Labia adhesions in my 10 year old daughter

[amaysngrace]

Hey. I brought my daughter to the doctor today for her well visit and flu shot.

 

The doctor examined her and told me she has a labia adhesion and it usually clears up once she will hit puberty.

 

I decided to look it up online. From what I've read it says it can be caused by sexual abuse.

 

I know I am probably just ultra sensitive to reading this but right now I am a complete and total mess.

 

It also said it can be caused by fabric softener and I am the queen of downy. So that gives me hope.

 

But I just can't erase the other cause of it. And it sucks.

[LittleDove]

Amaysngrace I almost stopped breathing when I read this... so I did a google too, and it seems to be something that isnt too rare in girls under 10.

PHEW.ease off the searches! google is your friend, sometimes.

 

Unless you have reason to think theres been something happen to her, or someone around who could or would touch her.... dont worry.

At least you can treat it now you know about it.

[norajane]

Your doctor didn't sound concerned, like he thought there might have been abuse. By saying he thought it would clear up once she hit puberty, it sounds like he thought it was a relatively common occurrence and not a cause for worry about abuse.

 

Doctors are required to report cases of abuse. If he thought that's what this was, I'm sure he would have said something to you about it.

[Green]

Your doctor didn't sound concerned, like he thought there might have been abuse. By saying he thought it would clear up once she hit puberty, it sounds like he thought it was a relatively common occurrence and not a cause for worry about abuse.

 

Doctors are required to report cases of abuse. If he thought that's what this was, I'm sure he would have said something to you about it.

 

Depending on your state and what the law is I'm guessing doctors have to report suspected abuse. You sound very paranoid, how does a dr. even find such a thing in a little girl? any ways who did you think abused your daughter?

[amaysngrace]

Thanks girls. I know it's probably common but from what I've read it's actually more common in girls under age six. Toddlers and small children get this more than prepubesent girls do.

 

She is ten.

 

When the doctor told me this I actually said "at least I know the adults I leave her with can be trusted". OMG how dumb. I thought it was sealed up. And that made me think nobody probed her. But from what I've read it is just the opposite.

 

She's with her dad right now. He has a history of abuse. Not sexual but it's not that big a leap.

 

Right now my mind is racing and I cannot trust anyone. All kinds of bad thoughts are creeping into my mind.

 

I just want to grab her up and hug her but she's not here.

[amaysngrace]

You sound very paranoid, how does a dr. even find such a thing in a little girl? any ways who did you think abused your daughter?

 

I am very paranoid. I was molested when I was a little girl. So yes I guess maybe I'm being super-sensitive right now. But I just can't help it.

 

The doctor checks her for development. That's one of the places that she checked.

[Trialbyfire]

amaysn, don't you think this is a topic to discuss with your child? At ten, she should have been taught at school about inappropriate touching. Why not check with her school to find out what's been discussed, then utilizing a similar methodology, in a pragmatic fashion, consider it a follow-up discussion with your daughter, as a preventative measure to ensure she's comfortable talking to you about it, if it should ever happen in the future.

[amaysngrace]

amaysn, don't you think this is a topic to discuss with your child? At ten, she should have been taught at school about inappropriate touching. Why not check with her school to find out what's been discussed, then utilizing a similar methodology, in a pragmatic fashion, consider it a follow-up discussion with your daughter, as a preventative measure to ensure she's comfortable talking to you about it, if it should ever happen in the future.

 

We have talked about it and talked about it and talked about it. Inappropriate touching. Touches that make you feel weird instead of happy.

 

It could very well be that I use too much fabric softener and it can also be from a wet bathing suit. In summer we are on the beach all day every day. It could also be that I use fabric softener when I wash her bathing suit.

 

I just feel all dizzy in my head right now. My mind is racing and my body is numb.

[Green]

We have talked about it and talked about it and talked about it. Inappropriate touching. Touches that make you feel weird instead of happy.

 

It could very well be that I use too much fabric softener and it can also be from a wet bathing suit. In summer we are on the beach all day every day. It could also be that I use fabric softener when I wash her bathing suit.

 

I just feel all dizzy in my head right now. My mind is racing and my body is numb.

 

maybe you should go see some one about this like a counsler at church or a psychologist... some one you can talk too about yourself because you don't sound well. At 10 years old your daughter should be able to come to you if somethings happening why don't you just put your trust in that and stop traumotizing yourself

[michelangelo]

From what i understand, adhesions are the norm for undeveloped genitalia of both genders.

 

Boys with uncircumcised foreskins, girls the equivalent. It has to do with normal development. These things tend to clear up when sex hormones promote growth spurts.

 

Not knowing of such things can make a person worry unnecessarily.

 

If it will ease your mind, have you seen by a different doctor.

[amaysngrace]

After talking to my BF I feel a little better now. He says to rule him out but I can't rule out anything right now. I can't say for certain about any one thought either. So I am stuck somewhere in between.

 

I am going to the pediatricians in the morning. I have some questions I need to have answered on her take of this whole thing. I need to find out what she thinks is the cause. I need to hear it from her one way or the other.

 

Then maybe I'll feel better.

 

The one thing that is helping is knowing my daughter has none of the tell-tale signs of being molested. Her demeanor hasn't changed at all. She is still the same great kid as ever.

 

So I just have to keep thinking about this until tomorrow.

 

Thanks guys.

[whichwayisup]

I hope to GOD it isn't abuse..But, just to be on the safe side, why not buy one of those hidden camera's and put it in her room. Or a voice activated recorder.. Sorry to suggest this, just typing it out makes my stomach lurch..

 

In the meantime, stop using fabric softner.

[Green]

seriously your having some kind of panic attack, if you really think your bf is molesting your daughter you shouldn't have asked him... you should ask your daughter of course he's going to say he didn't

[norajane]

Your concern made me Google...and all I got were pages and pages and pages of hits of medical sites discussing how common labial adhesions are. I had to specifically google labial adhesions and child abuse before I got any hits on the connection.

 

So, I think the odds are heavily in your favor that is this isn't what you fear.

[nittygritty]

Not that it means anything but I've never heard of a Dr. routinely checking 10 year old girl's labia during a well visit and flu shot. Had you told the Dr. that your daughter had complained of pain in that area before the exam? Was there a nurse in the room during the exam?

[amaysngrace]

I was in the room at the time. They check. My son is eleven and the doctor checked him for a hernia. I left the room for that but I listened through the door. He'd have been freaked out with a nurse there. He didn't even want me there.

 

I asked my son about it when we got into the car. I have to let them know it's okay to be checked out by the doctor. I'm usually pretty balanced when it comes to this. I don't want to pass on my neurosis.

 

It's just seeing that triggered all kinds of bad crap in my head. Not just my BF but my daughter's dad, my oldest son, my brother, close friends' husbands, and the list goes on.

 

I could not rule anyone out. I was a mess last night.

 

But today I went to the pediatricians. I was still pretty much a mess. The doctor wasn't in and they were mad busy doing flu shots but a nurse spoke to me and showed me my daughter's file. The doctor made no notations of suspicion and the nurse assured me that she is one that surely would. She said all of the doctors would but she would especially.

 

I apologized to her for being neurotic. She said "You're a mom. That's your job".

 

Then she gave me a hug.

[electric_sheep]

Google can make one positively paranoid and schizophrenic. It's possible to find good "evidence" for any stance on any issue. It's great for making you worry about things you've never even heard of.

[Mary3]

It just seems weird they would check the labia for abrasions when getting a flu shot !

 

I would check out a Rape crisis center and discuss your concerns. They will know if she is ashamed or protecting a possible molester.

 

To let this go is unthinkable until all stones are turned.

 

Do it now while she is young so she can get counseling if God forbid she is being molested.

 

If she isnt then no harm done . The rest of her life is ahead of her.

[amaysngrace]

It just seems weird they would check the labia for abrasions when getting a flu shot !

 

I would check out a Rape crisis center and discuss your concerns. They will know if she is ashamed or protecting a possible molester.

 

To let this go is unthinkable until all stones are turned.

 

Do it now while she is young so she can get counseling if God forbid she is being molested.

 

If she isnt then no harm done . The rest of her life is ahead of her.

 

Thanks for your advice but she needed a well-check prior to having a flu shot. They do a full examination during a well-check.

 

I know she hasn't been molested. I KNOW. Before when I went there I 99% knew but there was that 1% doubt. Because I am sensitive to the issue all I could think about was that 1% and disregard the other 99.

 

She set my mind at ease. One hundred percent.

 

On a side note I know what children go through after being molested. She has no signs of emotional distress that is consistent with being molested. Not a single one.