rainbowbrite Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 I keep reading on this site about the NC thing...like u need to give your guy time to miss you. like thats cool and all. i agree with that, its common sense. but i mean, i actually don't really think that they miss you at all.... guys do you ever think about your exes? Link to post Share on other sites
emotionalydistraugt Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 Well I wasn't think about her till I read this. Most of the guys on this site are on here so that we figure out how to stop thinking about our ex's. No matter what they did to us we still care about them and think about them Link to post Share on other sites
Ty Wanabu Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 Been NC for one month. Initiated by me (changed my cell phone number). I think about her every minute of every day!!! Last thought at night...first thought in the morning!! OK. Link to post Share on other sites
Author rainbowbrite Posted January 7, 2009 Author Share Posted January 7, 2009 hmm maybe i should specify...what if the guy broke up with his gf tho. cuz thats what happened to me. like does it bother them at all? Link to post Share on other sites
not_a_happy_camper Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 ok, here's an additional part to that question.......................do the guys who DUMPED their girlfriends still think of them? curious.................wondering is my ex still thinking about me...............probably isn't........ Link to post Share on other sites
mm4184 Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 my ex broke up with me. but he was the one who initiated contact at first because he missed me and wanted to know how i was doing etc. in the beginning, i think it's more of their guilt of leaving you so they want to make sure you're ok. after awhile, he told me he does think about me, but he's happy. (we broke up september) according to him, "it's ALREADY been almost 4 months" but to ME "it's ONLY been almost 4 months" so the difference is we think about them all the time.. i'm sure they think of us.. but according to my ex, he knows how to keep busy and has lots of work and hobbies to keep him distracted so it's easier for him. AND easier because he's the one who broke up with me. and he's been through it before.. i haven't.. not to this extreme at least. Link to post Share on other sites
Ty Wanabu Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 hmm maybe i should specify...what if the guy broke up with his gf tho. cuz thats what happened to me. like does it bother them at all? Depends on reason. If out of anger (ie. argument, disagreement)...then, yes, after anger subsides. If not in love anymore...then, no. Link to post Share on other sites
BCCA Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 Well, when you break up with someone, youre doing so because you feel like there is something better for you out there. No one leaves someone because theyre perfectly happy. With that said, they may miss you, but not in the way you miss them. Guilt probably plays a big part in it. For me personally, I always wished my ex was doing well, but I didnt miss her in the 'i wish we were still together' way, if that makes any sense. I hope she's found someone else and is living a happy life, but the ex Im talking about - I broke up with about 6.5 years ago, and never thought to contact her again. Not because I wanted to be cold, but because its selfish to keep her on the hook and lead her on. It's like the way you miss your friends when you dont see them for a while. Link to post Share on other sites
starzphalling Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 one of the guys i broke up with i didn't miss, and i never contacted. i was stupid, and kinda feel guilty about that one though. he was a complete rebound to my ltr ex. once i realized it i ended the relationship. i never called/wrote him again. he tried to call a few times, and wrote me once in a while for a year. i never answered a single one because i knew how it felt to be strung along, and i knew i would never be with this guy again. not because he was a bad guy, just cause i really had no feelings in that way for him. if there had ever been another chance i probably would have responded, but i knew there wasn't, so i thought it was nicer to ignore him than to give him any hope....wow that sounds horrible, but its true. Link to post Share on other sites
confused_2008 Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 Yes, I ended it with a girl I was seeing for a dumb reason and I miss her all the time. There's a lot more things that would factor into who misses who than gender, though. You have to be desperate right now to be even asking this question, so start asking some more important questions than this if you need help. Link to post Share on other sites
not_a_happy_camper Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 my ex broke up with me. but he was the one who initiated contact at first because he missed me and wanted to know how i was doing etc. in the beginning, i think it's more of their guilt of leaving you so they want to make sure you're ok. after awhile, he told me he does think about me, but he's happy. (we broke up september) according to him, "it's ALREADY been almost 4 months" but to ME "it's ONLY been almost 4 months" so the difference is we think about them all the time.. i'm sure they think of us.. but according to my ex, he knows how to keep busy and has lots of work and hobbies to keep him distracted so it's easier for him. AND easier because he's the one who broke up with me. and he's been through it before.. i haven't.. not to this extreme at least. SNAP. i have no job, and little to do to keep myself distracted. i have been trying. but i bet my ex isn't thinking over me. my first relationship too, his second. but i did hear from a mutual friend that he has found this one way harder than the last (he was with her 3 years, me a year and a half), he said there is no comparison. guess i meant more than i thought.........still not much consolation Link to post Share on other sites
Phateless Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 yes we do. Link to post Share on other sites
Ezekiel1337 Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 I desperately miss mine.... Link to post Share on other sites
starzphalling Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 then why don't you call us!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
not_a_happy_camper Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 then why don't you call us!!!! yeah, why don't you call us?!!! Link to post Share on other sites
loveleen Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 in my opinion, it seems like they do miss us but since they are the dumpERs they have too much pride to actually show us that they miss us or have the need to talk to us because it was their idea to break up and cut us out in the first place! i hope that made sense. haha Link to post Share on other sites
not_a_happy_camper Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 it does make sense. it's probably true for a certain percentage. if so, i wish my ex was in that percentage, and that he's swallow his freakin pride! Link to post Share on other sites
BCCA Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 If hes completely over the relationship, believe me, you want him to leave you alone for a LONG time. You dont want him leading you on or pulling your heart strings. I know we all want our ex's to contact us and tell us they miss us, but then youll make yourself crazy all over again, and probably start a "what does this mean" thread Let my ex stay as far away as possible. Link to post Share on other sites
EmperorR Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 They probably do but they won't show it. Link to post Share on other sites
Author rainbowbrite Posted January 7, 2009 Author Share Posted January 7, 2009 lol these posts made me feel better. the one thing i feel most awful about is the thought that i may think about this person, but they kinda forgot we existed in a way. but i must say, that he kept initiating contact, and stringing me along, and i got really annoyed by it. so i told him to never talk to me ever again. and i havent in around 2 months now. its been hard, but i kno its for the best. Link to post Share on other sites
audrey_1 Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 My ex actually used to tell me he missed his exes, and name them off. For example... "I miss Susan and Sharon and Sherry and Sophia - I miss every girl I spent significant time with, but I don't miss the relationships." The conversation came up, because his most recent ex created a Facebook account to find him (one of the aforementioned, except the names are fictitious). He was her first and only friend for a long time, and they filled up each other's walls with comments "catching up." I was like wtf? The entire time we were dating, he had a picture of her, him, his mom and dad on his dresser. He kept photos of each of them in his computer desk drawer. Yeah, I'd say there are guys out there who think about their exes...alot. Link to post Share on other sites
Author rainbowbrite Posted January 7, 2009 Author Share Posted January 7, 2009 My ex actually used to tell me he missed his exes, and name them off. For example... "I miss Susan and Sharon and Sherry and Sophia - I miss every girl I spent significant time with, but I don't miss the relationships." The conversation came up, because his most recent ex created a Facebook account to find him (one of the aforementioned, except the names are fictitious). He was her first and only friend for a long time, and they filled up each other's walls with comments "catching up." I was like wtf? The entire time we were dating, he had a picture of her, him, his mom and dad on his dresser. He kept photos of each of them in his computer desk drawer. Yeah, I'd say there are guys out there who think about their exes...alot. omg lol...i would be heated if i saw my bf and his ex blowen up eachothers walls Link to post Share on other sites
eiithan Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 but i must say, that he kept initiating contact, and stringing me along, and i got really annoyed by it. so i told him to never talk to me ever again. and i havent in around 2 months now. its been hard, but i kno its for the best. I second this. After 5 months NC I got a e-card saying "I want to call you to say hello and that I am thinking about you but I've been afraid to call you & this email would be a good way to start" from my ex of 2 years who broke with me and went to date/start a relationship with another girl. Only because a mutual guy friend insisted he seemed really eager to talk to me, I responded him to clarify his intentions so that I can decide whether I would talk to him again or not as friend. Of course, I never heard from him again. Shame on me to be ridiculed again, because this guy did the same thing 7 months ago. He emailed me he wanted to talk to me without problems then when I replied that we can start our friendship anew, a simple 'I will call you later' then I never heard anything until the Christmas card. I lost all my respect to this person I used to take so highly. And I have no intention to cross the way with this person again. I am sure my case is somewhat extreme, but an empty "I think about you" is worse than no news. It often does not mean anything other than the other person only thinking about him/herself. Link to post Share on other sites
RogueAC Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 I have to agree with what BCCA has said: they may miss you, but not in the way you miss them. If hes completely over the relationship, believe me, you want him to leave you alone for a LONG time. You dont want him leading you on or pulling your heart strings. I know we all want our ex's to contact us and tell us they miss us, but then youll make yourself crazy all over again, and probably start a "what does this mean" thread. Let my ex stay as far away as possible. Link to post Share on other sites
justletgo07 Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 I don't think gender really plays a part in whether or not your ex thinks about you. Odds are they do, but as others have said, they probably don't think about you in the way you would want, or as often. I think oftentimes exs start thinking about us after being broken up for a while, since the dumper's feelings of resentment and of being pressured often linger for a while. About 3 years ago I completely broke a girl's heart, and it was about a year later that I finally let myself feel the pain, regret, and guilt for what I'd done. I came across some pictures of us together, and just broke down. I wrote her a long letter of apology, but I don't think she ever got it. Link to post Share on other sites
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