guys who dont pay

[Tomcat33]

Notice in this tribe how men win women over:

 

In the Mangyans syllabary, there are eighteen characters, three of which are vowels and the other fifteen characters are written combine those vowels. For writing materials, they use the siyaw or a bolo-shaped kinife for inscribing and the bamboo, either split or whole, for paper.

During merrymaking, the musical joust is the participated in both sexes. Gitgit, Kudyapi, Kinaban, all string instruments are usually played by men while those played by women are the lantuy (a bamboo flute), taghup or tanghup (a whistle made out of bamboo). Like the music, the ambahan (a poem of lines of seven syllables) has found its place as a tool for courting women.

Social life among the Hanunuos revolves around the family. Mangyan girls marry at an early age. During courtship, a young man convinces the girl of his intention through the use of ambahan. In between the recitations, he plays his subing, a three-star guitar. Marriage plans are done by both parents including the dowry. The actual wedding is short, the greater part consists of admonitions, and advises dispensed by a magdadniw a kind of minister.

 

 

As you can see that has nothing to do with feminism, equality in the work place or anyof the things some of you men confuse today. It has everything to with the fact that men are hunters women are gatherer/nurturers and intrinsically that is how we best relate in terms of romance.

So STFU and pay for the date if you want to be a respected man and taken seriously, el'cheapos :laugh:

[BareGoddess]

Well as long as you're not running around preaching that a modern man doesn't know how to treat his woman because he's good in the sack, then all is good.

 

Not exactly sure what you mean there but I'm sure that a modern man would know how to treat a modern woman. But he wouldn't know how to treat a traditionally-minded one.

 

Really, like I said, nothing wrong that. There's someone for everyone.

 

I'm not stupid enough to think that I'm every man's cup of tea either.

[BareGoddess]

Of course I support female equality in the workplace, and everywhere else.

 

So does that mean that if you have kids you'll take turns carrying the baby for 9 months and going through the pain of childbirth?

[The Collector]

Mangyan girls marry at an early age.

 

Shall we take our cues from the Magnyan tribe in this respect too? Perhaps they also take a light-hearted view of wife-beating and put the women in separate huts when they have their periods. But you want to pick and choose what traditions suit you, I get that.

[mr.dream merchant]

Notice in this tribe how men win women over:

 

 

 

 

As you can see that has nothing to do with feminism, equality in the work place or anyof the things some of you men confuse today. It has everything to with the fact that men are hunters women are gatherer/nurturers and intrinsically that is how we best relate in terms of romance.

So STFU and pay for the date if you want to be a respected man and taken seriously, el'cheapos :laugh:

 

Shouldn't you be heckling your husband for being a womanizer because you enjoyed his sex so much?

[CommitmentPhobe]

I'm starting to wonder if women who will only date men that pay will only have sex in the missionary position with the lights off.

[BareGoddess]

put the women in separate huts when they have their periods

 

My husband threatens to do that every month! He's such a kidder...(at least I think he was kidding..hmmm)

[BareGoddess]

I'm starting to wonder if women who will only date men that pay will only have sex in the missionary position with the lights off.

 

Not me, honey. I don't even like missionary!

 

Anyway, this is kind of silly. I mean many have said that they don't let their guys pay every single time. Only at the beginning. That's how it was for me.

 

Trust me, financially I went over and beyond the norm since his ex-wife wiped him out and he had almost nothing when we met and married. I helped him out a couple of times. And later, I paid for our honeymoon.

 

Financially I've certainly contributed my fair share over the years.

 

I think most of us are only talking about in the very early stages of dating/courting.

 

Trust me, most of us aren't goldiggers. That's a sad mentality if that's what some of you think.

[CommitmentPhobe]

Trust me, financially I went over and beyond the norm since his ex-wife wiped him out and he had almost nothing when we met and married. I helped him out a couple of times. And later, I paid for our honeymoon.

 

That's funny. For me, it's the other way around. I mean what sense does that make? I mean my ex fiancee we used to go out for drinks in the beggining so no $20 meals, but I bought her a $30K car for her birthday. I'm sure she preferred the car over the meals, I'll have to ask her.

[BareGoddess]

That's funny. For me, it's the other way around. I mean what sense does that make? I mean my ex fiancee we used to go out for drinks in the beggining so no $20 meals, but I bought her a $30K car for her birthday. I'm sure she preferred the car over the meals, I'll have to ask her.

 

What do you mean "it's the other way around?" Do you mean that she treated you with the smaller stuff and you bought the big ticket items? Not really sure I'm following you.

 

Anyway, my H and I were never one to be "score-keepers" as far as finances are concerned. He contributed. I contributed. Sometime it was uneven, yeah. Sometimes I was paying more for things and sometimes he was. We didn't let all of that define what we had. No one was taking advantage of anyone..then or now.

 

We always looked at each other as a TEAM. Sometimes one teammate contributes more than another. If it's ALWAYS lopsided to one side's advantage, THEN you've got a problem. You've got to look at the big picture.

[CommitmentPhobe]

What do you mean "it's the other way around?" Do you mean that she treated you with the smaller stuff and you bought the big ticket items? Not really sure I'm following you.

 

Anyway, my H and I were never one to be "score-keepers" as far as finances are concerned. He contributed. I contributed. Sometime it was uneven, yeah. Sometimes I was paying more for things and sometimes he was. We didn't let all of that define what we had. No one was taking advantage of anyone..then or now.

 

We always looked at each other as a TEAM. Sometimes one teammate contributes more than another. If it's ALWAYS lopsided to one side's advantage, THEN you've got a problem. You've got to look at the big picture.

 

 

It's the other way around in as far as I refuse to do an oudtated stuffy and pointless ritual, yet I'm just a wealthy guy that can provide better than about 99% of other males.

 

What is the point of a ritual where the guy shows an ability to provide if the guy can't actually provide? If the courtship process is to filter then how on earth does paying for a date come into it if they guy is flat broke? I just don't get it. Where's the tradition in that?

 

Maybe it's because I have money that I find it distasteful to try and impress someone by paying for their meal.

[BareGoddess]

It's the other way around in as far as I refuse to do an oudtated stuffy and pointless ritual, yet I'm just a wealthy guy that can provide better than about 99% of other males.

 

What is the point of a ritual where the guy shows an ability to provide if the guy can't actually provide? If the courtship process is to filter then how on earth does paying for a date come into it if they guy is flat broke? I just don't get it. Where's the tradition in that?

 

Maybe it's because I have money that I find it distasteful to try and impress someone by paying for their meal.

 

 

Ok, I see what you're saying. I guess for me it meant even MORE that he didn't really have much money but yet still wanted to treat me like a woman and treat me well.

 

Trust me, after I knew his situation after a few dates, I put a stop to the concerts and nice dinners out. I took him out, I made him dinner at my apt. and I made dinner at his house too. We rented movies at one of our places and ordered pizza. I was fine with that too.

 

Like I said it was the effort and thought that really told me what this guy was made of. It did contribute to my falling for him that's for sure.

 

So to some it's "outdated" and "stuffy" and to others it's being a gentleman in the traditional sense. I was a sucker for that. Like I said, it's not for all women. But it sure was for me!

 

By the way, to me it never had anything whatsoever to do with whether he was a good provider. Others have said that..not me. It had to do with whether he was considerate...with whether he was traditional..with whether he cared about what I think. Now THAT'S a true test for me. And he passed it with flying colors.

 

And I was right about him. He's still that same guy all these years later.

 

Edited to add that by the way, he does VERY well for himself. A guy who wants to please his wife and family (like he wanted to please me in the beginning) usually does end up doing well financially. And he has.

[Tomcat33]

Shall we take our cues from the Magnyan tribe in this respect too? Perhaps they also take a light-hearted view of wife-beating and put the women in separate huts when they have their periods. But you want to pick and choose what traditions suit you, I get that.

 

 

No we should not, you are missing the point I am not bringing up that example as a way of life I am simply pointing out that the premise of a man "winning" a woman over in courtship is a universal notion that is irrelevant to other customary practices such as economic stature or gender roles in the work force.

It carries over to all sorts of different cultures with the same running theme in common.

 

In ancient Roman culture the women would accentuate their eyes with coal to emphasize their level of interest in their objects of desire because it is said that dialated pupils is a sign of attraction or lust. Women started wearing makeup to attract men based on that.

I can share that tid bit of history with you but that doesn't mean I want three men thrown into a court to wrestle down lions for my love, does that make me nit picky? Civilization took care of certain tendencies and abollished those that were deemed as barbaric and fine tuned others that actually work in the mating ritual. If body adornments and make-up for women didn't work we wouldn't use it.

 

A man treating a woman to an outing when trying to win her over WORKS.

 

Now if you are not looking to win a woman over then don't, treat her as one of the guys and away you go in your same sex union.

[Tomcat33]

I'm starting to wonder if women who will only date men that pay will only have sex in the missionary position with the lights off.

 

 

You'll never know.

[CommitmentPhobe]

Ok, I see what you're saying. I guess for me it meant even MORE that he didn't really have much money but yet still wanted to treat me like a woman and treat me well.

 

Trust me, after I knew his situation after a few dates, I put a stop to the concerts and nice dinners out. I took him out, I made him dinner at my apt. and I made dinner at his house too. We rented movies at one of our places and ordered pizza. I was fine with that too.

 

Like I said it was the effort and thought that really told me what this guy was made of. It did contribute to my falling for him that's for sure.

 

So to some it's "outdated" and "stuffy" and to others it's being a gentleman in the traditional sense. I was a sucker for that. Like I said, it's not for all women. But it sure was for me!

 

By the way, to me it never had anything whatsoever to do with whether he was a good provider. Others have said that..not me. It had to do with whether he was considerate...with whether he was traditional..with whether he cared about what I think. Now THAT'S a true test for me. And he passed it with flying colors.

 

And I was right about him. He's still that same guy all these years later.

 

Edited to add that by the way, he does VERY well for himself. A guy who wants to please his wife and family (like he wanted to please me in the beginning) usually does end up doing well financially. And he has.

 

 

I see what you're saying

 

If you want traditional male/female role assigment then I guess you want the traditional ritual too

 

Me, I'm happy to go 50/50 on everything, bills, cooking cleaning, whatever. I'm also happy to treat my partner, what I refuse to do is go through a process that to me stifles everything. I always feel if I'm paying for something then I'm wanted for the wrong reasons. I want to be wanted because A)I'm a fantastic person B)I'm hot and C)I'm great in the sack. The rest can follow. The fact that I'm loaded and a good provider just shouldn't come into it.

 

Different strokes.

 

What bugs me is when someone comes on here and starts going on about status and sluts and nonsense. Some people just dig at men at every opportunity.

[BareGoddess]

Even some ANIMALS know better!

 

Look at this about some bird called the bower bird found in Australia and New Guinea:

 

The male bower bird tries to entice the female into a straw hut decorated with all sorts of items, preferrably matching the blue of his feathering.

Appart from traditional decoratory items, such as shells or berries, the modern bower bird likes clothespins, plastic caps and all sorts of strips and shreds of consumer culture. If an object is moved while Mr Bird is out at a collector's fair, he puts it back in its place. Miss Bower walks around, carefully assessing each bower, considering everything from the color coordination to the rarity of the items, including the overall artistic significance and what that might say about Bob Bower. Finally, many females mate with the same male, leaving everybody else in artistic squalor and torment.

 

Those gold digging bowers!

[CommitmentPhobe]

No we should not, you are missing the point I am not bringing up that example as a way of life I am simply pointing out that the premise of a man "winning" a woman over in courtship is a universal notion that is irrelevant to other customary practices such as economic stature or gender roles in the work force.

.

 

There's also a universal notion of women chucking themseles at fanciable men. George Clooney wants to go dutch on drinks you'd praise him for his sense of equality and fresh approach to dating.

[Tomcat33]

Those gold digging bowers!

 

 

:lmao:

 

 

Interesting note not all that surprising that in the animal kingdom mating rituals involve the male species proving his worthiness to the female species.

[BareGoddess]

I see what you're saying

 

If you want traditional male/female role assigment then I guess you want the traditional ritual too

 

Me, I'm happy to go 50/50 on everything, bills, cooking cleaning, whatever. I'm also happy to treat my partner, what I refuse to do is go through a process that to me stifles everything. I always feel if I'm paying for something then I'm wanted for the wrong reasons. I want to be wanted because A)I'm a fantastic person B)I'm hot and C)I'm great in the sack. The rest can follow. The fact that I'm loaded and a good provider just shouldn't come into it.

 

Different strokes.

 

What bugs me is when someone comes on here and starts going on about status and sluts and nonsense. Some people just dig at men at every opportunity.

 

I agree with the last part. No one should do that. Men dig at women on here all the time. It's not right either way.

 

Can't you still pay for your dates at the beginning and still end up knowing her true character and where her heart lies? Don't you trust your judgement? Don't you think you'd know if she was into you for more than what you can provide financially?

 

As for our roles, they haven't always been traditional. Roles have changed over the years. We havent always been that strictly "traditional" in that sense. I guess it's just more of an attitude that I'm describing..yes attitude and behavior more than it is about "roles."

[CommitmentPhobe]

I agree with the last part. No one should do that. Men dig at women on here all the time. It's not right either way.

 

Can't you still pay for your dates at the beginning and still end up knowing her true character and where her heart lies? Don't you trust your judgement? Don't you think you'd know if she was into you for more than what you can provide financially?

."

 

Point is I don't need to, some women also find it a stuffy process and that's my type.

[BareGoddess]

:lmao:

 

 

Interesting note not all that surprising that in the animal kingdom mating rituals involve the male species proving his worthiness to the female species.

 

Exactly. You see it a lot. I just chose that one as an example because I thought it was fun. I loved that last line

Finally, many females mate with the same male, leaving everybody else in artistic squalor and torment.

Yeah, and the others come and post on LS complaining about how shallow and hypocritical women are.

 

(Yeah the gold digging line was mine though! )

[Tomcat33]

There's also a universal notion of women chucking themseles at fanciable men. George Clooney wants to go dutch on drinks you'd praise him for his sense of equality and fresh approach to dating.

 

 

Honey I CAN GUARANTEE YOU and I can bet my life on this: ESPECIALLY George Clooney does not cheap out on a date, he will pick up that tab every time even if he were a nobody, he strikes me as an old school boy YUM!

 

If he asked me out and wanted to go dutch I would be completely turned off I don't care if he is George Clooney, George the bartender or George of the Jungle. YUCK.

[BareGoddess]

Point is I don't need to, some women also find it a stuffy process and that's my type.

 

Ok, gotcha. That was my point really all along..someone for everyone.

[Tomcat33]

Point is I don't need to, some women also find it a stuffy process and that's my type.

 

 

Like I said, milk it now it won't last.

[CommitmentPhobe]

Like I said, milk it now it won't last.

 

I'm 33, it's lasted me with all sorts of women.

 

You either need to grow up or get out in the real world to see theres all different types of people with different tastes and theres no universal description of what "women" want. You seem to live on a forum where everything is neatly defined. Sorry it doesn't work like that. Either way you don't know half of what you think you know. I'd certainly be dissapointed if I paid for a date with a know it all bore that fits the world around them to their personal views.

 

Clooney is a commitmentphobe that beds a lot of women, so yes he is old school, and according to you he's a "garden variety man slut", but you seem to be conveniently ignoring that as well.