will he call this time?

[aw]

I met a guy thru some friends, we hit it off and he called after 2 days to go out. We went to dinner and took a long walk, talking the entire time. We messed around a little and than he said he should go bf things got too serious. He told me he had a good time he said he would call and he didn't. I called him the next week and left a message saying I had a good time and I was wondering if he'd like to go out again, but I didn't hear from him, so I thought he was blowing me off after a great date. Then I saw him out the next week, he apologized for not calling, saying he was out of town when I called and then was at work til 10 pm everynight that week. I felt hurt and said "you don't have to lie" kind of joking with him and he said he wasn't. We chatted for a few minutes and he said "what if I called you next week?" I said ok and and he said "but not if you think I'm lying" I said I didn't and that I'd really like it if he called me. So now it's been 5 days and he hasn't called. Should I just move on? Why would he make a point of saying he call this week if he was blowing me off before, jsut to do it again. What's going on???? He seems like a nice guy and we have several friends in common.

[Teresa]

My advice to you is to move on. This sounds like the case of a guy who is scared or after the date began to move more quickly than he expected, he bailed. I have had my share of guys who behaved this way, and the truth is, if they don't call 2 times after they said they would, then they likely never will, and if they do, do you want someone whose so flaky? I think you can and will do better. Good luck!

 

 

 

I met a guy thru some friends, we hit it off and he called after 2 days to go out. We went to dinner and took a long walk, talking the entire time. We messed around a little and than he said he should go bf things got too serious. He told me he had a good time he said he would call and he didn't. I called him the next week and left a message saying I had a good time and I was wondering if he'd like to go out again, but I didn't hear from him, so I thought he was blowing me off after a great date. Then I saw him out the next week, he apologized for not calling, saying he was out of town when I called and then was at work til 10 pm everynight that week. I felt hurt and said "you don't have to lie" kind of joking with him and he said he wasn't. We chatted for a few minutes and he said "what if I called you next week?" I said ok and and he said "but not if you think I'm lying" I said I didn't and that I'd really like it if he called me. So now it's been 5 days and he hasn't called. Should I just move on? Why would he make a point of saying he call this week if he was blowing me off before, jsut to do it again. What's going on???? He seems like a nice guy and we have several friends in common.

[Totally Confused]

The work thing was just an excuse. It's not that he doesn't like you, he doesn't even know you. You don't know what else could be going on in his life, for example, was there someone else that he had feelings for, even before he met you and he's confused? You don't know. Or maybe there was some things about you that he liked and enjoyed, but not enough to pursue a serious relationship. You could ask yourself WHY WHY WHY??? and ask everyone around you what they think, until you're blue in the face and the only person who will be able to answer it is him. He knows why. But you can't ask him, because that might come across as a little too pushy or he may not even tell you the real reason why as you can tell when he already answered you with "Oh I was busy with the work thing until 10:00 every night. WHat there was no phone. I once had a kid call me from a pay phone from NYcity all the way to Boston, cause he didn't have a phone and he wanted to talk to me ( I had met him at the beach one day). The whole conversation, he had to keep putting money in. That's a man that's interested. If this guy were interested, he would have found a way or time to call - NO EXCUSES. I've started a new job, where I don't even have a minute to breathe and I always find time to at least call my boyfriend and tell him hello, even if it's a 2 second convo. It takes one minute to set up a date. You mean to tell me that this guy hasn't called one single person in a week, cause he worked until 10:00 everynight? What about Sat and Sun. He's full of excuses. Now you have no choice but to move on and go about your life. There is no guarantee that he will call. Now when you last saw him, if he calls you within 2 - 4 days after seeing you saw him the second time, then OK, he's a gentleman and worth going on another date with. At this point, maybe he's changed his mind and has decided to get to know you. But if he waits any longer, you've got your answer...he's obviously not looking for a serious relationship with you. It doesn't mean your a bad person or that you did something to turn him off, It's like I said, you don't know what's going on in his life and only he has the answer to why he didn't want to pursue a relationship. Instead of looking at it as your loss, why not look at it as his loss. He's the one that didn't want to take the time to get to know you and all your great qualitites. He's obviously not a chance taker. He missed out on a girl (You) who could probably be a great girlfriend and love him very much. Think of other things he's probably missed out on, because he didn't give things a chance for whatever reason. Maybe his mother tried to feed him broccoli as a child and because of the color, he wouldn't give it a chance. Now that he's older, he won't eat broccoli and automatically says he doesn't like it, when he doesn't even really know, because he didn't give it a chance. Broccoli's a really cool vegetable, but how would he know. One day he'll end up eating squash and think it's the best vegetable, but he'll never know that it's nothing compared to broccoli and broccoli is really the best. You need a man of the world. Don't worry, there are men who will fall head over heels for you. You'll be just perfect for them. Hey, you can't be perfect for everyone, cause then you'd have to marry all the men in the world and that would leave no one for the rest of us woman, plus you'll be breaking a few laws. Maybe this guy blowing you off is good, cause now you'll be free for when the right guy comes a long. Then you'll be happy it didn't work out with this one. Sort of a blessing in disguise.

 

Anyway, good luck and don't worry, things will work out on there own. You won't have to do a thing but go on with your life as it comes to you. Just let it go, move on and wait to see what happens.