PrettyOdd Posted January 12, 2009 Share Posted January 12, 2009 (Directed towards OP's original question...) I have often been accused of being a "judgemental" person. I, on the other hand, see myself as a person who tries to love everyone and give them the benefit of the doubt, even when my "gut" says otherwise. As a result, I have gotten hurt many times, as well as hurting others because there is some fundamental rift in personality/values/beliefs etc. So....I have learned not to label people or stiuations as "bad" whenever my gut kicks in and tells me to run fast and far. I have had this happen on many occasions. Friends and family wonder why I am not on the love train when my gut instinct tells me the opposite of what they feel. I have learned to simply say... "even though I see a lot of positive attributes in said person/situation (and I am not being insincere, I can always find something good to say) ,there are fundamental value/lifestyle/personality/goal/interest conflicts that make me uncomfortable, so please don't ask me to love said person/situation/thing the way that you do." I don't want to negate their experience with the person or situation, but I do not want to ignore my own gut feeling at the same time. I have used derogatory words in the past to describe someone or something that I have a negative gut feeling about, but those words demean others as well as myself. In conclusion, I feel that gut instinct and intuition are good things, as long as we do not turn those things into value judgements that we expect others to abide by. I am not perfect, I still make judgements. My judgements, and everyone else's, are not in and of themselves are "right" or "wrong", they are simply the filter of our own experience with the world, and everyone's experiences are subjective. I ramble too much. I can never find the right words to express my feelings . I hope that I have added something to this discussion. Link to post Share on other sites
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