fromlonelytogreat Posted November 17, 2008 Share Posted November 17, 2008 Outside of work I am so lonely and that fact makes me really sad. I NEVER meet any girls outside of work. I also have a phobia of initiating conversation around new people. I am so pathetic. Things that 'normal' people take for granted are just so hard for me to do - ie. greeting someone, or saying their name. Being this lonely just makes me want to cry. I can't just keep on living like this. I can be funny when I am comfortable, and at work I go between the two extremes. Some of the people probably think I'm a snob. Sometimes I ask myself why I bother going to the gym, or making sure that I look good before going to work. Nobody bloody notices. How can lonely people such as myself meet women? Link to post Share on other sites
Nikki Sahagin Posted November 17, 2008 Share Posted November 17, 2008 Okay I think you need to focus not on meeting women but on meeting people. Small steps lead to great leaps. If you jump straight out there and are disapointed by a woman it will probably push you right back to loneliness and then some. You sound cripplingly shy or maybe anxious? Might you have an anxiety disorder or are you just very socially self-conscious? Do you have any friends you could arrange a night out with? Any birthdays or events coming up? You could then meet up with friends and get introduced to their friends and it will go from there. Remember a social life builds up, you don't just have one there at your disposal. It will take some time. And don't give up on the gym. It's a good outlet for stress, might lead to meeting people and will do well for your self-esteem. Link to post Share on other sites
2sure Posted November 17, 2008 Share Posted November 17, 2008 Your ID name says it all. You want to improve specific things and you do have hope. In the US there is a group called Toast Masters. I know it sounds corny, but stay with me a second. More people than admit it, and many that I know...have participated in this group. They say they have used it to get practice speaking publicly, used it to network, for professional reasons. But really it is for shy people, to help them get over that hurdle. Whatever the reason for your shyness - practice in public speaking can give you the confidence to literally, be noticed. That confidence has a ripple affect. Just take a quick look at this group. Link to post Share on other sites
casanovacorner Posted November 17, 2008 Share Posted November 17, 2008 In the US there is a group called Toast Masters. I know it sounds corny, but stay with me a second. More people than admit it, and many that I know...have participated in this group. They say they have used it to get practice speaking publicly, used it to network, for professional reasons. But really it is for shy people, to help them get over that hurdle. Whatever the reason for your shyness - practice in public speaking can give you the confidence to literally, be noticed. That confidence has a ripple affect. Just take a quick look at this group. I was just going to suggest this when I saw your post. Toastmasters is great. I also took a college Communications course as a required class. I went to University of Phoenix, and their entire program is based on working in groups. That's with every class. I'm not sure where you're from, but a communication class may be what you need. It forces you to stand up in front of people and talk. I loved it, and that's where I first learned about Toastmasters. Look it up and see if you have something similar where you live. Link to post Share on other sites
Author fromlonelytogreat Posted November 18, 2008 Author Share Posted November 18, 2008 Okay, where can I meet people around my age? Link to post Share on other sites
windows Posted November 19, 2008 Share Posted November 19, 2008 first off; whats your age? Link to post Share on other sites
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