x0xBrittx0x Posted September 26, 2003 Posted September 26, 2003 I'm always wishing bad things on my friends..like in school I always hope they get detention, or in sports I always hope they are the cause of the other team scoring, if a rumor goes around about them I just laugh and think its funny instead of sticking up for them..whats wrong with me? I do this with about everyone of my friends and I dont know why? PLEASE HELP!!!
Jamie31 Posted September 26, 2003 Posted September 26, 2003 I used to be like that too, kind of. It's all about competition in high school. You want to be the best and if your friends are better, it takes the attention away from you. It's completely understandable. And more than likely they are thinkng the same thing about you. Just try to focus on what you are doing and put all your effort into doing the best you can in you activities in school and you will come out on top.
Clancy Posted September 26, 2003 Posted September 26, 2003 You know, there's something called " abundance mentality". It's actually a concept from the business world but it can work in your own life. It means a way of thinking that has you feeling and believing that there's enough good luck and rewards of life available for everyone. Maybe you could try thinking that way. For example, there's plenty of good friends for everyone, there's plenty guys for all of the girls there's plenty of girls for all of the boys, there's plenty of compliments for everyone, good times for evryone, happiness for everyone. We don't have to think that the only way we are successful is through the failure of others, which is really why you want to see your friends have hard times. Their hardtimes make it seem as though you are having much, much better times. Their failure makes you a success. Try to change the way you look at life. Start hoping for the success of others. You may find that success starts to find you more often as a result. One of the best ways to start this in action is every week make sure that you do something good for someone but don't tell a soul or let anyone know. It doesn't have to be something big just something that in some way helps someone else.
cindy0039 Posted September 26, 2003 Posted September 26, 2003 Originally posted by Jamie31 You want to be the best and if your friends are better, it takes the attention away from you. It's completely understandable. And more than likely they are thinkng the same thing about you. Not of they're REALLY your friends.
jenny Posted September 26, 2003 Posted September 26, 2003 that's cool, i've never heard of that term. it's a bit like the mentality in novels that i love and among the friends i enjoy. Originally posted by Clancy You know, there's something called " abundance mentality". It's actually a concept from the business world but it can work in your own life. It means a way of thinking that has you feeling and believing that there's enough good luck and rewards of life available for everyone. Maybe you could try thinking that way. For example, there's plenty of good friends for everyone, there's plenty guys for all of the girls there's plenty of girls for all of the boys, there's plenty of compliments for everyone, good times for evryone, happiness for everyone. We don't have to think that the only way we are successful is through the failure of others, which is really why you want to see your friends have hard times. Their hardtimes make it seem as though you are having much, much better times. Their failure makes you a success. Try to change the way you look at life. Start hoping for the success of others. You may find that success starts to find you more often as a result. One of the best ways to start this in action is every week make sure that you do something good for someone but don't tell a soul or let anyone know. It doesn't have to be something big just something that in some way helps someone else.
cindy0039 Posted September 26, 2003 Posted September 26, 2003 Originally posted by cindy0039 Not of they're REALLY your friends. Oops, typo. I meant to say: Not IF they're REALLY your friends.
serenity Posted September 26, 2003 Posted September 26, 2003 i think that if u feel that way about them then its not true friendship that u have with them
Kelebek Posted September 29, 2003 Posted September 29, 2003 I'd have to agree with Serenity. Sometimes when I'm going through a bout of the "poor-me's" and my friends are sailing through life, I think wistfully, "Why can't I have what they have, why does all the good stuff never happen to me........." etc. But I never actually wish bad stuff to happen to them. If you have that little loyalty and integrity, you'll soon find yourself with no friends at all.
blindeyeforaneye Posted September 30, 2003 Posted September 30, 2003 Clancy I really liked what you said, you're very wise! Umm, I want to be your friend . I agree with the above poster that you aren't really friends. In life, we get to choose our friends, and IMO a basic requirement of friendship is that you wish your friends well, because you care about them. I think this does have more to do with you, and your inadequacies, you seem to have issues with trust and caring. It's good that you've identified this as a problem, now try to change your attitudes, get counselling, or if you really don't care about your current group of friends, find something or someone to care about. Life's short, don't waste your energy on pettiness about how other's lives are enfolding, focus on your life, and live it well.
Heidi2 Posted October 2, 2003 Posted October 2, 2003 Originally posted by x0xBrittx0x I'm always wishing bad things on my friends.. whats wrong with me? Could you in any way.. perhaps be jealous of your friends? And if in any instances they get some form of attention that you might not get at the time,you feel in order to not gain to their 'fame', you will in fact ignore what's being presented before you? I used to be of such circumstances while in elemenatry/middle school.. Perhaps it's just a stage that we eventually grow out of.. called: "I wish I was, but in essence I will never be."
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