Jump to content

Initiating a breakup , changing mind afterwards, then getting turned down


Ratherunique

Recommended Posts

Has anyone here ever initiate the break up, only to change your mind later that day or week, reconcile and then get turned down and feel rejected?

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

That sucks dude.....next time, I must mean what I say and say what I mean. Credibility is lost when one doesn't stick to their word.....

Link to post
Share on other sites

Well you don't really know what you have till you lost it.

It was a very hard lesson to learn.

 

It seems like quite a long time ago now, and feels rather silly to think about her in a romantic way after this time. It doesn't bother me too much now - sure she may still pop into my head now and again, but it doesn't hurt anymore. As i said in another post she got in touch on Christmas but i chose to ignore it, simply because it's been so long since we have spoken that i really wouldn't know what to say. It would be like talking with a stranger now.

 

So what made you make that decision to finish it?

And why do you think that the other person did not want to reconcile?

Link to post
Share on other sites

I've seen this happen A LOT.

 

With guys it tends to happen when they feel sophicated in a relationship but then get lonely once it's over.

 

The same thing can happen with girls but I've also noticed that sometimes that some seem to use threatening to break up or breaking up for just a day as a way to get a guy to give in and then get surprised when the relationship actually dies.

Link to post
Share on other sites

 

With guys it tends to happen when they feel sophicated in a relationship but then get lonely once it's over.

 

Yes. For me it wasn't suffocation it was complacency. I had an attitude to it in my head where i thought if she leaves so what because i can take it or leave it. As soon as it was gone though - OUCH.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

No lie....my last ex was no good...but damn she was hot and the sex was damn good.....I think that's what I'm missing. But, oh well back to the rat race. Back to the bars, clubs, bbq's. That's what I hate about the single life.....I gotta grind again. WHAT A PAIN IN THE ASS....lol

Link to post
Share on other sites
http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t174354/

 

Above is my post earlier. Kinda wordy, but it sums up my situation. Relationships are psychological warfare in some cases...

 

I just read that.

The distance thing... The thing i have learn t is if there's been distance, you can't jump straight back in. You have to work on it slowly, even pull away slightly yourself to initiate them pulling you in - otherwise you end up pushing too hard... and ultimately pushing them away. No one likes to feel pressured. It's relationship suicide.

Link to post
Share on other sites
No lie....my last ex was no good...but damn she was hot and the sex was damn good.....I think that's what I'm missing. But, oh well back to the rat race. Back to the bars, clubs, bbq's. That's what I hate about the single life.....I gotta grind again. WHAT A PAIN IN THE ASS....lol

 

Know how you feel. Not only have I had to deal with dating again, I know have baggage from my previous relationship. The sex stuff is especially annoying since my EX always felt we slept together too fast and thus I must not have respected her (even though we were together for almost three years after and I was always faithful). Now, every time I get close to sleeping with someone, I suddenly get frightened that they'll regret it in the morning and feel like I used them.

Link to post
Share on other sites
  • Author

Roghornio.....I definitely pushed hard after the last incident.....

Think about it, I haven't seen her for 2 weeks. She complains that I created this big space..she wants to spend more time blah blah blah. She even complained that I don't stay on the phone long enough with her. I offer to come by since it has been 2 weeks and she gives me every excuse not to come by. I know I was supposed to see her the following day, but I just knew something wasn't right. Bottom line: if a female is really into you it shouldn't matter if I'm just droppin in because I'm working in the area. She gave me like 5 or 6 excuses and they all didn't make any sense. If she 's at happy hour with co-workers or what ever...if I'm just poppin in to say hi, In my books I don't think their should be a problem. I think she probably was also takin interest in someone at her job.

Link to post
Share on other sites
Roghornio.....I definitely pushed hard after the last incident.....

Think about it, I haven't seen her for 2 weeks. She complains that I created this big space..she wants to spend more time blah blah blah. She even complained that I don't stay on the phone long enough with her. I offer to come by since it has been 2 weeks and she gives me every excuse not to come by. I know I was supposed to see her the following day, but I just knew something wasn't right. Bottom line: if a female is really into you it shouldn't matter if I'm just droppin in because I'm working in the area. She gave me like 5 or 6 excuses and they all didn't make any sense. If she 's at happy hour with co-workers or what ever...if I'm just poppin in to say hi, In my books I don't think their should be a problem. I think she probably was also takin interest in someone at her job.

 

Perhaps. Though more likely she was just making up excuses as reasons why she couldn't see you.

 

Well you've learned your lessons here - next time you know how to handle this kind of situation and pushing to see her after she blows you out is not the option. She blows you out... don;t chase - make her come after you, and if she doesn't... Well if she's really into you, you want have that problem!

Link to post
Share on other sites
×
×
  • Create New...