Basic dating strategy? lol

[yongyong]

so I am an asian guy with strong asian culture background.

 

I've interacted with about hundred of women in various places (club, school, coffee, online chatting) so I have no problem for having good conversation. But I had few formal date with American women though

 

I got this tall blonde girl's # after quick conversation. After almost 2 weeks, we met at coffee place for first time and drove around little bit.

all I did was holding her hand (asian manner right there lol)

this girl seemed very long term type and I don't want to ruin it by making move fast...

 

she mentioned about going to movie during conversation and we set up time for this friday.

(she said twice, 'do you want to go to movie?, I mean do you want to go out on a movie?' I am not sure if there is a big difference)

 

I have no problem for picking her up. should I ask her? or tell her I will see her there? (just don't want to be creepy or desperate)

 

what about kiss? (usually American women say they won't sleep with a guy on first date but I am talking about just a kiss here lol)

If everything goes right and I don't do that, Is it going to give her the impression that either I don't like her or I am a wuss?

 

In asian culture, if you guys had romantic kiss, that means both are agreed to go for relationship but I am sure it's not like that here.

 

I heard if I bring up the relationship first, I might scare her away or I will look desperate. so how can I make sure if she wants to see me exclusively (meaning no going out with other guys)

 

I saw a nice dress (only about $100, short dress which reveals her shoulder, will be awsome to wear around holiday season when we go out)

and want to get her for christmas but not sure if I should go with something very simple (like $20~30 bath set)

(it is weird to give your girl cheap gift from my culture but it seems different in U.S)

 

The point here is I can take her to nice restaurant and get her nice gift, I want to see her often since I like her but I don't want to be a very nice or creepy guy or make me look desperate. so I am basically saying I Should play game right (tried to be nice and romantic but it made it worse than when I wasn't giving her enough attention)

 

 

My goal is getting close with her as much as I can before christmas

so we can do something on christmas and new years eve as a couple.

[Anastasia0309]

Your so sweet! Maybe I need to be with a Asian guy. I love the way your culture works. It makes sense. First of all just speaking from my point of view, if a guy were to get me a $100 dress as a first gift, well it would have me thinking. I think you should go with getting her a victoria secret body spray set. It's expensive but a appropriate first gift.

 

As far as you picking her up or not for the movie date. I totatlly think you should pick her up and just kinda say "What time should I pick you up". Depending how on the date goes and what vibe you get from her. You will know if it's right to kiss her and when you should. But why the rush to get close to her? Why the rush to be a couple before Christmas and New Years? I dont' know how realisitc that is. She would have to really really like you. Which could happen cause you seem like a awesome guy!

[fishtaco]

I don't know about the dress. If you barely know her, do you know her size? Do you know her style, her taste?

 

As a first gift, or for someone you're not sure what they like, generic gifts are better. Scented candles, hand lotion, that sort of stuff. Generally, clothing, jewelry, perfume, these are things that are very susceptible to personal taste... don't go there unless you're sure.

 

You barely know her, the point of the gift is to show a gesture, an appreciation of the holiday tradition. You should never try to woo any woman with gifts. If this is your 10th anniversary, then that's a different story. People that have earned a special place in your life deserve special gifts. But this is a chick you barely met. She could gladly accept your $100 gift and never call you back again. If she's not interested in continuing to go on dates with you, you could buy her a $10,000 gift and that still won't change anything. If you could change her mind with a $10,000 gift then she's someone I suggest you DON'T date, unless it's just a business deal to you.

 

As for the date, the important thing is you're having a good time, and she's also having a good time as well. People like to be with people that they have a good time hanging out with. Take it easy, chill, kickback, and enjoy the date.

 

Don't have a schedule. If you artificially push for something, it usually won't work out. Well, if you play the game well then it could, but then you wouldn't be here asking for advice. X-mas and new year party may be too soon. If you hit it, great. If not, go for Valentine's day.

 

Anyway, that's what I think. You should consider other people's advice as well, and pick whatever you think is the best.