Boyfriend broke up with me because there is no passion...how do you get it back?

[newage]

My boyfriend broke up with me last night, he said that he doesnt feel any passion for me. We've been together for almost a year and live together.

 

Can anything be done to bring that passion back?

[Tony T]

First of all, don't take it personally. It's something that just happens, and mostly with people who aren't very mature about relationships. YOU cannot create passion in another person. That's something they have to do in their own head. You can stand on your head and contortion your body in every direction but if the other person is not with the program it's all for naught.

 

If anything can put the passion back temporarily anyway, yes...don't call or contact you man in any way whatsoever. If he doesn't hear from you, it will drive him out of his mind. Chances are excellent that you were too nice and too available. That can cut short the passion, which is stirred in people by unpredicability. Men love women who are aloof and put on an air that they can do without them...don't ask me why.

 

Relationships just don't stay in high drive forever. Passion diminishes over time. If there is not love, committment, friendship and a strong desire to have a person in your life forever, it's just not going to work. Consider yourself lucky that this guy was honest instead of trying to push himself to hang around out of guilt or being to lazy to move along. You need to find somebody who loves you who has enough insight to understand that high drive passion doesn't last forever...a person who will consider you his dearest friend and somebody he can't live without. Find a guy like that and the passion will remain anyway, at least in some form.

 

Yes, it's painful right now but in time you'll appreciate this guy's honesty (most people crave for the honest reason a relationship ended). Again, don't take it personally because the next guy may see fireworks with you forever. We aren't meant for everybody.

[dlb311]

I had a relationship for 2 years. We broke up about 4 months ago. He started to distance himself from me. We were planning on moving in together with in the month that we broke up. It was hard because we were so good together. He said that the passion was gone. Well the truth is after two years life can get in the way of passion. There is work, maybe school, family and friends and not to mention bills. So of course you can get side tracted. He didn't give us enough time to find it again. Now he says he isn't ready RIGHT NOW for that serious of a relationship. But wants me in his life. I keep telling him its to hard for me. But sometimes I wish I would just have him in my life because I miss him so much. But I wont pretend that I don't love him. He still tells me he loves me every time we talk? But needs his time? What the hell?

My advise is to keep your distance and act like life wont be over if he never comes back because the truth is its not and its not attractive when you tell them crap like that. So let him know your life is well and that you love him and you want him in your life. But that it takes 2 for passion to be present you can't do all the work and yes he has to want the passion to come back.

 

Its not easy to just let someone go. My moto is live with no regrets. Try your best and knowing that you deserve the best that you are a good person if he can't come to see that in time, no matter what you will be okay and work things out or find a new love. Remember to learn something for this all. If you are to get back together don't go back into the way it use to be. You broke up for a reason. So make it better.

Good luck!