sugarcoated Posted December 26, 2008 Share Posted December 26, 2008 I read a book titled "He's just not into you" and it said if a guy doesn't call you then "he's just not into you." That was exactly what happened between a guy who I dated briefly and me, I thought. I had the longest crush on him and when we finally dated I thought it would last. It didn't and he never explained why it didn't. He called all the shots and I let him because I liked him too much. I will never learn. I moved on eventually because I thought he wasn't into me. A year later he contacted me and wanted to see me again. He showed me that he still liked me. We went out then I never heard from him again. I don't understand why it is so difficult for him to tell me what he wanted. I wanted answers but didn't want to scare him away. I'm sad and disappointed that the person I like so much treats me like this but knowing that he likes me back is so nice. I will never learn. Should I just wait? What should I do? If he was busy, would he be so busy that he couldn't even send a text message? I guess "he's just not into me" Link to post Share on other sites
Geishawhelk Posted December 26, 2008 Share Posted December 26, 2008 You're learning.....! Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted December 26, 2008 Share Posted December 26, 2008 It didn't and he never explained why it didn't. He called all the shots and I let him because I liked him too much. I will never learn. You know what? Sometimes guys are full of it. They say they want a woman who follows and yet, when she does follow, all of a sudden she's no longer of interest. So, now you know what to do for the next guy you like or crush on. Retain your independence and self! As for the non-explanation, it provides the guy with two things. He can always come back for more without finality AND he can also avoid the drama of an honest explanation. So, once again, for the next guy, you know what to do. If he pulls something you don't like, don't be afraid to assert yourself. I moved on eventually because I thought he wasn't into me. A year later he contacted me and wanted to see me again. He showed me that he still liked me. We went out then I never heard from him again. I don't understand why it is so difficult for him to tell me what he wanted. I wanted answers but didn't want to scare him away. I'm sad and disappointed that the person I like so much treats me like this but knowing that he likes me back is so nice. I will never learn.While I understand what it's like to like someone enough to go out with them again, this guy isn't that into you. If he was, he wouldn't be pulling these kinds of stunts. Should I just wait? What should I do? If he was busy, would he be so busy that he couldn't even send a text message? I guess "he's just not into me"Don't wait, don't do anything beyond moving on. He'll contact again. When he does, turn him down and walk. Go find a guy who's really into you, not someone filling in time. Link to post Share on other sites
BKLovesWho Posted December 28, 2008 Share Posted December 28, 2008 Some Guys are terrified because of all the emotions going on about a person they love. Some just can't put things into persepective. Loving someone is scary and hard. Don't listen to those who are soured on men that leads to the dark side. The best way is just romatically ask him "Do you love me?" Don't blare it out he may just be afraid you may say no.... Guys aren't obligated to say I love you first. Women need to stop talking to each other and reinforcing male sterio types. It's almost 2009 already!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Island Girl Posted December 28, 2008 Share Posted December 28, 2008 I read a book titled "He's just not into you" and it said if a guy doesn't call you then "he's just not into you." That was exactly what happened between a guy who I dated briefly and me, I thought. I had the longest crush on him and when we finally dated I thought it would last. It didn't and he never explained why it didn't. He called all the shots and I let him because I liked him too much. I will never learn. I moved on eventually because I thought he wasn't into me. A year later he contacted me and wanted to see me again. He showed me that he still liked me. We went out then I never heard from him again. I don't understand why it is so difficult for him to tell me what he wanted. I wanted answers but didn't want to scare him away. I'm sad and disappointed that the person I like so much treats me like this but knowing that he likes me back is so nice. I will never learn. Should I just wait? What should I do? If he was busy, would he be so busy that he couldn't even send a text message? I guess "he's just not into me" You may have had a crush on him for good reason - good looking, nice, etc. But he has clearly shown he is inconsiderate and not good relationship material. Communication is key in any relationship and he has shown that he is unable or unwilling to share very crucial information with you. He should have explained with you his reasons for breaking it off the first time. Even if it was nothing to do with you, he could have spoken with you about it. And when he contacted you again, after the initial commentaries about how each of you are etc., I am surprised you didn't put that out there and get an answer before going out with him again. I definitely would have. But to go out with him again and then to be suddenly put in isolation again should let you know he isn't as great as you thin he is. He is sadly lacking in basic courtesy and respect. It is hurtful and completely unfair especially since he reached out to you in the first place. I'd forget about him and move on. You said you are feeling sad and disappointed. Why stay pining for someone whose actions cause you to feel that way? I would also say you could raise your standards of how you should be treated and write off the men who do things like this. After all you are not asking for much. Just mature communication and very basic respect. It's not like you are being a Diva. Link to post Share on other sites
You'reasian Posted December 29, 2008 Share Posted December 29, 2008 I read a book titled "He's just not into you" and it said if a guy doesn't call you then "he's just not into you." That was exactly what happened between a guy who I dated briefly and me, I thought. I had the longest crush on him and when we finally dated I thought it would last. It didn't and he never explained why it didn't. He called all the shots and I let him because I liked him too much. I will never learn. I moved on eventually because I thought he wasn't into me. A year later he contacted me and wanted to see me again. He showed me that he still liked me. We went out then I never heard from him again. I don't understand why it is so difficult for him to tell me what he wanted. I wanted answers but didn't want to scare him away. I'm sad and disappointed that the person I like so much treats me like this but knowing that he likes me back is so nice. I will never learn. Should I just wait? What should I do? If he was busy, would he be so busy that he couldn't even send a text message? I guess "he's just not into me" How about if a guy calls you and you never pick up? You're just not into him but are into the guy that never calls you lol Link to post Share on other sites
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