I'm having these crazy deep feelings for my childhood best friend: Do I tell her??

[chan209]

I really don't know what to do....I'm having these crazy deep feelings for my childhood best friend. She's 26 and I'm a month away from being 26 (she's about 6 months older than me). We've known each other since we were born (literally). We went to the same church together, went to the same school, even graduated from high school together. After High School we went our seperate ways and lost contact with each other until about 2 years ago when we re-established contact. She has a 4 year old child right now (who is such a great kid ).

 

Since we regained contact, she's been through A LOT of personal stuff (which I won't go into detail about) where I was the only person there to help her through it all...the only person she could talk to. We tell each other EVERYTHING and completely trust each other like nobody else ever could. She was down on her luck...crappy job and all. I ended up going back to school in Spring 2003 and pushed her to go back as well to finish up so she could get a better job and give herself (and her son) a better life. She has gone back and now me and her even scheduled our classes together so we can commute over together.

 

She graduates in May and brought up the idea a few days ago about me and her moving in together and getting a place once we're both done and settled in jobs. She said it's because of me, how she wants a real positive influence/role model for her son, I'm the only guy she can trust (and trust with her child) and how I'm not an a**h***. She even went as far as to put me on the permission list to pick up her child from school.

 

One time she even mentioned I'm a "real man"...and she's been referring to me as "dear" a lot lately and will kinda brush up against/hit my arm once in awhile when something is funny (which she never used to before)....and has even referred to me as "honey".

 

I think the world of this girl. I swear I see her in a way that nobody else does. She's been there for me when I needed it most, as I've been there for her (not too long ago I drove 40 miles to help her when she called me when her car broke down). She's a very special person to me, as well as her son. Her attitude, sense of humor, personality...all shines bright in my eyes.

 

She has no boyfriend right now. In fact, she just broke up with the one she had a couple months ago. She broke up with him because the guy was jealous of her child and he was really jealous of me (how she'd come to me to talk, to hang out with, etc..).

 

I've been hunting for signs....

 

-- Anytime another girl's name comes up around me, she becomes a little hesitant, wonders who it is and asks about who it is. Even when we're out and I jokingly ask "What do you think of her? Would she be good for me?", she always finds some little reason why they're all not good for me. Admittedly, whenever she asks about a guy, I do the same thing.

 

-- She will mention a situation she was in with an ex and ask me what I would have done. For instance, she asked me what I would do if the girl I was with found out she couldn't have kids. I told her what I felt and she was really happy and told me she wasn't happy with what the ex said (at the time).

 

-- Regarding moving in together in the above post, we'd joke about how we'll still be living together when we're 50....then just the other day she told me on the phone that she didn't need a guy who treats her like crap when she's got me who treats her so well.

 

-- The other day we were out driving and she was making jokes about how I drive. She then seemed to get serious and said it was my only "flaw" and tried to think of any other potential "flaws", but couldn't and said that I was a perfect all-around guy....and compared me to her 2 ex's.

 

I'm getting the feeling that she could be having similar feelings but is scared to say anything as well.

 

I know all about the "friends zone" thing, but not sure how it works with people who you've known since birth.

 

I was fine until a couple months ago these feelings started in...

 

I don't know what to do...do I tell her how I feel or just leave it in God's hands?

[Tony T]

God's not going to make a move on her...you need to and you need to make it soon. This lady clearly things a lot of you and has a love for you. You absolutely need to tell her how you feel because it really does sound like there could be something special here for the both of you.

 

This stuff about the two of you asking about other people is a lot of garbage. When you think highly of a female in a loving way, you don't give her advice about other guys and you don't let her get into your business. You need to tell her your feelings and set the record straight.

[moimeme]

If you want to do it in a roundabout way, next time any sort of talk about couples or exes or something similar comes up, say something along the lines of 'do you think we'd make a good pair'?

 

It's a little easier on the system than just coming right out with your feelings.