Choosing to travel over pursuing a relationship

[amazing_grace]

Ok, I have never actually written an online post however have exhausted all my current go-to's & figured I have nothing to lose (& hopefully advice to gain). Here's my story...

 

I met a boy last year when I was randomly out one night, we actually knew of each other (through mutual friends) but had never spoken to one another. At this point I was planning on moving to the UK in three months time so saw him as nothing more than a little fun. Our friendship progressed & we started spending a lot of time together (twice a week or sometimes more), it started out as more of a physical fling than anything however in time we got to know each other & became close. We enjoyed dinners, movies & beers in the sun, we spoke about our futures, my travelling anxieties & had an incredible sex life (& lots of cuddling!). Three months passed & before I knew it I was on a plane to London. The boy had written me a lovely letter for my long plane trip expressing how much fun he had being with me & how one day (when I return home) he hopes we rekindle our romance. So, London didn't quite work out as planned - lack of jobs, bad travelling partner & missing the boy & my family took it's toll & I was back on Aussie soil within six weeks. The boy picked me up from the Airport & it felt wonderful being in those arms again.

 

But things changed. I guess I was expecting that because I was home now we could take our relationship to a deeper level but I was wrong. Even though we spent as much time together as we used to nothing was moving forward. He'd do things on the weekend without passing on an invite & I'd be left dwelling asking why. Then the twist comes - now he has decided to go overseas in April (argh!). I know he had talked about it in the past but I guess I was so consumed in my own plans I didn't take enough notice.

 

I decided tonight I would confront him & lay my heart on the table. I told him I cared for him & wished we could have taken our relationship further. He said he 'needs' to go to the States before he settles - that it's just something he 'has' to do. He apologised for 'leading me on' (dagger to the heart that one) & we decided to let go of our casual relationship & just be friends.

 

I am heart-broken. Before I went overseas I had met someone who really intrigued me, someone who made me laugh, cry & think about all the time. When I was overseas & it wasn't working out he told me 'Don't worry baby, travelling's not for everyone - come home & come with me next year' - a remark he tonight told me he doesn't even remember saying.

 

Did I read into something that wasn't really there?

 

I already miss him & it's going to be a tough few weeks trying to get past the rejection. Any advice, clarity or feel good tips would be appreciated.

[Pinkstar7896]

To me it seems like he was just in it for the ride. He probably did have alot of fun with you as well those three mths before you left but maybe thats why it was soo much fun for him because he knew your were going to leave and he knew there was no way the relationship could go further than 3 mths.

 

Now when you came back didn't you see the diffrence?? He didn't expect for you to come back so soon so now when you tried to have a real relationship hes stuck in his lies that he told you about him wanting you to come home & going w.him to the states..

 

I think you should just let him go & yea it's gonna hurt but if it's meant to be You'll bump into him again one day after he comes back and you can finally finish what you both started.

[You'reasian]

Are your wires crossed? ....never mind.

 

If he's going overseas, ask if you can go with. That'd be hella fun!