Dads ignorance driving me mad

[daveuk]

My fiance and i have had to stay with my parents for a few weeks, while some improovements are made to our home. And the excessive-impulsive complaints which are grossly exagerated that my father is making are bringing me very close to the edge of my patients.

 

I've been an insulin dependant diabetic for 4 years now 5 injections and 2 pills per day in an attempt to control it with little luck. As a result i've great difficulty with tiredness. Over this 4 year period my father still can't remember the 2 basics of doabeties. 1 low blood sugar means eat something 2 high bloodsugar means take some insulin.

 

Today my father could not wake me up my fiance and mother where out shopping, i dont remember all he said but i do remember briefly waking and falling asleep several times to he ranting and shouting it was something about drug addicts and alcoholics. When my fiance (Heather) and mother came home and Heather checked my bloodsugar levels the reading was 1.8 and as ive been told by my doctor anything below 2.8 can be dangerous.

Being the blessing she is Heather practicaly forced some energy drinks down me and soon got me back to normal.

 

Now as if that had not made the day a bit of a rough one for me, the fist thing my father said to me was. "i'm bloody sick of you its like living with an alcoholic or a drug addict the way you stay up all night and then we cant wake you up your a disgrace" now of course most people would tell me why not just explain to your dad what was going on im shure he would understand. Well no, you see he has this phobia that im up all night on the computer which to be truthfull every other weekend i am. Yes im on the computer of a day, sometimes for several hours but on the other hand i dont watch television, its come to a point now where there are so many advertisements on the television i simply dont enjoy it being on in the same rooms as me. Where as my father must watch a good 8 hours television each day.

He believes i'm up all night everynight on the computer playing games, which im not this laptop does not even have a video card capable of playing simplistic games. I can take all that rubbish though i know its not true and he's only making himself look stupid.

 

But now he's got my mother saying it too, saying im like a drug addict or some acoholic the way i wont/cant get up in the morning, everymorning.

 

its not everymorning, yes i admit i have horrible trouble waking up but its not just in the morning its whenever im asleep getting me to wake up is very difficult. But im at the end of my tether with theze insults i have never taken any illegal substances and at christmas/birthday partys i might have something to drink but ive never seen the fun in getting into a drunken state.

 

You look like a drunk/alcoholic

your ruening your life

your like some sort of smack-head/drug addict

your making me ill with worry

im ashamed to let anyone in the house and they ask where you are, and you sleeping.

your doing the same thing to your brother, messing him up just like you are (yup every other weekend me and my brother stay up most of the night playing video games)

 

And thats just the tip of it all reading back on what im typing it looks like i must be leaving something out but if that where true i wouldent cringe each time i have to take insulin because my own father says i look like a drug addict.

 

He got to me that much today i felt like i was going to burst and take a swing at him. I've so much respect for my parents but its waning away and it seems they're pulling all the strings they can to make me lose my temper so i needed to come on here and speak my mind to who ever wishes to listen in the hope someone can offor a little insight as to how i can keep myself from aggressivly losing my temper for just another 9 days when i can go home. Talking to them does not work as they have the "i am right and you are wrong" attitude when i've tried to explain how diabeties works to help them understand my tiredness apparently i am just wrong and i should be used to it by now.. I can't take much more ignorance

[vintagecat]

I have an entire family tree full of insulin and non-insulin dependent diabetics, some fairly brittle and I wonder at whether there isn't some possibility at getting better glucose control for your own sake. Sleeping hours beyond the norm for a diabetic of your age and disease progression steals your life. Never mind what your parents say (which is abusive) for the good of yourself and your fiance, I'd say what you are describing isn't normal for diabetics with good glucose control. I urge you to seek the services of the best diabetic specialist that you can find. I know what I'm talking about from first hand experience.

 

On to problem solving: If it is only for a short time, I'd move in to a hostel or residence type inn with weekly and/or monthly rates if it were me. There is no point in tolerating any more abuse and nothing you will do or say is going to change the situation with your parents, it will only increase with added time. As for the computer versus TV, it's just a red herring. Practically everyone wastes time whether it's in front of one screen or another or reading pulp novels or playing repetitive games. Chances are this thing is about your father feeling imposed upon and venting, but that's just a guess on my part. Thank them for allowing you to stay in their home (because it is an imposition on them and not a right of an adult child to come "home" again) and find a way to get out ASAP.

 

Good luck to you.

[nleeh]

I can hear your anquish but alas, you will soon be out of their house or maybe already are. I can empathize with you because my parents have their own ideas about how to live, how they live and their own thoughts on matters and often I am amiss about how to help them understand but it is no use. My way of dealing with their ideas on life is to see them for who they are and know that I have my own ideas and feelings...they simply do not match what theirs are and never will. So take heart and know that how you deal with your life is okay and let them rattle on about their own thougths and feelings. It is hard, I know, but you are living your life as you need and if they do not understand, know that you know the truth for yourself. It is hard when living with them to tolerate their mis understanding but knowing that you only have to deal with them for a short periods of time it is best to let them have their opinions while keeping your own and accept them for who they are and more important know who you are.

 

nleeh

[SierraRose]

I agree with Vintage..go to an Extend Stay Hotel...rates are reasonable and definately worth your sanity.

I don't know much about diabetes; however, I think you ought to see your doctor a.s.a.p. While you are there, get some pamplets on diabetes. Leave them on the kitchen counter at mom and dad's without saying a word.