Mum's on the edge

[windows]

First time in this part of the woods but here goes.

I've never posted here before but its the first time since I've realised my parents are having problems.

My dad's becoming fustrated with his job right now and he's not getting that well deserved promotion. So guess what; he vents. Nothing wrong with venting but... he vents against his family. Not through physical abuse (thank goodness) but he just has a selfish grumpy mood.

Mum really wants to support him but every time she tries to talk to him it teeters on the verge of an argument. My dad's stressed; which makes my mum stressed; which makes me worry about them. I can't say anything otherwise it'll be full blown war.

I know what's wrong but I have no idea what to do. I hate to say it but my dad's too absorbed in his own world right now that nothing my mum says will make sense to him. If this continues; my mum just might lose it.

Any advice how to help a fustrated career man reaching a mid-life crisis?

[Ronni_W]

Can't really think of too much.

Have you considered having a private chat with him -- maybe take him for coffee or brunch -- something like, "Dad, we know you're stressed about work and disappointed that your promotion isn't coming through. I'm not sure that you're aware that you're taking it out on the family, especially mom, so I thought it best to give you a heads-up about that. We want to be supportive but we need you to tell us what you need. Right now, we're just feeling like your 'venting machines' and it's not so good."

 

Or. Suggest to your mom that she have a nice, relaxed chat with him along similar lines.