NICE GUYS WILL ALWAYS FINISH LAST

[Buddy]

Let me just say something. To be a 16 year old male has got to be one of the worst things ever. All it is is temptation and deprevation. Im not talking about having a non sexually active relationship. Im talking about developing a relationship in the first place. Girls always want to date the wrong guys at this age ( boys whos smoke all the time and treat the girls like *#%@ and only want s#x) Mean while the nice guy is looked upon as the "outcast". As a "nice guy" i stuggle to develop a relationship past friendship. MY POINT IS THIS, GIRLS, IF YOU DATE TRASHY GUYS THEY ARE GOING TO TREAT YOU LIKE SH*T. i wrote this out of love, anger and s#xual frustration.

i would also like some advice. Where should i go from here in life, ih ave nothing.

[Mr Nice Guy]

Let me just say something. To be a 16 year old male has got to be one of the worst things ever. All it is is temptation and deprevation. Im not talking about having a non sexually active relationship. Im talking about developing a relationship in the first place. Girls always want to date the wrong guys at this age ( boys whos smoke all the time and treat the girls like *#%@ and only want s#x) Mean while the nice guy is looked upon as the "outcast". As a "nice guy" i stuggle to develop a relationship past friendship. MY POINT IS THIS, GIRLS, IF YOU DATE TRASHY GUYS THEY ARE GOING TO TREAT YOU LIKE SH*T. i wrote this out of love, anger and s#xual frustration.

 

i would also like some advice. Where should i go from here in life, ih ave nothing.

 

 

 

Buddy,

 

I know the feeling. Now, I am 23, but when I was in high school, I never had a girlfriend. Believe me, it wasn't for lack of trying. I had a few dates, but nothing serious. I finally met my girlfriend when I was 18, after graduating from high school. Now I am 23 and still going out with the same girl. If there is one thing I have learned about love, it is not that "Nice guys finish last", but that "The Best Things Come To Those Who Wait". I believe that everybody has someone out there for them. Don't be in a rush to start dating, because you might end up trying to make it work with one person, and total miss the right one for you. Good luck.

[Buddy]

Let me just say something. To be a 16 year old male has got to be one of the worst things ever. All it is is temptation and deprevation. Im not talking about having a non sexually active relationship. Im talking about developing a relationship in the first place. Girls always want to date the wrong guys at this age ( boys whos smoke all the time and treat the girls like *#%@ and only want s#x) Mean while the nice guy is looked upon as the "outcast". As a "nice guy" i stuggle to develop a relationship past friendship. MY POINT IS THIS, GIRLS, IF YOU DATE TRASHY GUYS THEY ARE GOING TO TREAT YOU LIKE SH*T. i wrote this out of love, anger and s#xual frustration.

 

i would also like some advice. Where should i go from here in life, ih ave nothing.

 

 

Buddy,

 

I know the feeling. Now, I am 23, but when I was in high school, I never had a girlfriend. Believe me, it wasn't for lack of trying. I had a few dates, but nothing serious. I finally met my girlfriend when I was 18, after graduating from high school. Now I am 23 and still going out with the same girl. If there is one thing I have learned about love, it is not that "Nice guys finish last", but that "The Best Things Come To Those Who Wait". I believe that everybody has someone out there for them. Don't be in a rush to start dating, because you might end up trying to make it work with one person, and total miss the right one for you. Good luck.

 

 

I really appereciate your advice, but the only problem with the ideal of "there is only one other person out there for me" is that when you do find someone you will always be asking your self is she the one or is there someone else outthere. Thank you very much for the compassion and understanding. I respect your opinion and i dont know for my self which out look is for me.

[LoveAngel]

i wrote this out of love, anger and s#xual frustration.

 

i would also like some advice. Where should i go from here in life, ih ave nothing.

 

 

Buddy,

 

 

It seems that something lies a bit deeper here. What happened to cause you to feel this way? You have a lot -- more than some people will ever have in their lifetimes, whether you realize it or not. At 16, most people are just beginning to grasp the ideas of dating. I know it seems that everyone else has a girlfriend and that their relationships may seem shallow. Well, the fact is that most are. But you must understand that they're learning from their experiences and building a repertoire of characteristics they want in their future partners. It's kind of like a testing ground for the future. Don't be disgrunteled because you haven't "dated" anyone or aren't currently in a relationship.

 

 

It sounds to me that you were rejected by someone, perhaps only indirectly, that you cared about. Perhaps she's seeing someone else now who you think is pond scum. That can be quite frustrating when it happens, but just like all of the other little relationships happening around you, most will end in both people knowing something new. You're seldom going to settle down at 16. That doesn't mean that life-long relationships can't begin at any age -- for that is very untrue. But rather, that most of them aren't serious -- and that's true far into life. Don't sell yourself short. I firmly believe that there's someone out there for everyone in this world. Your feelings are very normal and very common for any person. Ms. Right isn't just going to appear in front of your eyes like a fairy tale and you shouldn't concentrate so hard on looking that life passes you by. Develop friendships with girls around you -- not for the purpose of dating them later on, but to share a platonic relationship first with them. Discover what their concerns are and fears. See what builds from that. I'm sure it won't be disappointing and will definately surprise you. And when Ms. Right does appear, you'll least expect it, but you'll be eternally happy!

 

 

You may want to join us in the chat room to discuss this a bit more, especially regarding the reasons you've become upset. Best regards and wishes!

 

 

Yours,

 

LoveAngel

[Todd]

Dude, I have to agree. The women around my school that I see are quite beautiful. But they always are going out with the SCUM OF THE *****ING EARTH!

I've seen a knockout girl going out with a druggie who beats her constantly, and she won't leave him!

 

I have my own insecurities about women, but there is a limit to what I think is morally right, and us good guys are getting trampled by the evils of the world, and it is not right, nor is it fair.

[Andy]

Dude, I have to agree. The women around my school that I see are quite beautiful. But they always are going out with the SCUM OF THE *****ING EARTH!

 

I've seen a knockout girl going out with a druggie who beats her constantly, and she won't leave him!

 

 

I have my own insecurities about women, but there is a limit to what I think is morally right, and us good guys are getting trampled by the evils of the world, and it is not right, nor is it fair.

 

 

Take a step back, guys and give the whole boy/gal thing a second hard, long look. The whole thing has nothing to do with being nice. It's biology. It's survival of the fittist. When you see the best girls going out with the worst guys, there's all kinds of hidden agendas going on that have nothing to do with love, respect or even sexual attraction. Just like the guys and girls who smoke, take drugs, go to church every sunday, or cut their hair wierd, they're experimenting with who they either want to be, or who they think they want to be. Girls go for guys who they think are going to protect and provide - this is at a very sub-concious level, you understand - if you asked them why they go with the jerk who drives the Camaro with the furry dice, they'd say because he was 'cute' - but really it's because they belief he will make a good defender and provider and yes, most sixteen year old girls have very strange ideas about what constitutes a protector and provider. Those girls aren't looking for a friend or someone to be sensitive and nice - they are looking for status and peer approval.

 

 

You might think you want one of those girls, and nothing will persuade you otherwise until you get one and then loose her to the next guy and you get your heart broken. Such is life.

 

 

There are girls there at your school, the quiet ones, the ones who have become your friend, the ones that always say hi as they pass you in the hall. You don't even see them sometimes, hardly register that they are there. But they are, and they see you. May be she's right there now in your English class - but your testosterone is blinding you to all but the unobtainable.

[Bunny]

Okay,okay,hold it.Now you know 'Nice guys' aren't the only ones that finish last....it may surprise you to know that not all girls are out for the druggies with the cool car and the weird doo or anything like that.You are right to some extent though...I've meet a lot of perfectly wonderful girls going out with the scum of the earth and all the ones I know say something like..."He has an inferiorty complex or something...you don't know him like I do."Things do get screwed up......ButI'd be willing to bet my bottom dollar that if you look around there's most probably girls in your past nice girls whom you never gave a chance because they were..you know like 15 pounds over weight or had braces or something.It's not just a big girls have it bad or boys have it bad kinda thing....there's plenty of sweet wonderful guys out there that got over looked by girls because they weren't willing to dig deep enough to get past the boyz shyness,and there's plenty of girls out there who get dump or never even asked out because there waist weren't skinny enough or teeth weren't straight enough....all I'm saying is that it's two way street.So don't feel so alone about it.