Mary3 Posted December 17, 2008 Share Posted December 17, 2008 I tried to help my friend who had buried his abuse by his father for 25 years. He never got any counseling for it and I thought having him talk about it would help. He is upset and getting some serious help right now. Does it really help to keep it buried ? He was acting out alot and some erratic behaviors. I thought getting him to talk about it would help him heal in some way.. He is upset with me because he said I brought it out front and it really hurts. I am not a doctor and I just wanted to help him. He is in therapy now and I am sorry if I hurt him by wanting him to heal. Can anyone advise about this former abuse and how should he best deal with it now ? What helped you ? Link to post Share on other sites
Eve Posted December 21, 2008 Share Posted December 21, 2008 I hope speaking with someone helps him - it will not be easy though. Maybe in time you can be friends again but right now I would leave him to get on with what he has to do. Gosh, its a big thing to open any boxes with someone who has been abused. Its all so complex! Just be his friend where you can, thats all we can do within whatever is happening in our friends lives methinks.Regards,Eve xx Link to post Share on other sites
Jay34 Posted December 23, 2008 Share Posted December 23, 2008 it does hurt a lot, keeping it in, it justs comes out in other ways, now the fact that he is in therapy is huge, getting it out in the open is painful, but i think it is better. i experienced this first hand and now am finally getting counseling, i have been burying it for 11 years, it takes a lot to let it out, I tried to help my ex-girlfriend with her problems and i am at least glad she is finally starting to recognize them, but she is still very much in denial and in that oh well mindset, it affects her so deeply though, she was emotionally abused... i pray that she gets the help she needs but she was doing way too many things that hurt me and i had to leave. it was really her inner child, i think you did the right thing. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Mary3 Posted December 25, 2008 Author Share Posted December 25, 2008 it does hurt a lot, keeping it in, it justs comes out in other ways, now the fact that he is in therapy is huge, getting it out in the open is painful, but i think it is better. i experienced this first hand and now am finally getting counseling, i have been burying it for 11 years, it takes a lot to let it out, I tried to help my ex-girlfriend with her problems and i am at least glad she is finally starting to recognize them, but she is still very much in denial and in that oh well mindset, it affects her so deeply though, she was emotionally abused... i pray that she gets the help she needs but she was doing way too many things that hurt me and i had to leave. it was really her inner child, i think you did the right thing. Thank you. We have talked to his inner child. This child tries to do so many disturbing things. He says he will tell me the full story someday soon. Link to post Share on other sites
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