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Is he interested?


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Ok, here goes: I have this neighbor across the street from me who is very cute, and I've always had a secret crush on him. Well, one night I was suppose to go out with my niece, and she ditched me, so I mustered up the confidence to ask him if he wanted to go. To my suprise he said yes. Well, we drank, and drank, and he ended up kissing me. I wasn't even expecting it, because we had talked before, but never flirted or anything of the sort. And I understand we were both drinking, but it's still something I never expected. But anyway, we ended up going back to his house and making out some more, but we didn't do anything else. Then I decided I better go home. So ever since I haven't talked to him, but it's all I can think about. It bothered me so much that I wrote him a letter and stuck it in his mailbox (because I was too afraid to talk to him in person), but its been a few weeks and still no response. I know it probably meant nothing to him, and the alcohol was the factor in all this happening, but I just can't get these feelings for him to go away. What should I do? If I was absolutely sure he wasn't interested I wouldn't be feeling so strongly about it, maybe I just need to hear. "NO, I DON'T LIKE YOU", or something, but I feel that I have to find out for sure. Whether it be me just asking him straight out or something, I don't know. What should I do? Any advice? Thanks.

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Sounds like you guys may have gotten a bit ahead of yourselves. What did your letter say? Sounds like you both had a great time, but if the letter sounded too needy, apologetic, or assumed more involvement than he was thinking about, he may not know how to respond to it. And you've already set the tone of being the more aggressive of the two of you, for better or for worse.

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Well, the letter basically said that yes, I was sorry, I usually dont do things like that, but I wasn't TOO apologetic, and I said that I dont even know if he remembers anything but I did, and I liked it and wouldn't mind hanging out with him again. I just feel really stupid now having to live right across the street from him and writing that letter, I'm sure if he was interested he would have said something by now. Unless he's afraid to, who knows. I just can't help but have this overwhelming feeling like we need to "finish" something, or that the other night wasn't it, that there is something else there. But oh well. I guess only time will tell.

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I was afraid of that... sounds like it leaned to the needy and apologetic. You may get a chance in the future to hit a more joyful and confident tone with him, but I'd let this rest... because the alternative seems to be apologizing for being apologetic. "Closure" seems like an odd goal right now.

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