Having difficulties with coping with LDR and a close and getting closer friend

[TheTruth35]

So my girlfriend lived in the US last year with me and moved back to Asia in the spring. In total we have been together almost 2 years with half of it LDR. As of right now, things are ok because we have time to skype before she works and before I go out in the evenings or go to bed. I went and visited her in the summer and will go and visit her very soon. There are now two things that are bothering me. One is that it is getting really hard to cope with the long distance and along with that, our schedules will change next spring and we will have seemingly no time to communicate. The second thing is that I have a very good friend here who knows about my girlfriend and things, but I (and I know this is not good), but I am starting to have feelings for her and I am pretty sure she has them for me, though we are keeping things at bay because of my relationship and she respects that. I don't know what to do and I honestly don't see my girlfriend and I staying together when our schedules change....it won't even be a relationship. Also with the deal with my friend.....I don't know what to do...Any suggestins?

[wildflowerchild98]

So my girlfriend lived in the US last year with me and moved back to Asia in the spring. In total we have been together almost 2 years with half of it LDR. As of right now, things are ok because we have time to skype before she works and before I go out in the evenings or go to bed. I went and visited her in the summer and will go and visit her very soon. There are now two things that are bothering me. One is that it is getting really hard to cope with the long distance and along with that, our schedules will change next spring and we will have seemingly no time to communicate. The second thing is that I have a very good friend here who knows about my girlfriend and things, but I (and I know this is not good), but I am starting to have feelings for her and I am pretty sure she has them for me, though we are keeping things at bay because of my relationship and she respects that. I don't know what to do and I honestly don't see my girlfriend and I staying together when our schedules change....it won't even be a relationship. Also with the deal with my friend.....I don't know what to do...Any suggestins?

Let me say this. If you really love this womanyou CAN make it work You say that next spring your schedules will change and you will have no time to communicate well when you want something it is often not easy to obtain and you have to work hard for it and it may be struggle but most good things in life are a struggle and do not come easily We have to fight for it!!! Are you willing to not make it work? I spend 2 years talking to my love only via phone I was in PA in College and he was in CA now granted it is the same country but at two entirely different ends and my scheduled changed all the time and we made it work. Are you just wanting to be with this other girl because you are lonely? because she is closer and can give you a physical connection? You have alot of thinking to do and I wish you all the luck in the world!~Chrissy

[dmarisca]

I totally agree with your reply, Chrissy. Long distance relationship works wonderfully well only if you are loyal, dedicated and willing to accept the absence of your loved one beside you. I know more successful long distance relationships than ones where people lived as close together as any. Might as well say that short distance relationships don't work! I came across an opinion poll - "having a long distance relationship is hard..." no wonder why we can see mixed responses for this debate.

[TheTruth35]

[sIZE=2]

I think you guys are both right. Maybe it is because I am lonely and it feels good to have someone close to you like my friend. My last three relationships have all been long distance...don't ask me how it happened because I still don't know. I really want to be my girlfriend, so much...but it gets hard and very tiring when not being able to be with the one who you want to be with. We are going to talk about what is going to happen in the spring when I go visit her soon, I just don't know how long I can continuosly be in a ldr without getting tired of being alone....because I want my girlfriend. the friend I spoke of is just like a thought in the back of my mind that I try to quiet and I know I/we should just keep it as friends because it's not like I am going to break up with my girlfriend and then start dating my close friend.....all this is just so frustrating

[/sIZE]