i am so confused

[Gem]

over the last few months, the relationship with my boyfriend has been fading away. He has started working shifts so is either really tiered or i dont see him. He works in a factory. in the last few months there have been rumours going around work about him fancying one girl, and kissing to others, this really hurts because lately he hasnt really bothered with me much, as in kissing n stuff. I believe him that he is telling the truth, but there is a little bit of doubt.

 

we have been together for two years and seven months, i dearly love him to bits, but monday i decided that I had to finish with him because i have been so unhappy. Every time i want to talk about anything to him, concerning the relationship he said i was nagging, but i wasnt I just wanted to sort things out. Because we wasnt talking i just couldnt cope anymore. I felt that all of his friends in work were laughing at me cos of the rumours and all my freinds thought he was a liar.

 

I decided that it would be good to have a fresh start, but I really miss him even though it has only been a few days.

 

I went out last night and saw him with his friends from work. He was laughing with the one girl and I got really jealous. I had a right go at her, she really didnt deserve, they all think I am a bitch now, i just went green eyed thoguh and was very drunk at the time. I feel so bad because normally i am nice to everyone, I just didnt like the thought of him with someone else, it hurts so bad, but to make things worse I ended up kissing a bloke then last night, it didnt mean anything, but i feel like such a hypocrite. I want to be with him so bad but i feel like everything has all been ruined, i know he love me to bits, but all we was doing was arguing. I am so confused about how to deal with this, I hope to get back with him in the future but now need a break, I am so jealous of thinking of him with other girls.

 

please help me so my head out

 

I am 18.

[Verlan]

Your reactions are pretty normal for an 18-year-old lady. You did not say how old your ex was but it would seem reasonable to assume is near your age.

 

A guy of 18-plus has a lot of growing up to do and is seldom emotionally prepared to commit to one person. I doubt you are either. However, it is perfectly human and normal to miss someone you have been seeing for over 2 1/2 years. And it would be normal to get upset when seeing him with other ladies.

 

I urge you to stay away from him if at all possible. Avoid the places he goes. In time, you will get over him and, if I were a betting man, I would wager that you will just get him off your mind you will find another super love in reasonable time.

 

I would also advise you when you feel ready to date lots of different guys and find one that is really special.

 

You will miss your ex for a while and I hope you will treasure those years. But moving on is one of those things in life we must do and it is horrendously painful at times.

 

If you hang out and purposely follow your ex or go to places he frequences, your likely to find yourself with your heart ripped apartment. Why would you want to do that to yourself?

 

Also, the more you make a scene around him when you see him, the more you show him he's better off without a realtionship with you...and is that what you want to show him? Be kind, understand, and most gracious around him and his ladies and he will respect your for that...and wonder where your head is? That's good.