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your just a good friend to me


finkelstein

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as ive posted in a previous thread, i have or had ,by the lack of contact, a freind who seperated with another one of my friends. what a mess not only now do i have no people to hang with (due to the size of my town) me and this girl kinda had a thing goin and now ive entered her friend zone. which i guess is ok because of my personality (nice guy finish last bs) but i cant handle just being her friend. i mean every time i look at her i just wonder of the possibilites, but now when i see her my heart drops because none seem to be possible. so the question i have is is it possible and how can i move out of the just friend thing. id really appreciate any advise. constuctive critisim is good to.

your friend,

Fink

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It's about being yourself, and showing off your true character. If you have a strong character, don't keep it to yourself but manage to be polite and well spoken and well expressed...don't try and be nicer because you want to give her a nice impression. truth is, which human being who is good finishes last? the only ones trying to give a better impression than what they truly are because they are insecure.

If you like her, stop acting sweeter, or nicer, or better or whatever.

Don't care. Let her start knowing the real you I mean, has she ever seen you mad? about something...I mean, everybody gets mad sometimes.

Have you ever discussed a situation with someone and have you trusted her to be your listener?...I mean, does she really know you?.

cause...if she doesn't, you are tooo nice...or very self controlled and trying to fulfill your perfect man perspective and so she feels it and she doesn't feel yah. How can someone feel you if you are not beeing truthful to yourself?.

Just...be yourself, give it time.

Don't act as a moron, because morons don't end up with the intelligent girls. At last, intelligent girls get the worst and the best out of those lame people and try and search for a normal guy who is sexual. Because it is not about the strong character, or the bad boy...It's about, what appeals you sexually to a man.

You don't want a softy man because unconsciously you are perceiving a lame bed experience. I'm telling you.

If the attraction is there, you just have to be patient, outgoing, be yourself and someday just...Even take her out of her constant way of thinking about you, kiss her another way..I don't mean right in the mouth but, somehow beside the lip. You can provoke her a little. Subtly.

just do it.

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as ive posted in a previous thread, i have or had ,by the lack of contact, a freind who seperated with another one of my friends. what a mess not only now do i have no people to hang with (due to the size of my town) me and this girl kinda had a thing goin and now ive entered her friend zone. which i guess is ok because of my personality (nice guy finish last bs) but i cant handle just being her friend. i mean every time i look at her i just wonder of the possibilites, but now when i see her my heart drops because none seem to be possible. so the question i have is is it possible and how can i move out of the just friend thing. id really appreciate any advise. constuctive critisim is good to.

your friend,

Fink

 

Agreed. Don't look back, look forward. Be true to yourself, get out there and have some fun.

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sweetdevil, i just need to thank you straight out. ive tried asking some close family members and they just run on aboutthe importance of nuturing and kindness. for sure the best advise ive been given. ive been friend swith her for nine months and we do the same stuff daily. shes never really seen me mad but thats because im never really verbal when im angry, nor do i get fussy and sad, i just understand sh*t happens. and come to think i havnt even given her a reason to have her want me more then a friend. so ill def give it a shot, i mean things can only go up when you hit the bottem right.

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  • 2 weeks later...

well you know what? I just said that because..when I was like 18..I wanted everything to be perfect and the boy I liked to just love me and be amazed by my amazing personality, that I just...tried too much to make everything perfect..and , sometimes perfect is not that attractive, because it doesn't seem natural. I know now, that I am very sensitive, and even if I might be enthusiastic and against fighting because I just hate it.sometimes it is necessary, to relief stress and give yourself respect..I might have a strong character but, now...I know some boys like a woman who has strong character. How would I find a man who likes that, if I don't show it...and pretend I am perfectly sweet, and quiet and nice all the time and I don't feel sad, or angry or whatev sometimes..even if it is just, almost never.

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The Collector

My ex just had a work colleague she was quite good friends with confess he had feelings for her. Now it's made her so awkward and uncomfortable she can't talk to him, and he keeps following her around and sending emails, even though she asked him to give her some space.

 

So tread very carefully. Hint jokingly that someone said they though you were a couple and gauge her reaction. Never confess strong feelings. Why not suggest that you (or someone else) suspect her of having a little crush on you... if she says' yuk, never' forget about it and move on.

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but you know.....I don't agree...I mean, it's ok to understand you are not welcomed there, that way....but that doesn't mean, you can't be friends with that person being yourself and making yourself open up and try to make your prospective open up to you too and see you as you are...sometimes, those things evolve into something throughout time.....

my mother knows this chick...she hated a guy from the gym, I don't know why!!!...turns out, they both hated each other, didn't even knowing WHY..well, it turns out someone made them a blind date..and ended up being married. u never know.

might work, might not but it is always better to give it a shot.

not a maniac, stalker, type of an overwhelming pressuring kind of way to attract attention, but just layed back..

cool.....not giving it too much importance, focusing on your own life. and making this, just a 1% of a 99% of the rest of everything you have to do within your time to fulfill yourself.

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