you are on a public email sight like Facebook, how many people do you have on it? If you are on a dating site, how many hits do you get?

 

Sometimes our self-worth IS determined in part as to who our friends and family are. We need these people in our lives because they play a role into the people we are. This is why we should be careful by who we keep in our circle of closeness.

 

It is easy to say that his attitude is what is keeping others away from him, but do you truly know what he does? But, I feel like he does. He sounds like he is struggling with something that comes from how he was treated long ago by cruel people/children. I remember growing up being bullied, teased, and tormented by others, because I was poorer than them, did not dress in the same styles as they do.

 

I have a MySpace page and a Facebook page. I have probably six people on each. And even then, they are rarely on. I have been on like 5 or so different dating sites for YEARS, and have only had ONE hit.

 

My dating life has been practically none existant, not from lack of trying, but for lack of women willing to date me. My two closest friends live in different states and I have not made any friends since coming home from the service.

 

So, yeah, I can get where he is coming from and it is not all his fault. Sometimes life is not fair unto certain people. We may be the most friendliest people around, but due to lack of interests from others, we have learned to be shy and make it hard for us to deal with others. It is something that we have learned from others. And it is going to take others to help us unlearn this behavior.

 

To me I am friends to anyone who wants or needs one. It does not matter if they are all woohoo! life or if they are shy and mellow. It is about reaching out to others, not because they fit your profile, but because they are another living being.

[monkey00]

Panda and Monkey, I have a question for you. How many friends do you have? How many times have you hanged out with them? What do you do on your weekends? If you are on a public email sight like Facebook, how many people do you have on it? If you are on a dating site, how many hits do you get?

 

To be honest, I don't have a lot of friends. Quality is more important to me than quantity. I'd say I have about 2-6 friends I might hang out with on a regular basis. In terms of people and friends I've made over the years it would be around 50 people I have on facebook, which rarely I ever speak to...so that's mostly useless. On weekends I might be biking, visiting family, out with friends, chores/laundry...though I should sign up for a class one of these days.

 

Sometimes our self-worth IS determined in part as to who our friends and family are. We need these people in our lives because they play a role into the people we are. This is why we should be careful by who we keep in our circle of closeness.

 

I agree, our existence is best defined by the people who know us best. We wouldn't be here today with out them and people we've met over the years, our old bosses, the panhandler in the street, the bully...and all our sum experiences.

 

It is easy to say that his attitude is what is keeping others away from him, but do you truly know what he does? But, I feel like he does. He sounds like he is struggling with something that comes from how he was treated long ago by cruel people/children. I remember growing up being bullied, teased, and tormented by others, because I was poorer than them, did not dress in the same styles as they do.

 

Hey I didn't have a picture perfect childhood either. I was bullied and picked on throughout my childhood school years. I was also an outcast and had few reliable friends in HS. No offense but it's a very poor excuse if you're going to use your childhood to play the victim card here.

 

I have a MySpace page and a Facebook page. I have probably six people on each. And even then, they are rarely on. I have been on like 5 or so different dating sites for YEARS, and have only had ONE hit.

I know people who have 200 - 500 friends on facebook, it's all so meaningless unless you can call them your true friends.

Why resort to only online dating? It's a numbers game and online dating is the worst place to start. You'd have to message 100 girls to get back a couple of replies.

 

My dating life has been practically none existant, not from lack of trying, but for lack of women willing to date me. My two closest friends live in different states and I have not made any friends since coming home from the service.

 

So, yeah, I can get where he is coming from and it is not all his fault. Sometimes life is not fair unto certain people. We may be the most friendliest people around, but due to lack of interests from others, we have learned to be shy and make it hard for us to deal with others. It is something that we have learned from others. And it is going to take others to help us unlearn this behavior.

 

To me I am friends to anyone who wants or needs one. It does not matter if they are all woohoo! life or if they are shy and mellow. It is about reaching out to others, not because they fit your profile, but because they are another living being.

 

You only get back as much as you put into life. You say you've learned to be shy, then unlearn that. Everyone is capable of change as long as you stay open-minded and get out of your comfort zone. Change comes from within, no one is able to do it for you no matter how much they reach out to you.