Frankasy Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 Um I really don't know what's happened between you and your parents and I don't wanna get in the middle but I seem to have figured out one thing: You're 20 and from the way you made that post, it seems as if your parents still play a decent role in your life. I think it's time for you to separate from them if you're still attached to them so that you can make your own decisions without getting frustrated. Again I'm just assuming, I don't really know anything. Second of all don't talk like that about your parents, no matter what, they gave you life, remember that. If they knew that you'd turn up like this, maybe they would have never had you if you think about it. I repeat no matter what, parents are untouchable, remember that. Link to post Share on other sites
You'reasian Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 why the **** should i love them? they're evil and scummy people, i make it a habit not to admire people like that. I don't have to like or respect anybody, including family members. Am I being whiney and like a child? Perhaps I am. But I know where I stand and I hate them. If i ever have children, i wouldn't be this way with them at all. So you are frustrated with your parents. You'll have to chalk this up as growing pains - your parents love you, but obviously you are struggling with your independence and identity in your early 20's. Try to look at things from your parents perspective and see yourself through their eyes. Be thoughtful, have a little compassion - can you imagine being a parent? Seems like a lot of work and dedication, hoping only for the best and to have your child rebel and ignore them would be frustrating for you. Hear your parents out. Meet them half way. Link to post Share on other sites
quankanne Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 so basically, you're content to hold on to anger and disappointment from the past instead of reconciling with it? no parent is perfect, and yeah, they'll do things that'll piss you off until the day they die. The difference is, as you mature, you start seeing past your hurt and agner and figure out why they did such hateful, cruel stuff, and you learn to forgive the past because you understand that by holding on to it, you don't emotionally mature past that angry kid state and you risk the chance of becoming the kind of person they were to you. that's a heavy load to drag around the rest of your life. Do you really want to keep expending that much energy on your hate when you could be living otherwise? What makes their past behavior so import than you *must* hang on to it? Does it justify a miserable existence (yours, not theirs), or are you just too lazy to move on to the next stage in your life? this isn't meant to be unkind, but share what I've learned in my middle age. Because while some of the crap my dad did was not that of a good father, his faults just aren't that important make me miserable the rest of my life. Link to post Share on other sites
Author nana yaw II Posted January 13, 2009 Author Share Posted January 13, 2009 OK. I thank everyone for their input, and I admit i do sound a bit immature here. I'm just venting really, and I understand that I'm only hurting myself by being angry. Life is short, so we should be as positive as possible. Link to post Share on other sites
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