candykisses Posted January 15, 2009 Share Posted January 15, 2009 So I asked out this guy a couple of months ago and he turned me down. We continued to get to know one another and now we are friends. The thing is I still like him more than a friend but I haven't flirted with him or anything like that since he said no to my invite. I figured that all we would be is friends. But me and my friends have noticed the way he looks at me, he can't stop staring at me and if I can't give him some attention he will get in my face and make sure he gets my attention. He is constantly looking or staring at me and smiling at me when I look at him. He even skipped something he had planned so he could see me before we left for Christmas vacation. Since then I have seen him once but I wasn't able to talk to him as I was busy and also a little shy about seeing him. My friends think I should ask him out again because he obviously likes me by the way he looks at me. I don't know if I should, I think he know I like him so the ball is in his court about him asking me out this time. What do you think? Should I ask him or let him do it? Does it seem like he even likes me as more than a friend? Link to post Share on other sites
Jada Posted January 16, 2009 Share Posted January 16, 2009 Well I think you should start seeing him separately as a friend like doing things with him on your own and letting it progress from there and see where it takes you. Link to post Share on other sites
thegoodlife Posted January 16, 2009 Share Posted January 16, 2009 I think you should leave it up to him. Perhaps you could send some signals that you still are interested since you said you haven't flirted with him or anything since he said no. So maybe the reason he hasn't asked you yet if he does like you is because he's trying to feel you out, to see if the feelings are mutual. But you've already put yourself out there once and he didn't take the opportunity so I think it should be him to do the asking this time around. Link to post Share on other sites
Rebellious Posted January 17, 2009 Share Posted January 17, 2009 Maybe he didn't realize that you asked him out, us guys don't catch on sometimes and we just assume that the girl is just being friendly. Were you direct? Link to post Share on other sites
Author candykisses Posted January 18, 2009 Author Share Posted January 18, 2009 Yes, I asked him if he would like to have dinner with me. He said no but then started getting fidgety and started rambling about some stuff. He then started to ask me about my personal life. It was just really confusing to me, how he acted in moments after I asked him out. Not the normal conversation you would have after you turn someone down. Link to post Share on other sites
mpw3 Posted February 8, 2009 Share Posted February 8, 2009 You are courageous in asking him out first, and continuing the friendship. But just be straight up with the guy, I know you are not shy if you already asked him out. Just ask him if he is interested in something romantic and why he is constantly looking at you like that. Link to post Share on other sites
norajane Posted February 8, 2009 Share Posted February 8, 2009 Nope, don't ask him out. Smile, flirt, flirt, flirt. But do not ask him out. Guys say they want to be asked out, but that never really works out well. A guy who is interested will ask you out. If he doesn't, he's not that into you. Really. Link to post Share on other sites
mpw3 Posted February 8, 2009 Share Posted February 8, 2009 Nope, don't ask him out. Smile, flirt, flirt, flirt. But do not ask him out. Guys say they want to be asked out, but that never really works out well. A guy who is interested will ask you out. If he doesn't, he's not that into you. Really. She already asked him out to dinner, he declined. Guys say they want to be asked out because it's true. If a good looking woman flirted with intent, not some attention whore, with a guy and make her interest known via some non verbal signals and guy is awared of that. The woman then approach the man and ask him out, most men would be flattered and pleased. Notice, I said good looking woman. If after the woman asked the man out, and it doesn't work out, it really doesn't mean it's because she asked him out first. A lot of relationships don't work even had the man asked the woman out first. Link to post Share on other sites
norajane Posted February 8, 2009 Share Posted February 8, 2009 She already asked him out to dinner, he declined. Yes, even more reason not to ask him out now. Link to post Share on other sites
Taramere Posted February 9, 2009 Share Posted February 9, 2009 Yes, I asked him if he would like to have dinner with me. He said no but then started getting fidgety and started rambling about some stuff. He then started to ask me about my personal life. It was just really confusing to me, how he acted in moments after I asked him out. Not the normal conversation you would have after you turn someone down. Sounds as though he's awkward around women. I don't really know what you do with a guy like that, but I suspect that you probably do need to take a bolder than usual approach. I wouldn't be asking him out again, but I think I'd be tempted to broach the fact that he turned down the dinner invitation I'd made previously. Something like... "Remember when I asked you to dinner? I wondered if that freaked you out a little bit. What's your take on women who ask men out on dates?" Link to post Share on other sites
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