The relationship with the love of my life has ended

[lovesickforRob]

I just broke up with the love of my life. He says he wants to forget me because I lied about kissing a couple of guys right when we first met. I dont think its fair because we weren't technically going out. He has asked me to fess up to anything a few times but I denied everything until last night when he read some messages. Then i fessed up but I dont see how he hates me so much now for something that happened when we werent technically together. PLEASE HELP! I NEED ADVICE

[whichwayisup]

How long have you two been together? Also, why did you hang onto old messages that were about you kissing other guys when you two first started dating?

 

All you can do is give him space and time, let him miss you, see what life is like without you. Hopefully he'll change his mind, once he's calmed down and thought about things.

[Benique]

Tell him that you were not willing to hurt him,

thats why you did not tell him ,

and those guys were not that significant to you.

Otherwise THEY would have become your BF and not him

[lovesickforRob]

I don't usually delete messages. It was on my myspace, I never thought he would see them but somehow I guess I was still logged on and he read through my messages. I told him I will never hurt him again. He said he wanted to forget about me, never see me again, he doesnt even want to think about me. He told me he fell in love with me and i hurt him and now he will never come back to me. Do you think he is just saying that because he's hurting and is trying to hurt me or do you think hes telling what he really feels. I really wish I could have him back.

[Gremio]

I don't usually delete messages. It was on my myspace, I never thought he would see them but somehow I guess I was still logged on and he read through my messages. I told him I will never hurt him again. He said he wanted to forget about me, never see me again, he doesnt even want to think about me. He told me he fell in love with me and i hurt him and now he will never come back to me. Do you think he is just saying that because he's hurting and is trying to hurt me or do you think hes telling what he really feels. I really wish I could have him back.

 

I have been there before... actually I have been the guy in your situation, to a T. I was dating a woman and we were starting to get serious. One night some friends told me they saw her out with some guy at a club making out with him. She denied it up and down while my friends swore by it. Then she finally admitted what happened. I was pissed for two reasons. 1) she was making out with someone, but I was more pissed because 2) she lied to me and tried to cover it up.

 

She was so apologetic. She even left a beautiful card on my car when I was at the gym one day. I decided to take her back (or maintain contact) because I felt she was so sincere. The problem in this? I lost trust in her. No matter how many months we were together, that was always in the back on of my mind. I felt betrayed.

[lovesickforRob]

I have been there before... actually I have been the guy in your situation, to a T. I was dating a woman and we were starting to get serious. One night some friends told me they saw her out with some guy at a club making out with him. She denied it up and down while my friends swore by it. Then she finally admitted what happened. I was pissed for two reasons. 1) she was making out with someone, but I was more pissed because 2) she lied to me and tried to cover it up.

 

She was so apologetic. She even left a beautiful card on my car when I was at the gym one day. I decided to take her back (or maintain contact) because I felt she was so sincere. The problem in this? I lost trust in her. No matter how many months we were together, that was always in the back on of my mind. I felt betrayed.

 

but I didn't cheat on him while we were boyfriend and girlfriend. I told him I was confused about him when we first met because he is my first boyfriend. I wasnt sure if he was just using me or if he really cared. I didnt kiss those other guys, they kissed me at drunken parties. But then i realized they dont mean anything to me. My boyfriend means the world to me. I should have told him but I honestly didnt think it counted as cheating. Would you think about your ex differently if she was in this situation? Would you still feel betrayed?

[Gremio]

but I didn't cheat on him while we were boyfriend and girlfriend. I told him I was confused about him when we first met because he is my first boyfriend. I wasnt sure if he was just using me or if he really cared. I didnt kiss those other guys, they kissed me at drunken parties. But then i realized they dont mean anything to me. My boyfriend means the world to me. I should have told him but I honestly didnt think it counted as cheating. Would you think about your ex differently if she was in this situation? Would you still feel betrayed?

 

Even if I said no, I would be lying to myself. It would still hurt. The problem is you lied until he found proof. My ex did the same thing.

 

Even if you get back together, he will never trust you, not even if he says he does. I've been there, I know how it feels.

[T-town]

I lied

 

This is why he is pissed, I would be too...give him space.