I had to push her away forever...

[foxh1234]

Hi guys, you are all doing the right things. Keep NC and time will take care of it. It has been over 8 months for me since the break up and I feel so much better. It stings for sure from time to time but that just shows me how much I can care for someone. Hang in there guys and keep posting. Surfer Dude, I really enjoy reading your posts, keep them coming.

[Surfer Dude]

I've been feeling great today. It's been almost 3 months since the breakup, and 6 days since goodbye forever email and start of our eternal NC.

 

The thought I'm never going to see her or hear from her again isn't so disturbing anymore. I've fully accepted it, knowing it can only benefit me. Am I disappointed in how everything ended? Yes, I most definitely am. Am I sad or grieving over her? Not at all, not anymore. Besides, like someone said here earlier, we just aren't parts of each other's lives anymore, it's not like anyone is dead.

[UnamedSeven]

Way to go, man. What you did, was painful, but you saved yourself from so much more pain, that it was the only thing you could do. She never deserved you and she gave you crap in return to the love you supplied her with. Be strong all the way to the end.

[Surfer Dude]

I had a bit of a relapse today. Half an hour ago I was backing up my hard drive on my other computer and ran into some old chat logs with my ex.

 

Being a fool, I thought I could go and remember the old times a bit. So I opened the damn log and started reading it. What did I do that for...

 

Anyways, I read some really sweet things there. She told me that she is so happy that I'm her fiance. She said she loves me more than anything in the world. We talked about getting loans and buying a house together either in Japan (her home country) or New Zealand. We talked about how we wanted to live our lives.

 

She said that I should never doubt her love for me, that I'm her everything and all she ever wanted. She said so many times she was crying of happiness at night, solely because of the fact that I was her boyfriend and fiance. Said she would be there to make me happy till the end of our natural lives.

 

How did things change so much... why did she leave me for other guys.

Why did my teddy bear dump me and then treat me like scum? ='(

 

I really feel like destroying all pics and chat logs, or at least putting them somewhere where I can't easily access them. I can't afford to have more setbacks. It's difficult as it is. I should really start applying my own advice that I give out so often...

[EmperorR]

I threw awqay all cards and pictures because I couldnn bare them on my property, only pictures I have are on a cd which I'm going to throw away next. It's hard thinkkig your ok, and then you see a picture or a chat log or email filled with lies

[Surfer Dude]

I threw awqay all cards and pictures because I couldnn bare them on my property, only pictures I have are on a cd which I'm going to throw away next. It's hard thinkkig your ok, and then you see a picture or a chat log or email filled with lies

 

I'm in quite a difficult situation here. I spent loads of money on trips with my girlfriend, it cost me a lot to visit her in Japan. I saw those trips as something more than just visiting my ex, it was a very big personal satisfaction for me, because I always wanted to go there anyways.

 

This is where the problem arises. Those are wonderful travel experiences for me, which I like remembering. But since I was spending 95% of my time there with my ex, it's really difficult for me to separate memories of romance from memories of trips and vacations, since they're essentially the same thing.

 

Deleting those pics would be throwing away all the money I ever spent traveling there, which is something I can't really do. At the same time, even if it's just some pic (without my ex in it), it causes me to remember wonderful times and I start having setbacks.

 

I'm thinking I'll probably put them somewhere inaccessible and try to enjoy what I have in my head. Tough situation.

 

Of course, I will throw away her letters, cards and gifts. I've already deleted 1500 of her emails.

[UnamedSeven]

I had a bit of a relapse today. Half an hour ago I was backing up my hard drive on my other computer and ran into some old chat logs with my ex.

 

Being a fool, I thought I could go and remember the old times a bit. So I opened the damn log and started reading it. What did I do that for...

 

Anyways, I read some really sweet things there. She told me that she is so happy that I'm her fiance. She said she loves me more than anything in the world. We talked about getting loans and buying a house together either in Japan (her home country) or New Zealand. We talked about how we wanted to live our lives.

 

She said that I should never doubt her love for me, that I'm her everything and all she ever wanted. She said so many times she was crying of happiness at night, solely because of the fact that I was her boyfriend and fiance. Said she would be there to make me happy till the end of our natural lives.

 

How did things change so much... why did she leave me for other guys.

Why did my teddy bear dump me and then treat me like scum? ='(

 

I really feel like destroying all pics and chat logs, or at least putting them somewhere where I can't easily access them. I can't afford to have more setbacks. It's difficult as it is. I should really start applying my own advice that I give out so often...

I find that to be true. I feel like such an idiot a lot because i never deleted my ex's number. I always had hope that she would just call me again to apologize. She never did. i just cant get myself to do it. I honestly don't have enough courage to get me to delete her forever in my life.

 

When she broke up with me (via telephone), i ran out of my house and i deleted all of the pics of her and pics of me and her. I ran around basically screaming why?!!!?! with tears flying down my face. I spent 3 hours, outside walking up and down my block, hoping that this would send a signal for help to ANYONE in this world to save me. To tell me it would be alright like my ex would.

 

I shunned everyone away. I was left with nothing except with the 2 friends that i don't even have anymore.

[TeaAbraham]

Same here Surfer Dude.

 

I really cannot separate the trips we took and those experiences I had from her. It is really too bad, but for me those trips are intertwined with her. I wouldn't have taken them without her, and she made them what they were. I don't see the point in keeping those pictures around for the future. They were good times, but remembering them will only allow me to enjoy the present less, and hinder my ability to create new wonderful memories. It will be hard for me to get rid of all those things, but such is the nature of the situation.

 

I don't think deleting those pics would be throwing away money. I go to exotic places and don't take any pics at all, yet I am not throwing away any money. Perhaps I am not using my spent money to the fullest, but I'm just saying there was more to those trips than those pictures. You still have Japan in your mind, you still have those experiences, because those experiences have shaped who you are, so they will always be with you. Those experiences are now a part of you no matter what you do. I wouldn't be afraid of letting go of the tangible things (the pictures). They are the least of it.

 

On the email, letters, gifts topic, I too need to get rid of all of them. In order to do so, however, I must look at them. I am scared of pulling out a letter to throw it away and just happening to read some words within. I can feel the pain already! Perhaps I shall hold off on it.

 

I ran around basically screaming why?!!!?! with tears flying down my face. I spent 3 hours, outside walking up and down my block, hoping that this would send a signal for help to ANYONE in this world to save me. To tell me it would be alright like my ex would.

 

I shunned everyone away. I was left with nothing except with the 2 friends that i don't even have anymore.

Yeah, that night I lost my two best friends, and my whole world of the past 3 years. I too ran outside crying hysterically, fell to my knees in the park, and screamed 'Why?!' in pure anguish to the heavens. Not easy to accept your whole life disintegrating to dust before your own eyes, going from having the two most important people in your world to having no one. The lonliness is a b*tch.

 

But then again, there are far worse things in this world.

[UnamedSeven]

Yeah, that night I lost my two best friends, and my whole world of the past 3 years. I too ran outside crying hysterically, fell to my knees in the park, and screamed 'Why?!' in pure anguish to the heavens. Not easy to accept your whole life disintegrating to dust before your own eyes, going from having the two most important people in your world to having no one. The lonliness is a b*tch.

 

But then again, there are far worse things in this world.

 

Yeah. Thats what one of the two friends' saying. "Could be worse" and i hated him for that because i honestly thought. "No, it really cant be worse". I wish i could go back to the last time i have said that. Which was right before i got my girlfriend. I would give anything, besides my life, for that relationship back. To just hold her, even for one damned minute and tell her that i can accept anything and that i'm willing to adapt to whatever she wants me to be. Idc at all even if she never loved me. She sure as hell, fooled me and it felt real for once and i was proud to say that, yes, i do love this girl to death.

[Surfer Dude]

Yeah. Thats what one of the two friends' saying. "Could be worse" and i hated him for that because i honestly thought. "No, it really cant be worse". I wish i could go back to the last time i have said that. Which was right before i got my girlfriend. I would give anything, besides my life, for that relationship back. To just hold her, even for one damned minute and tell her that i can accept anything and that i'm willing to adapt to whatever she wants me to be. Idc at all even if she never loved me. She sure as hell, fooled me and it felt real for once and i was proud to say that, yes, i do love this girl to death.

 

I doubt you feel love for her. It's more of an emotional attachment that we are all having problems breaking.

 

I'm sure as hell I don't love her after what she has done to me. Why would I love someone who dumped me for another man and then treated me like crap, and even told me "I don't love you. You will never get me, get reality!". I can feel no love for someone like that.

 

However, I still feel the emotional bond and attachment. I miss the memories of good times... that's why it's so difficult letting go completely and forgetting.

 

I keep having major problems and setbacks every morning. I wake up, the first thought in my head is that she's no longer in my life, that our sweet love and friendship is gone forever and that I'm never going to see her again. It takes me some moments to adjust to this every single time I wake up, it really comes as a huge shock every single time.

 

This had stopped happening to me after we had decided to keep this "awkward friendship", but now that she is completely out of my life and we refuse to talk to each other, it feels the same as the first few days of breakup, even though it's been 10 days since the start of our eternal NC. Ah the pain...

[UnamedSeven]

I doubt you feel love for her. It's more of an emotional attachment that we are all having problems breaking.

 

I'm sure as hell I don't love her after what she has done to me. Why would I love someone who dumped me for another man and then treated me like crap, and even told me "I don't love you. You will never get me, get reality!". I can feel no love for someone like that.

 

However, I still feel the emotional bond and attachment. I miss the memories of good times... that's why it's so difficult letting go completely and forgetting.

 

I keep having major problems and setbacks every morning. I wake up, the first thought in my head is that she's no longer in my life, that our sweet love and friendship is gone forever and that I'm never going to see her again. It takes me some moments to adjust to this every single time I wake up, it really comes as a huge shock every single time.

 

This had stopped happening to me after we had decided to keep this "awkward friendship", but now that she is completely out of my life and we refuse to talk to each other, it feels the same as the first few days of breakup, even though it's been 10 days since the start of our eternal NC. Ah the pain...

Yeah.. i have/had similar things happen to me too. Me and my ex, e met through a school play that we were doing this past Summer. This September, this school that was putting on the play, would be my official school for the next 4 years of my life.

 

So, the summer ended and she dumped me for reasons i still don't know. I know, in my heart, i don't love her, but im sure that i would feel a huge attraction towards her, if i EVER see her again in my life. Although, i can never forgive her and how she recked my entire life up until this point. It was because of her, that i blame myself for why i even exist.

 

The first day of this new school, (High School) i was walking and i immediately stopped. The next thing i knew, i had tears on my face. I had just walked by the place in the school where i 1. Asked her out 2. kissed her (my first kiss) and 3. where we always met in secret. All 3 of these things happened in one spot, and i walked by it and just couldn't control myself.

 

It was so unexpected, it was like somebody had just, literally, stabbed me in the back.

 

 

by the way, i would deeply appreciate any insight you may have on my current situation here: http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t171495/

[Surfer Dude]

I really took our relationship seriously, but to her I was obviously just someone to pass time and be with till something better comes along.

 

I'm still coping with breakup, I didn't go on a rebound even though it's been 3 months, while she slept with 3-4 men during these 3 months. She probably doesn't even think of me, and why should she, to her I am probably just one in a row of men she had sexual experiences with. That's the problem. I'm still obsessing over this sh*t 12 hours a day, while she's taking dicks from god knows whom, probably doesn't even remember me after all the new things she experienced. All the things we ever experienced together, I can't really feel good about those memories anymore... They have been stained by her dumping and arrogance towards me.

 

The fact that she went on a f*cking spree with so many men following our breakup, clearly indicates she had no respect for our relationship whatsoever. At least that's how I see it, what do you think? I can't possibly fathom how anyone can just ditch their fiance, not for one person, but to sleep with several and to "enjoy their life" (her words).

 

How could I be so blind not to see what kind of person she really is, before breakup. Is it really possible to see what people are like deep inside, when they're acting totally normal and loving all the time? This is surely not the same girl I met two years ago. Usually people retain some traits even after they've gone through a transformation, but this can't be the same person. As if someone replaced her personality while her body remained the same... I just can't believe this. I feel nothing but pure contempt.

 

How can I ever trust anyone after this, will I ever be able to trust women again?....

[TeaAbraham]

I'm still obsessing over this sh*t 12 hours a day, while she's taking dicks from god knows whom, probably doesn't even remember me after all the new things she experienced. All the things we ever experienced together, I can't really feel good about those memories anymore... They have been stained by her dumping and arrogance towards me.

 

It does really hurt to think about everything she is up to and all the new experiences she is having, while it has taken you all that you've got just to cope with what she has done, and you are constantly plagued by it. I have been trying to think of my ex as a stranger. She really has changed / that little devil inside of her finally came out, and the one I loved is no more. It helps to think of her just as someone I don't know. I don't care how happy anonymous people on the street are. It never made me upset how many men some girl I don't know is having sex with. I really just don't care. And that's what I am trying to do with my ex. I don't know her anymore. She is someone else. The person I loved is dead, and someone else has inhabited her body. I don't care what this other person is up to. She means nothing to me.

 

The fact that she went on a f*cking spree with so many men following our breakup, clearly indicates she had no respect for our relationship whatsoever. At least that's how I see it, what do you think? I can't possibly fathom how anyone can just ditch their fiance, not for one person, but to sleep with several and to "enjoy their life" (her words).

I am sure she had infinite respect for your relationship at one point in time. The way she ended things shows that that had changed, however. I don't know if she could have ended things in a respectable manner granted how her feelings had changed. It would have hurt if she hadn't cheated and had just called it off, perhaps equally so. And you can't really control what she does afterwards, how many men she lets loose with. But knowing that she ended things with this intention is very upsetting. Perhaps if she had ended things not to sleep with other men, but was just alone afterwards, you would feel better. And perhaps you could have been friends and all that BS. But she didn't do it like that, and she went f*cking anyone she could find. So that is definitely less respectful. But once the relationship is over, you can't keep going on respecting the relationship. I guess the thing is she was even disrespecting the relationship while the relationship was still taking place. This isn't really going anywhere, I am just trying to figure this out! I think the crux is that her feeilngs had changed, and she stopped respecting the relationship when that happened. So whatever she would have done you would have felt extremely hurt and betrayed. I would think that in the end it would feel better knowing that person you knew is completely gone, and this other person has been sleeping around. You know for sure that you don't love a woman who is like this. If things were more cordial, perhaps you would still love her even though she doesn't love you? I don't know. Respect is a tricky subject. You can respect somebody and not love them. I don't think she showed any respect for you in any case.

 

Usually people retain some traits even after they've gone through a transformation, but this can't be the same person. As if someone replaced her personality while her body remained the same... I just can't believe this. I feel nothing but pure contempt.

 

How can I ever trust anyone after this, will I ever be able to trust women again?....

 

I ask myself this question too. After that pure, eternal love I felt for her, how can I trust anyone? It's a good question. For me I saw warning signs of her deceitfulness. She always had a part of her that was lying and mean, she just directed those things towards other people, but never to me. So I knew she was capable of these things, and this was one of the reasons I started falling out of love with her. So I guess I could have seen it coming. I just wish I could have been with her and helped her through this lying and dishonesty. People aren't perfect, and I wish I could have helped her work through her problems in this regard.

 

So perhaps there were warning signs for you too? Did she just change as she did overnight? If I saw warning signs again that wouldn't mean I would end the relationship though. I would just take special care to address it.

 

I think you have to give everyone the benefit of the doubt, because not everyone is like your ex. Not everyone would do what she did. There are other loving women out there. YOU would never do what she did; there are people out there who just wouldn't. There are so many other women out there, and not all of them are like your ex. We all have a little devil inside of us, but not every body lets it consume their actions.

 

Don't let this greif over losing her consume you either. She's gone. It's just not worth it.

 

I keep having major problems and setbacks every morning. I wake up, the first thought in my head is that she's no longer in my life, that our sweet love and friendship is gone forever and that I'm never going to see her again. It takes me some moments to adjust to this every single time I wake up, it really comes as a huge shock every single time.

 

This had stopped happening to me after we had decided to keep this "awkward friendship", but now that she is completely out of my life and we refuse to talk to each other, it feels the same as the first few days of breakup, even though it's been 10 days since the start of our eternal NC. Ah the pain...

 

Yea, waking up sucks. Hits you like a freight train. Reminds me of that Belle & Sebastian song: Waking Up to Us. I'll have to post that on the song forum. Really fits your situation though.

 

It was amazing how well I felt during the "awkward friendship" period too. That all disintegrated when I stopped being her little b*tch friend. As hard as it is, I know it's better like this.

 

Here's a quote from this thread by wowIlose:

 

Switch up your perspective a bit. Consider this as dodging the bullet. Had you married her and then seen her true colors it would have been worse because you would need to get divorced. Take it a step further, and imagine you had kids then saw the true colors... wow. See what I mean? Dodged a bullet my friend. Consider yourself lucky as your still young and will find someone better no doubt.

 

It's better like this.

 

Dodged a bullet my friend, dodged a bullet.

[EmperorR]

were all going through the same things it seems, cheated on dumped, did the friends crap before we went total NC, there already with someone new and its like we didn't exist to them, yet we still feel this pain. I know that anything is better than a cheat and all the hurtful things she said and idd to me while I said nothing is something that always lingers at me. I just want to call her now and get everything off my chest how shes a whore, how I did everything for her and she had no respect at all for me. Cheated on me 3 times when she went away on a trip I paid for, I was emailing her and calling her like a fool while the guy she was cheating on me was probably laughing saying what a sucker while hes screwing my ex.

 

I just hate it I did nothing but give my heart opened up, did everything for her and I got tossed like a coffee cup. Did not even get a I'm sorry for cheating on you nothingg, instead I got blamed. While she has someone new to love and hold and talk to, I have nobody. And that what bothers me the most, she knew I gave up all my friends to please her that devil. What's worse this little prick made me see her one more time before she told me the news and she kissed me to:sick:.

[Surfer Dude]

Thanks for your insightful stuff Tea, you are so right about everything. I've also realized that this isn't the sweet girl I used to know, but rather somebody else that took her place. She changed and the old her is never coming back, so I have no choice but to accept this.

 

I also like to think she is someone else's responsibility and problem right now. The poor chump she is dating right now is in for a living hell, and it feels good to know it aint me.

 

As for waking up in the morning, I suppose these things have a way of getting numb as time passes. I have deleted all the remaining chat logs, I have moved the pics to some HDD I never use (but I doubt I'm going to look at them ever again) and on Monday I'm throwing away everything she ever gave me, including a nice watch, expensive sunglasses etc. I don't need to have these object in my closet anymore, they are just a reminder of a girl who doesn't exist anymore.

 

I could either grieve the loss of the girl I once used to know, or accept that she's been replaced by someone else. I choose acceptance.

Anyways, thank you for sharing these insightful opinions, it helps a lot reading all this.

-------

Emperor, it's actually pretty obvious why NC is so necessary. As long as they retain a presence in your life, it's next to impossible to move on. Be it just as friends, acquaintances or whatever. I actually did what you want to do right now (calling names, cursing) and it alleviated some pain, I felt like she was finally getting the treatment she deserved. Too bad she probably showed those emails to her friends and boyfriends, most likely crying and calling me a horrible person This person has no shame really.

 

I actually think she dumped some guy so that she could be with me in the past. I'm not sure who he was (I had nothing to do with it, had no knowledge about the matter whatsoever), as she never talked about it, but I'm positive that someone got dumped. Should've taken that as a first serious red flag. Someone wise once said "Past behavior is the best indication of future behavior". Should've taken that sign seriously. No way I will ever be with a woman who dumps someone in order to be with me, I'm probably in for the same thing down the road. Screw that.

[EmperorR]

Thanks for your insightful stuff Tea, you are so right about everything. I've also realized that this isn't the sweet girl I used to know, but rather somebody else that took her place. She changed and the old her is never coming back, so I have no choice but to accept this.

 

I also like to think she is someone else's responsibility and problem right now. The poor chump she is dating right now is in for a living hell, and it feels good to know it aint me.

 

As for waking up in the morning, I suppose these things have a way of getting numb as time passes. I have deleted all the remaining chat logs, I have moved the pics to some HDD I never use (but I doubt I'm going to look at them ever again) and on Monday I'm throwing away everything she ever gave me, including a nice watch, expensive sunglasses etc. I don't need to have these object in my closet anymore, they are just a reminder of a girl who doesn't exist anymore.

 

I could either grieve the loss of the girl I once used to know, or accept that she's been replaced by someone else. I choose acceptance.

Anyways, thank you for sharing these insightful opinions, it helps a lot reading all this.

-------

Emperor, it's actually pretty obvious why NC is so necessary. As long as they retain a presence in your life, it's next to impossible to move on. Be it just as friends, acquaintances or whatever. I actually did what you want to do right now (calling names, cursing) and it alleviated some pain, I felt like she was finally getting the treatment she deserved. Too bad she probably showed those emails to her friends and boyfriends, most likely crying and calling me a horrible person This person has no shame really.

 

I actually think she dumped some guy so that she could be with me in the past. I'm not sure who he was (I had nothing to do with it, had no knowledge about the matter whatsoever), as she never talked about it, but I'm positive that someone got dumped. Should've taken that as a first serious red flag. Someone wise once said "Past behavior is the best indication of future behavior". Should've taken that sign seriously. No way I will ever be with a woman who dumps someone in order to be with me, I'm probably in for the same thing down the road. Screw that.

 

Past behavior is the best indication of future behavior

 

 

truer words never spoken, My ex moved from another country to canada and she had a bf back there adn she moved and didn't even tell him, but of course she told me how bad he treated her etc and showed me emails of him cursing her calling her names etc, and I was like oh no what a horrible guy. When now it looks like it was all true, has always been selfish and a little harlot.

 

And I guess that's one reasoN why I never sent her emails calling her every name in the book, because knowing her she would probably show her new guy and use see what a horrible guy he is etc.

 

I did what you did, deleted all the pics, threw out all the cards she gave me, the stupid teddy bear that said I loved you, the wallet she bought me, I just have a few more stuff that she bought me, a shirt a tie which im going to throw away, and as well a psp which i'll sell or give to a kid at christmas

[Surfer Dude]

I've been feeling much better once I got enough sleep this afternoon. I realized that depression often kicks in when I'm really tired, like this time when I haven't slept in 2 days.

 

Anyways, this gloomy cold European winter is really not helping. I'm thinking of going on vacation to some warm tropical place. I could use change for a while, to break free from monotony.

 

I want to start dating again, but I've been putting it off lately. I'm not really into rebounds, one night stands, short term relationships. I want to find a stable long term girlfriend, someone to share special connection with, sux that those are so hard to come by at this age Wish me luck guys.. I'm gonna need it.

[TeaAbraham]

Interesting. The wintertime is actually making me feel better. It's so nice to see some snow.

 

I'm glad you want to start dating, that you are open to letting other women into your life. I don't like short-term relationships either. I like to know that there's something special between us. I am sure you will find what you are looking for. It will just take time. I am sure that now especially you've got a lot of lovin' in ya, and you can treat a woman right.

 

Good Luck! And Godspeed.

[EmperorR]

I've been feeling much better once I got enough sleep this afternoon. I realized that depression often kicks in when I'm really tired, like this time when I haven't slept in 2 days.

 

Anyways, this gloomy cold European winter is really not helping. I'm thinking of going on vacation to some warm tropical place. I could use change for a while, to break free from monotony.

 

I want to start dating again, but I've been putting it off lately. I'm not really into rebounds, one night stands, short term relationships. I want to find a stable long term girlfriend, someone to share special connection with, sux that those are so hard to come by at this age Wish me luck guys.. I'm gonna need it.

 

how old are you?

 

I'm not into reobunds either, I'm talking to a girl right now of course I told her my whole story I know I shouldn't have but ah well

[TeaAbraham]

Haha. I would try to avoid telling a new girl about this until our relationship is really serious. I think that would really drive her away! Especially obsessing over it.

 

Wow. It is kind of nice to think about all of the possibilities out there now. Not only new women, but also just the ability to go where my feet take me. So exciting!

[Surfer Dude]

how old are you?

 

I'm not into reobunds either, I'm talking to a girl right now of course I told her my whole story I know I shouldn't have but ah well

 

I'm 21.

 

It really sucks when you meet a cool girl but you're still grieving the loss of your old relationship, you can't keep your mouth shut and you tell her everything about your situation.

Happened to me a few times, needless to say, it ruined my chances. haha

[UnamedSeven]

I'm 21.

 

It really sucks when you meet a cool girl but you're still grieving the loss of your old relationship, you can't keep your mouth shut and you tell her everything about your situation.

Happened to me a few times, needless to say, it ruined my chances. haha

Ehh, it wasn't a "complete" loss. At least now you know not to do that in the future. If it does happen, where, you are grieving the loss of a relationship, while being in another, then i think it would be right for you to talk to the girl in your relationship. I'm sure that she would understand where you are coming from. Not to mention, but keeping something like that, a secret, isn't a good thing for a healthy relationship.

[Surfer Dude]

I can't believe the progress I'm making. Today is the first day that I didn't spend hours thinking about her. In fact, this whole breakup crap seems so distant, as if it happened ages ago.

 

Today she's been a total stranger in my mind, someone I don't know anymore. Anything she does, with whom she does it and whatever... it just seems so irrelevant, like it's some random stranger I'm thinking about.

 

I'm really happy I've spent maybe only 1 hour thinking about her and her new boyfriend, instead of 12 hours like the previous days.

 

NC really does work, if it hadn't been for that, I don't think I would ever be able to move on.

She matters so little right now, I even feel a bit guilty about it, lol. That's a good sign anyway. Her presence is totally dissolving in my life.

[EmperorR]

I can't believe the progress I'm making. Today is the first day that I didn't spend hours thinking about her. In fact, this whole breakup crap seems so distant, as if it happened ages ago.

 

Today she's been a total stranger in my mind, someone I don't know anymore. Anything she does, with whom she does it and whatever... it just seems so irrelevant, like it's some random stranger I'm thinking about.

 

I'm really happy I've spent maybe only 1 hour thinking about her and her new boyfriend, instead of 12 hours like the previous days.

 

NC really does work, if it hadn't been for that, I don't think I would ever be able to move on.

She matters so little right now, I even feel a bit guilty about it, lol. That's a good sign anyway. Her presence is totally dissolving in my life.

 

 

NC does work, however you still get bad days, I'm on day 70 and sometimes I feel like I'm over it, today I felt great then I had to pass by where my ex lives now and I felt like crap.

[WiseOne1]

well sometimes its good to push someone away forever, I guess I tryed to push my ex away but It didnt work, still I could have tried harder if I really wanted to I could have.