Would you fk someone for money?

[boxing123]

So what are the definitions oif these terms so often used?

 

 

How much money is "rich"

 

How much money is "wealthy"

 

What is a "decent " income?

 

What is also funny is how I so often read " I do not NEED a rich man". Like you have any choice.

 

And yes, I do feel success in relationships is defined by actually being in one, and making it last. Not serial dating.

[movingonandon]

Moving and boxing, really!

 

 

 

But you're hypocrites...you sure wouldn't settle for a sweet girl, intelligent girl who was a dog and didn't have the body type you prefer. Would you?

 

So why berate some of us for expressing our preferences?

 

 

ah, these threads are always such a joy! At some moment the point that whoever rants rants about certain attitude he or she believes they've observed, not about the perfectly loveable posters here becomes lost.

 

I think that boxing is a little harsh, but I also think that he has a point, which precisely because it is so unpopular, should be served with more restraint. But, that's the beauty of the internet.

 

How, for the hipocricy part: i think that that's uncalled for because my own position - and it seems boxing's too - is that the number 1 characteristic of a woman that will determine my willingness to marry her is her character/general personality qualities and traits. Sure, I need to be attracted to her (what relationships could survive without that???), but she does not need to be a model. In fact, I actually avoid women that are "10s" - it is not worth the trouble in the long run. My current girlfriend is a little more um... curvateous... than my ideal "preferences", but that would never prevent me from even possibly marrying her if she really turns out to be the nice person she seems to be.

 

So, that's not the same as calling a guy who makes 40k "broke" and making it a dealbreaker for a relationship. That's not having standards, that's entitlement .

[allina]

Do you know how insulting you are? Wow. Not that it bothers me, you just make yourself look bad. But let me see if I can clue you in, k?

 

I have no price. My "precious company" could be had for free (well when i was single anyway) if the guy had some couth and class and yep, intelligence oh and looks. That's pretty much all. If he wanted more, he'd need more than that even...like a sense of humor, honesty, good morals and values and yep, the ability to hold a job and make a decent living in addition to being fiscally responsible. Imagine that?

 

uhm, Collector most of the men I've dated (including the two I married) were/are ambitious and driven as you mentioned. But neither of the men I married were/are rich. Not at all. Like I said, yep they both make more than the average income...so? Am I to be labeled a golddigger now just because I didn't settle and expected a lot in ALL areas?

 

A golddigger settles don't they? They give up one thing for another, right? I din't have to. I love my man, with or without the good income he provides. (And FYI, for the first few years of our marriage our income was pretty bad...I helped pay his debts off from his first marriage as well as his college loan. I even paid for our honeymoon. )

 

Allina!!!! Yep, Mr. T is laughing at this too. I won't say what he just said for fear of offending the men-folk here.

 

And Allina, I hear you. If my H lost his income or got sick or something like that, God forbid, I would stand by him and keep us afloat. We've even discussed that. (We're weird that way...we talk about all kinds of doom and gloom scenarios and what we'd do.) No way in HELL would I ever leave him.

 

My H with zero income still would blow away any other average man with a huge income.

 

Completely agree The first thing my SO asked when hearing how that guy responded to me was "ah one of those bitter ones you have on your love forum?"

 

Hmmm...so your barometer for success is being married with children? Not mine. I have a lot of barometers of which happiness is my definition of success and right now, I'm pretty darn happy!

 

Not to mention the suggesting that not having a husband and/or child equates to having no family, wtf is that?

 

So what are the definitions oif these terms so often used?

 

 

How much money is "rich"

 

How much money is "wealthy"

 

What is a "decent " income?

 

What is also funny is how I so often read " I do not NEED a rich man". Like you have any choice.

 

And yes, I do feel success in relationships is defined by actually being in one, and making it last. Not serial dating.

 

Why do you want actual numbers so much? It's different depending on where you live. I just want someone who is well matched with me, someone I can buy my dram home with, someone I can vacation with, someone who values saving for a kid's education. Do you need to see where you measure up?

 

And my relationship is VERY successful, we couldn't be happier

[Dumbledore]

A lot of irrelevant arguments here. It's quite simple, really. Basic arithmetic. Life isn't 90% sex, as much as we would like it to be (I have at times come pretty close). Life is 10% sex (being generous here), and 90% bullcrap. So, wouldn't you sacrifice the 10%, when the 90% balance can be spent in complete and blissful comfort? Of course you would.

 

People born into privilege can afford to do what they like, but the rest of us have to get by selling our bodies, or prepare for a life of misery (misery means forgetting about the little luxuries that make life bearable, like home comforts, entertainment, and travel).

 

If you're a guy, then being rich gives you the pick of the best mates. You can have anybody you want, except the princess types who are already rich.

[BareGoddess]

ah, these threads are always such a joy! At some moment the point that whoever rants rants about certain attitude he or she believes they've observed, not about the perfectly loveable posters here becomes lost.

 

Huh? By the way, did I mention any guy I dated had to be articulate? NO effin' idea what the above meant...am I the only one?

 

I think that boxing is a little harsh, but I also think that he has a point, which precisely because it is so unpopular, should be served with more restraint. But, that's the beauty of the internet.

 

Uh, yeah. Wow, are you proving my point! No offense, sorry. Has anyone told you that you make zero sense? I need my man to make sense when he's debating with me. I'm weird that way.

 

How, for the hipocricy part: i think that that's uncalled for because my own position - and it seems boxing's too - is that the number 1 characteristic of a woman that will determine my willingness to marry her is her character/general personality qualities and traits. Sure, I need to be attracted to her (what relationships could survive without that???), but she does not need to be a model. In fact, I actually avoid women that are "10s" -

 

No offense but :lmao:don't believe you, sorry.

 

it is not worth the trouble in the long run. My current girlfriend is a little more um... curvateous...

 

That's what I thought. You have a fat g/f. That's ok. Nothing wrong with that.

 

than my ideal "preferences", but that would never prevent me from even possibly marrying her if she really turns out to be the nice person she seems to be.

 

Riiiiggghhht....

 

So, that's not the same as calling a guy who makes 40k "broke" and making it a dealbreaker for a relationship. That's not having standards, that's entitlement .

 

Hilarious. What nonsense. How is it "entitlement?"

[BareGoddess]

Completely agree The first thing my SO asked when hearing how that guy responded to me was "ah one of those bitter ones you have on your love forum?"

 

Oh crap! Funny! Actually that was close - but much nicer - than what my H said! YIKES!

[Trialbyfire]

Not to mention the suggesting that not having a husband and/or child equates to having no family, wtf is that?

His reasoning is bizarre. Not everyone is in a rush to get married and have a family. There are people who are very happy while being married and having a family and others who are intensely miserable.

 

Successful relationships don't always include marriage. Successful marriages don't always include children. It's as if he's trapped in one stereotype.

[BareGoddess]

Or in other words, 34, no family and single..

 

I think we need a section on this forum of people whom are successful in relationships to give advice.

 

I can't stop laughing. If this were almost any other thread on LS I'd agree with you but on a thread entitled "would you fck someone for money?" Uhm, I don't see the relevance!

 

Oh and P.S. together 14 years and happily married for 13! (One stepson and one son together.) ;)Any questions?

[boxing123]

What I can honestly say about myself, and every single man I have ever known, is that a woman's income is NEVER a crucial deciding point as to what role she can play in his life. We look for personality traits, and of course attraction.

 

How does she treat us? Would she be a good mother? Is she stable? Caring? We do not then add the condition of "Oh, but she can't make 40 k or anything" Or "I need my dream house!"

 

Completely shallow. Lacking depth. What many of you do not realize is that you have NO compatibility with your chosen high earner, but you try and fool yourself into thinking you do. (If they even exist) Perhaps why you are all with your "dream husbands" and "dream boyfriends" but yet are alone on the internet arguing with strangers night after night. And you fit this in with your high earning busy careers as well. Amazing.

 

And any learned person knows that a large % of truly intelligent people in history were not "high earners". Many were always broke. Intelligence comes in many many forms. Perhaps truly intelligent people choose not to be in the rat race, working 80 hours a week to pay off a 30 year mortgage on a big box so that you can brag to your girlfriends.

 

So please, stop trying to use intelligence as a trait you seek, when it solely comes down to which guy with a good income would actually be dumb enough to marry me and hand it over.

[allina]

His reasoning is bizarre. Not everyone is in a rush to get married and have a family. There are people who are very happy while being married and having a family and others who are intensely miserable.

 

Successful relationships don't always include marriage. Successful marriages don't always include children. It's as if he's trapped in one stereotype.

 

Not to mention that family also comes in the form of parents, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, even best friends!

 

I'm not sure if I ever want to have a child, but I'm most definitely happy and I sure have a family

[Tomcat33]

Or in other words, 34, no family and single..

 

I think we need a section on this forum of people whom are successful in relationships to give advice.

 

Well duhhh what did you expect on a DATING advice forum? What would all the people in a successful relationships be doing on a dating advice site? Of course there are LS members who are happily attached and have been here for a while, but for the most part it is single people who are not in relationships giving advice. Go to a marriage forum is you want advice on dating soley from the attached.

 

And I don't agree that just because someone is not in a serious relationship at the time they can't give good advice. You can be unemployed at some point in your life does that mean that you cannot give advice on how to do a job well done? Now if you had never landed and kept a job of any kind you may not be the best person to give advice.

[Trialbyfire]

What I can honestly say about myself, and every single man I have ever known, is that a woman's income is NEVER a crucial deciding point as to what role she can play in his life. We look for personality traits, and of course attraction.

 

How does she treat us? Would she be a good mother? Is she stable? Caring? We do not then add the condition of "Oh, but she can't make 40 k or anything" Or "I need my dream house!"

 

Completely shallow. Lacking depth. What many of you do not realize is that you have NO compatibility with your chosen high earner, but you try and fool yourself into thinking you do. (If they even exist) Perhaps why you are all with your "dream husbands" and "dream boyfriends" but yet are alone on the internet arguing with strangers night after night. And you fit this in with your high earning busy careers as well. Amazing.

 

And any learned person knows that a large % of truly intelligent people in history were not "high earners". Many were always broke. Intelligence comes in many many forms. Perhaps truly intelligent people choose not to be in the rat race, working 80 hours a week to pay off a 30 year mortgage on a big box so that you can brag to your girlfriends.

 

So please, stop trying to use intelligence as a trait you seek, when it solely comes down to which guy with a good income would actually be dumb enough to marry me and hand it over.

And yet, here you are, arguing on the internet? Why? Because...you're such a progressive guy?

 

People can do more than one thing at a time. It's called multi-tasking. Get used to it and welcome to 2009!

[allina]

What I can honestly say about myself, and every single man I have ever known, is that a woman's income is NEVER a crucial deciding point as to what role she can play in his life. We look for personality traits, and of course attraction.

 

How does she treat us? Would she be a good mother? Is she stable? Caring? We do not then add the condition of "Oh, but she can't make 40 k or anything" Or "I need my dream house!"

 

Completely shallow. Lacking depth. What many of you do not realize is that you have NO compatibility with your chosen high earner, but you try and fool yourself into thinking you do. (If they even exist) Perhaps why you are all with your "dream husbands" and "dream boyfriends" but yet are alone on the internet arguing with strangers night after night. And you fit this in with your high earning busy careers as well. Amazing.

 

And any learned person knows that a large % of truly intelligent people in history were not "high earners". Many were always broke. Intelligence comes in many many forms. Perhaps truly intelligent people choose not to be in the rat race, working 80 hours a week to pay off a 30 year mortgage on a big box so that you can brag to your girlfriends.

 

So please, stop trying to use intelligence as a trait you seek, when it solely comes down to which guy with a good income would actually be dumb enough to marry me and hand it over.

 

 

What in the world are you talking about? What high earners? And who is working 80 hours a week?

 

Why can't you grasp the fact that some people, myself included, are in love, thrilled and extremely happy in their relationship. As I mentioned above I would have described many desirable personality traits had that been the topic of this thread. Since it's not I talked about career/income, a small fraction of what makes a desirable mate, but the fraction related to this thread.

 

Personally, I'm not alone on the internet. I'm watching a movie with my SO and posting, he's watching the film and updating his lap top. We're chatting, having a few laughs and enjoying ourselves.

 

Why is this so difficult for you to grasp? Why does this get you all riled up?

[Tomcat33]

Completely shallow. Lacking depth. What many of you do not realize is that you have NO compatibility with your chosen high earner, but you try and fool yourself into thinking you do. (If they even exist) Perhaps why you are all with your "dream husbands" and "dream boyfriends" but yet are alone on the internet arguing with strangers night after night. And you fit this in with your high earning busy careers as well. Amazing.

 

 

Oh ok why don't you tell us ALL who we are and who we are not compatible with? :lmao:

 

I can ASSURE you I am FAR more compatible with a man with equal or higher income level than I am than with someone of lower income. That just brings on too many problems, starting from not being able to enjoy the same types of lifestyles to competition issues because I make more than him, because I have more than he does, because I aspire to have different goals that I like to achieve because I am INTO self-improvement. A man who is modest in life aspirations and does his minumum wage job is not going to fit in well with me from an intellectual level to lifestyle, it just won't be stimulating enough for me on any level, sorry.

[BareGoddess]

What I can honestly say about myself, and every single man I have ever known, is that a woman's income is NEVER a crucial deciding point as to what role she can play in his life. We look for personality traits, and of course attraction.

 

How does she treat us? Would she be a good mother? Is she stable? Caring? We do not then add the condition of "Oh, but she can't make 40 k or anything" Or "I need my dream house!"

 

Completely shallow. Lacking depth. What many of you do not realize is that you have NO compatibility with your chosen high earner, but you try and fool yourself into thinking you do. (If they even exist) Perhaps why you are all with your "dream husbands" and "dream boyfriends" but yet are alone on the internet arguing with strangers night after night. And you fit this in with your high earning busy careers as well. Amazing.

 

And any learned person knows that a large % of truly intelligent people in history were not "high earners". Many were always broke. Intelligence comes in many many forms. Perhaps truly intelligent people choose not to be in the rat race, working 80 hours a week to pay off a 30 year mortgage on a big box so that you can brag to your girlfriends.

 

So please, stop trying to use intelligence as a trait you seek, when it solely comes down to which guy with a good income would actually be dumb enough to marry me and hand it over.

 

You're hilarious from start to finish! What, do you guys attend the same school for rejected and embittered men? Wow.

 

Uhm, I repeat a man's income was never the CRUCIAL deciding point for me either. I needed WAY more than that. And I got it. What is it that you don't get about that?

 

Sorry to burst our bubble but we're extremely compatible..have been for 14 years. I'm sitting on the couch right next to him. He's watching TV and I'm watching, typing, talking to him, etc. What a concept! And yep, every now and then he'll look over here and laugh and comment. Yeah, we're very incompatible!

 

Who cares about people in history and whether they were intelligent, broke, etc. yada, blah, blah. I got it all. So what's wrong with that? Still waiting for my answer.

 

Do you honestly think that the way he treats me and the kind of man didn't come first and foremost before anything else? Are you nuts? No way in hell would I settle for a man who treated me badly or didn't love me, or was a jerk. Been there, done that, honey. And I left him! And yep, he did pretty well for himself.

 

I didn't marry for money or to be supported. I married to be loved and to love. Get it?

 

My husband, by the way, is not part of any "rat race." He works for himself and answers to no one.

 

As to "handing it over" and being "dumb enough" to do so...hahaha. I don't think so. As I've said we've helped EACH OTHER over the years. As we do now. We've built all that we have together. We've been a team from day one.

 

It's sad that you'll never know what that's like.

[Trialbyfire]

 

What in the world are you talking about? And who is working 80 hours a week?

Well...GUILTY! I work a lot. Right now I'm working, while I'm posting. Same goes for during the day. I can see you're capable of multi-tasking too.

 

I think Bare Goddess also tends to multi-task.

[boxing123]

Well I am not the one with my dream mate, as so many on this thread seem to be. I do know if I was with her, I would be spending time with her.

 

Sounds like a very boring relationship. Never in my life have I ever used the internet in the presence of a woman I am dating. Unless of course to quickly look something up .

 

However it makes sense that I can find true compatibility and passion, as my pool of available women to date is not narrowed down to a tiny % of the population that is within a certain income bracket, that is just good enough on several other more important levels.

 

It is nice to be a man, and be TRULY independent in that I have the power and ability to date ANY woman I find to be interesting, regardless of income. And trust me, some of the most interesting and truly intelligent women are not 'high earners'.

 

The more you women think you are independent, in reality the more trapped you are. At least before you could be with any man you chose, as you did not work and he did. You might have actually truly loved/respected him. Now you work, and need a man that makes more. Well your pool is smaller, Congrats.

[Tomcat33]

It is nice to be a man, and be TRULY independent in that I have the power and ability to date ANY woman I find to be interesting, regardless of income. And trust me, some of the most interesting and truly intelligent women are not 'high earners'.

 

 

 

Is it REALLY that different to be you with lowered expectations than it is to be a woman with standards? I mean really you explained in another thread that you had to settle for a woman who was not as attractive as other women but she was good in terms of being submissive and following your lead and not giving you hard time in terms doing everything you wanted to do.

 

Women, me in particular, on the other hand I have always gone out with good looking guys with great personalities, very intellectually stimulating who also earned well and I never really had to settle and say, "he was everything I like in a guy except maybe not as good looking as other guys" He was the full package.

 

So really where are you and where am I? In the exact same place; single at the moment and posting on a dating forum as single people, so really HOW MUCH better is it to be you than it to be me (women of standards)?

[Trialbyfire]

I'm not even certain what boxing/vonerik is trying to accomplish beyond self-leveraging by gender. It's a form of personal validation, at the supposed expense of the other gender. That's really twisted.

[Tomcat33]

I'm not even certain what boxing/vonerik is trying to accomplish beyond self-leveraging by gender. .

 

OMG I SWEAR TO GOD I was just thinking the exact same thing!!

[Trialbyfire]

OMG I SWEAR TO GOD I was just thinking the exact same thing!!

The twisty style is pretty blatant.

[boxing123]

I will say not ALL women are the same. There truly is nothing like a real woman.

 

I do despise current day hypocritical feminists whom seem to be a woman only biologically. Nothing to offer, the inability to truly bond with a man, and primarily concerned about money, while parading themselves as equals.

 

And tomcat, I was obviously attracted to the woman, and she was far above average. I said she was not the most beautiful I have dated, and that did not matter at all.

[BareGoddess]

Well...GUILTY! I work a lot. Right now I'm working, while I'm posting. Same goes for during the day. I can see you're capable of multi-tasking too.

 

I think Bare Goddess also tends to multi-task.

 

Huh? What? Did I miss something? I was busy!

 

No, seriously I really was.

 

But you know what, in all seriousness? This quote below was funny!

 

Sounds like a very boring relationship. Never in my life have I ever used the internet in the presence of a woman I am dating. Unless of course to quickly look something up .

 

Of course you haven't. As you said "woman you were DATING." Some of us who are not single and are on here, aren't DATING...get it? We're in a relationship. Have you ever been in one of those? It's not like dating? We actually LIVE together and we're sitting next to each other and talking and watching tv and doing other things. I know that's probably a foreign concept for you but yeah...that's how it works. We have laptops. Those are computers that sit on your lap. Kind of like when you're reading next to your SO and you put your book down when you're interacting.

 

We don't have a date who is going to kiss us goodnight and not see us again. He/she will be here in the morning, etc. See how that works?

 

Interesting concept, isn't it?

[boxing123]

Actually I would not live with a woman before marriage. I would rather make an honest woman out of her, instead of playing house. Unless of course I was on the look out for something better, or was poor and needed to split bills.

 

It is already boring before marriage it seems ..

[Ocean-Blue]

People have lists. Then all that goes out the window when they meet someone that really gets to them...in that visceral, unmistakable way that makes you both insane and happy.

 

That said...

 

I can't see myself being with a broke/poor man. I don't like the idea of taking care of a man. He should be able to take care of himself.

 

We all agree that attraction is important. Well, that means different things to different people. No one wants to be with someone who is lazy, unambitious and all victimy (ugh).