Online Poker, he is an addict what can I do.

[Haruka]

I love my partner to bits, but I am regreting on telling him that facebook had online poker.

 

When he used to have the internet on at his place, he would spend hours on World Poker Tour. He would have a sleep and then get up at a god hour such as 2:30 to do "Comps". It got to the point he ran up his bill and had to have it disconnected.

 

That was a year ago. I was sitting on facebook a few weeks ago and my partner was getting annoyed that I wasn't spending time with him. I was chatting to friends that I haven't seen in ages. So I casually said that facebook had poker he could play while I chatted. His eyes lit up and he got excited.

 

Now when ever he comes to my place, he sits for like 15 minutes and then physically sprints to the computer. It's making me depressed that he is like this. Last week I tested him to see if he would reliease I wasn't home. I walked to a friends house, she lives on the corner. She plays online poker too but she doesn't play all day. So I sat for a few hours having a cup of tea and discussing things with her.

 

So I popped onto the chat bar and typed "Do you know where Haruka is?" to which he typed "I don't know sleeping?" so I replied "No I am at friends house."

 

The other day I was uploading photographs for my mother whom knitted two blankets for my cousins and she wanted one of the cousins to see which blanket she would like. He was getting agitated that it was taking so long and started to say I dilberatly waited till he came over to upload the photographs for my cousins. Which I didn't.

 

Now he is giving me time to be on my OWN computer. Yesterday he was on the computer for 3 hours before I got on. I was on it for an hour when he said time was up and it was his go. I looked at him glared and said "You were on it for 3 hours and I only got what a miserly one hour". He stated that DR phil was on.

 

I love Dr Phil and sometimes if the topics are boring I'll come on the computer. He is now saying that I pretend to like Dr Phil, so that he can get off the computer when I say its a boring topic.

 

Last night was the finally straw. I said to him your going to bed at one am (I am now resorting to tell him to go to bed). I watched a movie and it was a quarter past one. I told him your coming to bed now. To which he said no. I muttered he was ridiclous and he said a few choice things. So I just went to bed.

 

I wish he could see that he is an addict, thank god facebook poker is free. It is getting to the point that it is scary and that he is now setting me times to be on my own computer. I get two hours during the day and three hours after dinner. The rest of the time he spends time on there.

 

What should I do? I am tempted to ring a gambling help line or at the least write a petition to get teh online poker closed. What should I do?

[Centuris]

Has this still been a problem since you last wrote?

 

Has he always been addictive with stuff like this?

 

I used to play lots of computer games when I was younger, but since my job has gotten busier and I have kids I have no time anymore. I generally force myself to go to bed at minimum by midnight so I can be fresh for work the next day.

 

Of course self control can only come from within, but does he ever agree to any rules you try to set for your life together.

 

For example, if you asked him to commit to only 2 hours a day max on the computer, would he possibly agree, even if you had a timer? Has he ever given up anything based on what you asked?

 

By the way just curious what is your native language because I think it's curious to use the word miserly in an English sentence the way you described.

 

By the way, what are some things you like about this guy?