Any suggestions?

[user23]

I have tried every positive thing I can think of to help my girlfriend get back to a healthy weight over the last two years. Nothing has worked.

Before everyone freaks out on me, she (25 yrs. old) went from an active (softball, mountain biking, walking) 130 lbs @ 5'2" to 180 lbs in two years. She is a nurse, and knows the dangers of not taking care of your body over the long term. She is very unhappy with the way she looks, but can't seem to find the motivation to do anything about it. I love her very much and I am worried about her health. I exercise 4 days a week, watch what I eat, and stay in shape. I would'nt expect her to try anything I couldn't do myself.

[Geishawhelk]

Simple but true:

 

You cannot change others.

There might be something else at the root of this.

Also, are her parents 'big'...?

 

I'm a petite 4'10" weighing a little over 8-stone (119lbs) but my 24-year old daughter is 5'3" and weighs 18-stone (250lbs.) her dad is also 'big'.

[Posco_Proudfoot]

I have tried every positive thing I can think of to help my girlfriend get back to a healthy weight over the last two years. Nothing has worked.

Before everyone freaks out on me, she (25 yrs. old) went from an active (softball, mountain biking, walking) 130 lbs @ 5'2" to 180 lbs in two years. She is a nurse, and knows the dangers of not taking care of your body over the long term. She is very unhappy with the way she looks, but can't seem to find the motivation to do anything about it. I love her very much and I am worried about her health. I exercise 4 days a week, watch what I eat, and stay in shape. I would'nt expect her to try anything I couldn't do myself.

How did she go from active to inactive in these two years? Is she trying to get attention, or already unhappy, and unwilling to acknowledge it?

[user23]

Simple but true:

 

You cannot change others.

There might be something else at the root of this.

Also, are her parents 'big'...?

 

I'm a petite 4'10" weighing a little over 8-stone (119lbs) but my 24-year old daughter is 5'3" and weighs 18-stone (250lbs.) her dad is also 'big'.

"You cannot change others"

So true.

 

"There might be something else at the root of this."

I'm afraid there could be something medical going on, but there is also a chance it's just lack of motivation. I know BC can cause weight gain, but probably not that much? She says she's happy relationship wise.

 

"Also, are her parents 'big'...?"

Her parents aren't big, but the not exactly "in shape" either.

[user23]

How did she go from active to inactive in these two years? Is she trying to get attention, or already unhappy, and unwilling to acknowledge it?

 

It changed when she graduated college and got a job as a nurse. She has alot more free time now, with no classes. She works three days a week. About once a month she'll go out for drinks with the girls, and we try to get out at least once a week. Most of the rest of her time is spent watching TV and sleeping. "Unhappy and unwilling to acknowledge it".........how would find out about/address that?

[Posco_Proudfoot]

It changed when she graduated college and got a job as a nurse. She has alot more free time now, with no classes. She works three days a week. About once a month she'll go out for drinks with the girls, and we try to get out at least once a week. Most of the rest of her time is spent watching TV and sleeping. "Unhappy and unwilling to acknowledge it".........how would find out about/address that?

It's hard to get people to do what is right and healthy. I think if this is the only issue in your relationship it isn't the very worse thing that could happen.

The only thing I would suggest is your concern of her health and lack of motivation. Maybe try and workout together or cook healthier foods together.

Find way to encourage her. But ultimately, she will have to do it.

[mark982]

has she been to a dr.? there might be some depression.