electriclove Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 my ex broke up with me. but he was the one who initiated contact at first because he missed me and wanted to know how i was doing etc. in the beginning, i think it's more of their guilt of leaving you so they want to make sure you're ok. after awhile, he told me he does think about me, but he's happy. (we broke up september) according to him, "it's ALREADY been almost 4 months" but to ME "it's ONLY been almost 4 months" That's so true. I have the same attitude of 'its only been been 3 months how can I be over you'. Whereas from what I've seen and heard about my ex's life since the breakup it's more like ' its been over 3 months now why aren't you over this already'? My ex always said when we were together that if we did ever break up he would be a 'slow burner'. He said it wouldn't hit him right away but after some time has passed that's when it would hurt and he'd miss me. Obviously I'll probably never know whether this statement was true but I've got a good inclination right now to say he's full of bull! Saying that he has tried to contact me a few times since the break up, most recently this weekend and like a fool I answered. But like the above poster says I think he only did it to assuage his guilty conscience. He's having way too much fun to miss me. I hope one day all the crap I've been feeling the past 3 months hits him like a ton of bricks. Link to post Share on other sites
Jo78 Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 If you're doing NC so that he'll start missing you and regret the break up, you're doing it for the wrong reason. NC is about giving yourself time to heal without constantly being reminded of what you lost. Sometimes someone does try to come back after NC. That can be either because they really miss you and realized that they want to be with you. Or they are just hurt in their pride because you seem to move on so well without them. Either way, you should do NC just for yourself, and for no other reason. Also, what was the reason for the break up? Even if he does come back, the issue is most likely still present, too. Plus, it makes perfect sense when you break up with someone because you don't see things working out between you, but you then miss them, because you do still care about them. Breaking up is not always about not having feelings for someone anymore. Link to post Share on other sites
georgejungle Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 Yeah, i think about my ex's, but ONE in particular. She's the girl i thought was 'the one'. i was 150% madly, head over heels, crazy in love with her and she broke my heart because she felt she needed to be FREE while she was still young. I still think about her 10 years later, but i guess moreso lately because she tried contacting me a few months ago with an apology. After ALLLL these years, she contacts me just to tell me that she was sorry for breaking up with me and not trying harder to stay with me and that i'm the greatest guy and that she was dumb and naive, sorry that she hurt me, etc etc. So it just goes to show you that even SHE thought about ME all these years, even though she's the one that broke it off. i've thought about her and she's thought about me. Link to post Share on other sites
Nikki Sahagin Posted January 7, 2009 Share Posted January 7, 2009 When my boyfriend broke up with me (we are since back together) I didn't contact him at all. He kept trying to contact me and HE was the one asking if i'd been with anyone else or thought about him, he was the one actually THROWING UP at talking to me because of how much it hurt. So yes they DO think about you....but it varies in HOW they think about you. Do they think about you and feel a pang of regret, of guilt, or love, of sadness? Or do I think about you with relief? Or do they think about you like you think about an old friend in primary school? Link to post Share on other sites
LostLamb Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 I think my ex has probably forgotten my name by now. His family and feiends all hated me , it took weeks before he started new relationship (I guess the week before when he told me his heart was smashed and he didn't want anyone or anything was fiction) and the last time I saw him he could not look at me. I just hope I am not one of the unlucky ones who is lying on their death bed realising they had one chance in love and practically chased it away. Link to post Share on other sites
GloryDays Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 I'm wondering this too. He text me last Thursday and I haven't replied. I thought he might try again to contact me but he hasn't. Still somewhat regretting not responding to him and hoping I am making the right decision. However I just keep thinking...way too much. I want him to miss me so badly. Link to post Share on other sites
moveon Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 After 9 weeks of n/c, I thought that my ex has forgotten about me and moved on already, cause he didn't acknowledged my birthday and didn't respond to my Christmast greeting email/text, but recently, I saw he wrote I love you.... in his blog. I'm not sure if he miss me or what ? It's just so confused, sometimes don't know what guys are thinking..... Link to post Share on other sites
loveleen Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 im sad. i wish my ex would just call me gah tonight was a bad night. three weeks easy NC but now its getting to me! Link to post Share on other sites
Intergalactic Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 my ex told me today that he, and i quote, "really really misses me". we did nc for a while, i moved away, we started talking, we now talk every day. it isn't painful anymore, it doesn't make us really sad... i guess there's just a certain sense of longing. where does it get us? no where. it's not gonna happen, at least not right now.. maybe if we still "really really miss" each other in 5 years i might consider it. Link to post Share on other sites
vanilla87 Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 I keep reading on this site about the NC thing...like u need to give your guy time to miss you. like thats cool and all. i agree with that, its common sense. but i mean, i actually don't really think that they miss you at all.... guys do you ever think about your exes? Actually guys do miss their ex's, but only the ones that a) the girl broke up with him or b)he was deeply in love with her. Link to post Share on other sites
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