I broke up with her, but still can't forget.

[DJMarky]

Don't you get it? The more you contact her and call her a slut and get all angry the more you validate your role as someone shes just going to use and spit out.

 

You want to know what to do. Stop being a wuss and returning every call she makes to you, stop texting her friends. Stop everything.....No calls, no text, no emails, no facebook, no myspace, no nothing. Block her if you must and ask yourself honestly, "is this what you want out of a relationship?"

 

Every time you make a new post its about how she called or texted 2-3 times and I just know a few paragraphs down there's going to be something about you calling her back and then this dramatic **** unfolds. Just stop............STOP

 

The thing with her friends was before I even made this thread, I wouldn't have done it now.

 

I deleted her from facebook the day I broke up with her, and then wrote her an email telling her I was pissed off etc etc, and smsed her but that was within the week of the break up, since then I have never initiated the conversation or had the need to tell her I thought she was a whore etc etc, I just say it on here.

 

Your not listening, I tried, you were doing better but you got back to talking to her, she got back the power, you are now losing again...

 

U stop listening, I told you, U don't know what your doing, U don't understand whats going on, your going to suffer.

 

Good Luck

 

I haven't gone back to talking to her since I told you she called to talk about her brother, and then called me again abt messaging her friends. I haven't initiated the convos since I semi-abused her to get it out of my system and that's the time you guys told me to stop, so I have been listening.

 

Also, she called me last night but I was out at a festival so didn't call her back and didn't bother this morning/afternoon, so I think I still have some respect.

 

From now on I won't even bother answering/replying .. I was just using your advice what you said before about saying something like "I feel as if you should focus all your attention on your current boyfriend, we are not together anymore, have a blessed day" but now I think I will just ignore her.

 

I am listening to you guys.

[DJMarky]

So um yeh, she called me twice tonight. I didn't call back. Probably some topic about dropping off my clothes after visiting her lovers house or some **** I don't care about. I told her to just leave them at my front door last week so no idea why she is calling me. It's actually starting to **** me over cause I can't move on.

 

[EDIT]

 

Ok, so i'll listen to you guys, which means I'll stop posting on this thread and bumping it, since there are more important ones with people who have more serious problems. Just curious what wiseone1 has to say. Ill only post if something substantial happens, like finding out she used to be a man and that I have now contracted a hybrid strand of genital herpes that will slowly eat away at my testicles.

[Goatsbreath]

I understand your in pain dude, I really do but you just need to focus on being indiffirent to this girl. When your about to do something, ask yourself, is this something someone who is indiffirent would do. You might not really be indiffirent but you need to fake it until you make it. Good luck man, lots of us share your pain.

[BackonTrack2]

no dude, you can keep posting, don't feel bad, POST, post more, but just note, I am going to bash you if I feel its necessary..

 

Also, just a reminder, NO CONTACT, NO NOTHING, no emails, text(s), friends, nothing for no reason, never, ever, never until your better, which is going to be in a few months, in the mean time, post here instead of contacting your EX, or her friends, or anyone related to her, she's no good.

 

she wants nothing to do with you, or post in the coping section under "post here instead of contacting your ex"

 

this is internet therapy, its cheaper than the real thing ;-)

[DJMarky]

no dude, you can keep posting, don't feel bad, POST, post more, but just note, I am going to bash you if I feel its necessary..

 

Also, just a reminder, NO CONTACT, NO NOTHING, no emails, text(s), friends, nothing for no reason, never, ever, never until your better, which is going to be in a few months, in the mean time, post here instead of contacting your EX, or her friends, or anyone related to her, she's no good.

 

she wants nothing to do with you, or post in the coping section under "post here instead of contacting your ex"

 

this is internet therapy, its cheaper than the real thing ;-)

 

Hmm, it does feel good to get **** off my chest, even if it is over the internet and to also know others are going through the same thing.

 

I think I am recovering pretty quickly, the first few days after I broke up with her I couldn't really eat and was sulking (not crying, I rarely cry), especially when I found out she had already moved on to that other guy, but now I have got my appetite back and am slowly returning to my energetic self. People at work knew something was up the first week cause I was pretty quiet, compared to my usual energetic/annoying self but now I am pretty much back to normal.

 

I still think about her, especially with that faggot but nothing I can do about it. I don't wake up in the night sweating thinking about them together like I did initially. She's a bitch so I saved myself by getting out early.

 

I just wish she would stop calling/texting me, especially with mixed **** about thinking about me. Makes it hard to just get over it, cause it brings my thoughts back to her. A part of me wants to answer the call, incase she is going to say something like, 'I want to come over and give you head while *insert dirty scenario here*' which was common when we went out, but I know it's not worth it and probably not the case. Also, I don't want her to think she can call me and talk about her problems, like I am some kind of intellectual whore.

 

I really want to get over her before Japan, she is just ****ing things up trying to contact me. Part of me is glad she is thinking about me, but the other part realises its not healthy. I don't know what I would do if she came to my house crying asking for me back, I would like to hope I would have some self control and realise she treated me like utter **** and isn't worthy of another chance, plus she is annoying as hell. Though, I don't think she would want to get back, probably just likes ****ing with me.

 

Are you sure she wants nothing to do with me? I don't know if I have fully accepted it's over, like a part of me wants her to come begging back, but I know it won't happen, plus if I think rationally I shouldn't want her back at all. It's so messed up.

 

I will try and stick to NC, I just hope it either ends her trying to contact me, or her rocking up to my house upset then I can shut her down in person and feel some sort of gratification.

[BackonTrack2]

Yes, I am sure you should stick to NC.

 

Its going to make her keep contacting you and contacting you and eventually she will wonder why you haven't answered then she will come on stronger and stronger, then get deseperate.

 

She wasn't a smart one, she made her departure before establishing that bond with the new guy, so she still is tied to you emmotionally, my ex was smart, she did it the right whoring way.... She used me and used me until she was "there" with the new guy, first no sex but we hung out, then stop coming around then started sounding confused, then started sounding sad, like now that I think about it, I watched everything happen, then I broke up with her, she came running, (she wasn't 100% certain), then started testing me to see if I cared, then started coming closer, sex again, then more time, then her friend told on her, then that was the end...

 

Break-Up NOW

I cussed her out, kicked out, she didn't quit, constant contact, I told her "Die whore, die" or "The whore is still alive" wouldn't quit, then she got me with this pride line, now we are back in communication, she sounds sad at first, then grows COCKY, started to treat me like ****, I took it, I took it, then she comes over, I change my mind, I throw her out, the END, I called her week later, she had more work to do, she was sad, crying, I didn't understand, she knew it was over, I sent her some packages, she was to mail it back to me, the day came when she was to mail it back, she called me, sounded confused, crying, I told her its OK, come over, she was happy, I hung up, the next morning she called, 3-4 times, I was sleeping, I awoke,

I called her back, We started chatting as if nothing was wrong, we were still connected, I felt it, she was happy, about 5 minutes later, I realized, then I told her do not call me after work hours, she sound so strange, said "Ok MY_Name", after that she stop calling, stop trying, now I was going mad (like you), I called her one day, 2am in the morning, I remember like it was yesterday, she picked up, things were the same, then she must of realized, I asked her to come over, she spazzed out, and said "I need space"

 

I hung up, broke my iphone against the glass, I played it cool though, the next morning, she is calling me crazy (she must of realized that was all I needed to get rid of her) I dodged the call(s), she called me from a unblock number, she was trying to stop me from doing waht I was about to do, Fire HER, X her for GOOD, for LIFE, I picked up, she goes "Are you going to fire me", I say "No Baby" she says "Ok", then I hung up, she still had power over me, the next morning, I awoke, fired her in a cocky way... It was GREAT, I was over it, no pain, no hurt, my mind was perfect.

 

One week later, I go back for her, I call her, deseperately, maybe 7 or 8 times, she picks up, she is ANGRY, ANGRY (why I don't know), I start talking, she listenings, I begin to tear, she starts crying, I hear it, I tell her "I am not a fool, I knew you were doing that, since XX, I just want you to be happy, this to hard, I am going to hang up now"

 

That was IT, I had nothing LEFT, nothing. I sent her an email about hour later, she replied back within 5 minutes, cussed me the fawk out, it didn't hit me yet, the next morning, I am broken, I am done, I hear her voice in my head, its so loud, defeaing, I am having panic attacks, fainting, collpasing on the floor, I am FINISHED, it took 10 months to recover.

 

I waited for her, almost a year, my life stooped, business stooped, money ran out, almost got evicted, not working, went in a hole, just waiting, waiting, she never came back.

 

If it wasn't for my good deeds in the past, I would be OVER, friends saved me, multiple friends, at different points, I did not't fall completely, I was gone, it was over for me. But I'm back now, building again, business is good, focused again, datting again, going out again, happy again, having fun again.

 

You didn't get as far as me, be happy

 

-----

 

Stay away from that GIRL, she's poision, I know what yoru going threw, be happy its OVER, be happy. Yeah you still love her, so you want her back, you want her to come begging, she won't and if she does its not geniuqine, you had to manliplate her into doing it (no contact), you took away the drug (emmotional bond) she doesn't have yet, she is going to go crazy if she doesn't get her FIX, by you talking to her, your helping her leave you, your giving her the drug in small dosses, don't help her, she doesn't deserve it.

 

Your girl is probably not accustomed to having her emmotional support taken away just like that so her emmotions are messed up but your smart, you came to seek advice, now she can't use you or hurt you while she fixes herself on your dime.

 

Anyway, your not going to get over her before Japan, its going to take a WHILE, a WHILE, long time, few months. Work thorugh the pain, whatever you do, don't stop fighting, don't give in, it will set you back, find a friend, female friend, build a bond with her, you have to get your ex out of your brain, don't stay shacked up at home, even if you don't want too, go outside, have fun, TALK to females, don't tell them your problem, keep going, don't stop, keep fighting.

 

If I was you, I would just change my number, that would really mess up her head, go NC, not to make her feel bad, but she is delaying your healing, she still holds power over you, to much, she's not a good person. I know women, she's not a good girl. You don't want someone like that.

 

Wait until after Japan, then talk to her, if she text you, don't respond, delete it, don't even read it, its OVER, end this now, clean break, don't pro-long it, no visits, no friend talks, no nothing.

 

She is using you, for her benifit, maybe she doesn't mean to, but thats what she's doing. You should be scared of her, run if you see her, run fast.

 

This is not a game, heal yourself, come back stronger, then decide if you want to continue datting her.

 

In the very end, I still don't know what happen, I just know she's gone, I still remember. Its been a year, I still remember, don't be like me, don't stick around.

Good Luck

[DJMarky]

Thanks man, probably have to read that a few times to get all of it in.

 

I knew she had no respect for her ex, he kept calling her, smsing, buying her more than I spent on her etc etc. I have more respect than that, and because she is hot she has probably had every guy she has been with try and try to get her back. I just gave up and luckily for me all my friends/family saw through her early on and confirmed that she is a total and utter bitch, in every sense of the word.

 

You were right when you said she is told she is perfect. Every guy under the sun is ready to do as she pleases, she uses her looks to get her through every single situation.

 

But hey I am not like every other guy she has been with. Firstly, she actively sought me, even when she had a boyfriend cause she wanted ME. Secondly, she has never told another guy she loved them before, and she told me a thousand times, through sms, email and in person, all the time about how I was her first love and she would never forget me. Thirdly, I broke up with her, no guy has ever done that to her before, she has always been with a guy, got tired of them and discarded them. I saw her doing that to me, so I ended it before she could. She is now calling me and I am not answering. I consider myself the winner in this whole mess. I will never go crawling back, I will not lose my dignity to this bitch.

 

Cheers for the continuing support. I will keep up NC.

 

My plane flight is next tuesday! Only a week til I can leave her behind. I don't want this bitch ruining my trip.

[DJMarky]

Wow, a wave of anger hit me.

 

She is such a ****ing bitch, damn I hate her so much and she is calling me, probably to act as if everything is ok and ask advice about her new ****ing boyfriend. I really really really really really really really ****ing hate her. I can't believe I loved this bitch. The one who supposedly loved me, but couldn't tell her ex or his friends about me, even though apparently she really loved me.

[BackonTrack2]

Yeah, its going to be like that for a while, after your finished being angry, your just going to MISS HER. You are going to want to call her, you are going to wonder why she hasn't come back, you are going to get flashes and feel as if everything was a lie.

 

This is "it" leaving your system.

 

Then after this, your going to start getting better and be happy again.

Its going to take a while.

 

In the MEAN-TIME, don't STOP, keep planning your trip to Japan, pack up all your stuff, get everything ready, hang out with friends, call up OLD friends and see what they are UP too.

 

Start exercising, start eating healthy, stay outside, stay with people, don't drink alcohol, remember your sick.

[DJMarky]

I exercise quite regularly so that aint a problem, but not drinking will be a hard one considering every weekend I am going out to a party/pub/club with friends. I have noticed recently when I drink I just dwell on the situation, so it isn't helping out.

 

She called me this morning at work, of course I didn't return the call.

 

I feel pretty horrible ignoring her calls but I know it is for the best. I know if I hear her voice, or try and have a civilised conversation with her I will go back a few steps. I have to really hammer the idea into my brain that it is over for good. Hopefully I can avoid contact before this trip. I am so tempted to pick up the phone just to hear her voice, but no I must not. I think she gets the idea, considering I have ignored/not returned like 7 of her calls now.

 

I wish I knew what was going through her mind, whether she misses me or just wants to string me a long like she did with her other ex. After the sms she sent me last Friday when she was drunk I am unsure. It shouldn't even matter.

 

What is wrong with me? I know she isn't a good girl, and it would never work so why can't I just forget about her and get over her instantly. It is so frustrating.

[BackonTrack2]

I wish I knew what was going through her mind, whether she misses me or just wants to string me a long like she did with her other ex. After the sms she sent me last Friday when she was drunk I am unsure. It shouldn't even matter.

 

She is wondering WHY you all of sudden stop picking up her calls. She doesn't realize your HIP to her games and you won't play them any longer. Your no longer on the string. The tables are turning in your favor.

 

Sooner or later she is going to give up, she hasn't gotten it through her head that you no longer will be her puppet. She is also probably thinking that you hate her OR she is going to get desperate and call you one day like 5-6 times, and when you don't pick up then she'll give UP or try harder, depending on how crazy she is.

 

And nothing is wrong with you, its natural, your just recovering, that's all. Everyone goes through this, look at it like a right of passage

 

Hey man, maybe you might want to turn off your phone, u know since your going to Japan and all so you can save some money + you won't be bothered by her calling. And why do you feel horrible. Did she feel horrible when you she was ignoring YOUR CALL and fawking the other man?

 

Did she feel horrible when she denied your existence?

Did she feel horrible when you tried to be nice to her friends and she cussed you out and told you not to contact her friends?

Did she feel horrible telling you about how hot the new guy was and how, she has dreams about him?

 

And your not physic so no way your going to know what she's thinking, she's crazy

 

So why do you feel bad? (because u love her??) well she doesn't love you ] infact she so NOT love you so much, she started trashing talking to you, disrespecting you, and insulting you

 

Eitherway dude, I/We (help) are not saying your not never going to talk to her again, I'm just saying like you need some time to clear your mind and its good your going to be away in Japan for 5 weeks. I mean, its February right? So what, I'm pretty sure your going to live another I don't know, 50 years, so ONE month of not talking to her is not going to kill you right? She can wait....

 

So after you get back, THEN maybe if you want to call her, call her, but for right now, NO WAY. She holds to much power. Level the field up a little first.....

 

And I am not sure if she wants to string you along like her other EX's but past behavior is the best indicator of future/present behavior so the same thing she did to her last EX, is the SAME thing she is going to do to YOU. Your not special to her. She already proved this. And she was DRUNK, was she bold enough to say that SOBER? U really can't listen to drunk people..... They are DRUNK, You can't even drive a car while drunk much less tell someone you miss/love them. If/When she does it SOBER then you'll know the truth but based on actions (her cheating, disrespecting, insulting, throwing you away, ignoring your phone calls, sleeping with another man) I dunno man, a SMS is not enough, thats just wishful thinking.

 

Be happy you ended it NOW, rather than later, don't be like ME, you don't want that.... You really don't want that... Infact you should read foxh1234 story about his ex..

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t169473/

 

On on the UPSIDE, your doing her a favor, in the future she'll learn that she can't treat people like this and she'll always remember you as the one who set her straight so you know, your teaching her a lesson, I doubt anyone "cared" enough to do that for her right? Your not those wussy men who gives in to her pretty face... So be happy about that too. She'll thank you in the future.

 

But dude on a bigger note, what the hell is Ajax and whats with all this web 2.0 talk.

[DJMarky]

All good points.

 

You are right. I shouldn't feel bad, she had no respect for me the whole relationship. **** her.

 

Her past behaviour suggests she is a selfish bitch, I don't see that changing anytime soon. I doubt I will even call her after Japan. What do I have to say to her? I don't want to go through this again. I think I should keep her out of my life for good. I don't even know why there is still a part of me that wants her back, but there is. I need to stomp it.

 

OK WTF! W T F! NC BROKEN! I had started writing a defintion on AJAX when my phone went. Private number. Guess who the **** it was.

 

She started asking why I had been ignoring her calls and wanted to talk, then kept asking me loaded questions like whether I hated her, was I hurting, did I miss her or had thought about 'naughty' things abt her. I told her to stop asking that ****.

 

I then told her I wanted nothing to do with her, and she was hurt. She just said 'wow' then told me but she liked just talking to me. I said well sorry, you aren't a part of my life anymore. Probably should have hung up here, but I was intrigued with what she had to say.

 

Then she started talking about her new ****ing toy boy, I told her I thought he was a fag, like everyone else she had wrapped around her little finger, basically he has no spine, I said this probably pleased her as she likes using guys to do as she wants, I was probably one of the only guys that made a point of not being pushed around. This guy has already started buying her expensive gifts, dinners etc and apparently they aren't even officially dating. I was like I do not give a ****, told her that her friends were a bunch of immature posers. She said they were not. Then she went on to prove how much of a poser she is and told me about her night out and how much she drank, and the pills she took blah blah, I just kept mumbling cool, totally disinterested (which I was) and how all her ex's friends had met the new guy and thought he was so cool. I couldn't have cared less.

 

Then she asked me to do her a favour, she wanted me to burn the new season of entourage, I said no (she thinks she can ****ing use me??), get him to do it and she kept going please, please, please. ****ing no I will not.

 

She then called me emo, but I just said I was tired after windsurfing and was enjoying myself before she called. She then told me she hadn't slept with him yet, they had just slept in the same bed and made out (wow, very believable). I then just said, have a good night sleep, bye and hung up before she could finish talking. Wow, she ****ing annoys me.

 

Ok, now I will answer you question. Are you asking about AJAX cause I mentioned I was a web developer somewhere? I can't remember what I have posted here but I assume that is the case haha.

 

Anyways .. please, if you aren't interested in what AJAX is, do not read below. This topic is not exactly exciting.

 

AJAX, stands for asynchronous javascript and xml, which anyone can look up on the net. Many people assume the XML refers to extensible markup language, but it actually refers to the XMLHttpRequest which belongs to the DOM API.

 

Simply, AJAX stops the need for a page reload. You can perform operations on a database without refreshing the page. Normally there is a form that you input data (eg. writing this reply) you click submit, all the data is sent to another page and that page handles the data (error checks, inserting into database etc), which works fine. But sometimes you don't need this. For example, AJAX is used for some photo galleries (eg. facebook), when you click next it then fetches the next photo from the database using a XMLHttpRequest, then displays it using javscript. It became popular when used by google for one of their functions for searching, you would type something and then recommendations would pop up below. I did this for a member search function, where if you started typing 'Bac' it would look up in the database anyone with the username starting with that then show them (BackonTrack2) below the input field, but the page wouldn't reload everytime a query on the database was performed.

 

Also web 2.0 just seems to be a buzz phrase. Just refers to emerging technologies. If you are really interested, at work I use the Zend Framework (PHP framework), JQuery (Javascript library) and Doctrine (ORM) to create sites. That **** right there is web 2.0. Though you may not go for open source, in that cause you can use .NET.

 

I would normally never talk about work to people who weren't interested, but I was asked. I usually only save this information for awesome pick up lines.

 

[EDIT]

 

I really don't want her thinking I will burn this season of entourage for her, it's not because I think it's an effort, it's cause of the principle. Should I send her a text just saying, 'Look, I don't want to have contact with you. I am not burning that season for you, don't leave a DVD in my letterbox or anything. I can't believe you called using a private number. Leave me alone. Enjoy your time with those poser fags, **** off.' or maybe something less abusive?

 

Ahh ****, going to bed. Wow, something I am going to be thinking about as I stare at my ceiling. Why did she ****ing call me ahhhhhh?!?!

[BackonTrack2]

You still don't get it.

 

By you talking to HER, its what she wants, she can still DO WHAT SHE WANTS TO DO, which is toy with your brain. You honestly think she doesn't know what she's doing? She knows, its FUNNY to her, its even funny to me because god damn, that girl is cocky.

 

I like her now, I want to marry her.

 

LOL, stop it man, stop it, turn off your phone. She's right now laughing at you, and then tried to make you a friend again and have you burn her the entourage CD, the nerve of her to even ask. WOW, I love this girl.

 

I bet your goingn to do it too, and she knows it, you've just took away all your hardwork, by that one phone call. Back to square1 brother, it even shows in the tone of your post and I don't even know you personally but yet am I right or am I right?

 

Turn off your phone, cut your losses, your giving her what she wants and she's winning and your here mad as fawk and she's there laughing, getting fawked by the new guy.

 

LOL, I love that girl, she's a piece of work and you, well your a wussy man, doormat, weather you know it or not but thats the cold hard truth and I never lied before so believe me or not believe me.

 

I'm done dude, your on your own, I told you to run if she calls, run fast. You got a long way to go, months, your only pro-longing your own suffering. You are doing this to yourself.

 

Now I have to laugh at you and your going to be upset at these words, but HAHA, this is funny as fawk.

 

Stop talking to her, stop everything, cut off your phone and just burn the damn CD, I know you want too, LOL, this girl has you at the string of her finger tips. She's my kind of girl, I want to marry her.

 

POOR BABY, he's hurt and upset, and he even calls my boyfriend a FAG, He's so cute, and he's so nice, he is even going to burn me the entourage CD...

 

LOL

 

PS, She has you, she knows she has you, and now she's fawking with you because its funny.... And it is funny.. Now I have three men at my diposiable, my EX EX, who gives me money, my current dude who buys me things and takes me out and my EX who burns cd's for me. I love my life!!!!

 

PPS, You see the way I'm laughing at you? Thats how SHE's laughing at you.

 

Wait a minute, in all seriousness, the next step is, she is going to do ONE last thing to cause you to hate her/write her off for good. Then your going to VOW to NC OR

Your going to VOW to NC then break down and call her and she is going to tell you the Fawk off AND WHEN THAT HAPPENS oh man, your in it for a whole lot of hurt.

 

Your ex doesn't want YOU. She's not coming back no matter what. Heal yourself dude

 

YOU = Officially a DOOR MAT. A tampon, that's what you are NOW...

 

You do know that it gets worse right? The more you talk to her?

head these warnings or your going to be fawked.

 

Please someone step in, he's going off the cliff.

[DJMarky]

She called me using a private number, so she knew I was ignoring her calls so decided to use her home phone to call me. How the **** am I supposed to know it is her? I wouldn't have answered otherwise.

 

So she knows that I have been ignoring her calls. I can't help it if I answered the phone, I didn't assume she would try contact me by tricking me.

 

On the phone she asked if I was being emo, because I wasn't talking to her like I would have usually. I was giving one word replies and acting like I didn't care. Which I don't.

 

I won't answer private numbers from now on, only problem is my best mate calls me from his home phone all the time which is the same. I assumed it was him.

 

Also, I will not burn that dvd for her. She can go **** herself.

 

[EDIT]

 

Also, calling me a girly man is bull****. Not once have I cried or asked her to come back. I ignored her phone calls, I was sticking to NC and look at the **** she tried to pull. The reason it didn't work between us because I was not a doormat like her other boyfriends, who would let her get away with anything. Remember, I broke up with her TWICE. The first time she came crying back.

 

On the phone then I gave her the impressions I couldn't give a **** and was adamant that I wouldn't burn her the DVD. She even asked me why I was being like that.

 

You didn't exactly give me any advice, **** I can't help it if I didn't think, 'hey, she's resorted to tricking me into answering the phone'.

 

I will just go back to NC, and not even answer private numbers. I am tempted to tell her to stop contacting me, and that I can't believe she resorted to that.

 

Another issue is I have a party on Friday, that will end up at the same club that she is going to end up with her poser friends. I wish they'd just **** off.

[BackonTrack2]

What do you mean you can't believe she resorted to that.

Thats game Playing 101. Of-course she's going to resort to that. She's a FEMALE, everything is on the table.

If she could sky-write your name in the air and call you an ******* she'll do it.

 

If she can some how create a lephran, to come to your house and give you three wishes, she will do it.

If she could time travel and take your virginity, she will do it.

 

EVERYTHING/ANYTHING she will do it.

 

This chick has to get the message loud and clear to LEAVE you the FAWK alone. I mean this is your situation and well, I don't know what to tell you except you have a really messed up girl who is toying with you and she's going to do whatever she can because she can do it and nothing really "bad" is going to happen to her other than her fawking with you mentaility.

 

I mean if your done with her, tell her "Yo, Don't call me again, I'm serious, I'm going to contact the COPS if you keep harassing me, I promise you"

 

Then actually follow through on that promise, my last ex went as far as having her cop friend call me and ask me about some randomness just so I could get the picture, I mean in all honesty thta was not necessary due to the fact that I only cursed her out whenever she contacted ME or my FAMILY so I don't know why she did that, I think it was her parents who did it but ofcourse she played victium and painted me as the bad guy but whatever, you know actually reading your story and comparing it to mine makes me believe that I am the one who broke up with HER, even though she was the one who was cheatting on me, its almost as if, she couldn't figure out how to work me so she went and started doing her own thing and then kept me there for once she figured out how to deal with it.....

 

But yeah, I'm glad I'm talking to you personally because I'm learning more, and I have come to the conclusion that wow, I wasn't really a girly man, It makes me feel better, I even feel more better NOW for the simple fact that, she changed her relationship status less than 48 hours after I unblocked her even though she hasn't changed her profile in like 11 months which means she still feels something, even if its HATE, which means, HAHA, she's stupid, HAHA, she still loves me in some shape or form even AFTER being leaving me, HAHA. (sorry thats random)

 

Anyway, I mean, you just going to have to be angry and deal with it, or if you don't want to deal with it, go to the cops, thats pretty much the last thing you can do, that will give her the message loud and clear, eitherway, she's not your girlfriend anymore so I clearly don't see why you are still talking to her espcially if she's making you this mad.

 

Just ignore her and she will go away, thats all I can really say and yeah man your going to be SOO upset for a WHILE, long time, but whatever Japan is coming up so have fun and prepare for that.

 

And the reason I bashed you is because when she did call, you wanted to hear what she has to say, you should of just hung up the phone when she called, as soon as you heard her voice.

 

To summarize, she has NOTHING TO TELL YOU YOU WANT TO HEAR, NOTHING. All she can do is fawk with you mentaility MORE and MORE.

 

I tell you again, Run Forrest, Run

[Goatsbreath]

I will just go back to NC, and not even answer private numbers. I am tempted to tell her to stop contacting me, and that I can't believe she resorted to that.

 

Yes, please do tell her to stop contacting you. This girl is amazing in her blatant disregard for anyone's feelings but her own.

 

I don't know, in my opinion, in this case, with this girl, it might be in your benefit to right her a letter stating your disposition. What you expect from a relationship, how at this time she is insufficient but you wish her the best. Don't be mean, just honest in your expectations of what a relationship is and how she does not meet these expectations.

 

I would say confront her on the high road. Use careful, guarded, and non-sarcastic words but make it clear you do not think enough of her to ever lower yourself to have contact with her again.

 

Maybe something like this....

 

I realize you do not have a suitable foundation for intimacy, and this lack causes substantial and escalating dysfunction in your life. I sincerely hope nothing bad happens to you as you continue in these patterns. I also hope for you that you will be able to overcome your problems and live up to the kind of person you could be. At this time, i do not have enough room in my life to afford the time, energy, and space that these behaviors waste; but i wish you the best.

 

Well, something along those lines........close the door.

[DJMarky]

I didn't mean to jump at you Backontrack, but I thought I played it well, and guess I am pissed off that I got it wrong.

 

I am seriously tempted to contact her just to tell her to leave me alone, but don't know if this goes against NC.

 

Thanks for the advice goatsbreath.

 

Should I use email, sms, phone? I want to get it over with. I hate having to screen calls and ****, I just want her to **** off for good.

[Goatsbreath]

do it old school, pen and paper so it floats around in her life for a long time. Then one day she will stumble across it when shes old and her boobs are sagging and shes lost her spell over man.

[DJMarky]

Hmm, now i just need to think about what I can write.

 

I can either make it long so that when she re-reads it it will bring up memories and she will think she royally ****ed up, or short and sweet.

[BackonTrack2]

Hey,

 

Stick to the Plan, nothing long-winded, don't try and be orginal, your mind is messed up so you'll only make it worst...

 

Something like this, what Goatsbreath said exactly word for word.

 

"I realize you do not have a suitable foundation for intimacy, and this lack causes substantial and escalating dysfunction in your life. I sincerely hope nothing bad happens to you as you continue in these patterns. I also hope for you that you will be able to overcome your problems and live up to the kind of person you could be. At this time, i do not have enough room in my life to afford the time, energy, and space that these behaviors waste; but i wish you the best."

 

That would do, just perfect, take it word for word, and thats it - ps, that above text is kind of OVER-KILL, its going to really mess up her head but hey, she deserves it.

[DJMarky]

Too late, sorry. I just wrote her the longest email on how much I loved her and would do anything to get her back. I told her I cried all night thinking about her after she called. Hopefully this will get in touch with her sensitive side and she will want me back.

 

PSYCH!

 

HAHA! Kidding guys, should have waited for you guys to respond, but I think you would have disowned me instead.

 

Anyways, Cheers for the help.

 

I think I will just email it, I cbf hand writing it. Means I have to either post it to her, or hand it in person and right now I don't want to look at her.

 

Basically this is what I have written so far, just a few tweaks to what was said earlier:

 

"

 

Look ****, you have seriously got to stop contacting me.

 

I realise you do not have a suitable foundation for intimacy, and this lack causes substantial and escalating dysfunction in your life. You were never very engaged in our relationship, and never viewed my opinion as worthy. Of course, I have discussed this numerous times. I sincerely hope nothing bad happens to you as you continue in this pattern. I also hope that you will be able to overcome your problems and live up to the kind of person you could be. At this time, I do not have enough room in my life to afford the time, energy, and space that these behaviours waste, however I wish you the best.

 

"

 

I'll wait for you guys before I do anything.

 

that above text is kind of OVER-KILL, its going to really mess up her head but hey, she deserves it.

 

Perfect.

[BackonTrack2]

wait until she stops calling and starts emailing, might take a while

[nature]

She is trying to get a reaction out of you, and you have been giving her a reaction. Thus, she knows she still has you hooked. Whenever you give her an angry reaction, it still reaffirms to her, that you are hooked. She knows she still has your heart, because you are showing you she still has it. I'm a woman. I know.

 

Indifference is the best revenge. Anger does nothing, other than showing you still care. We don't get angry at those we don't care about.

 

This is what I suggest you do. DO NOT send her a letter or an email telling her not to contact you. That will just reaffirm to her that you still care and she still has you hooked. I guarantee it.

 

Let things lie for now. And from now on, answer the phone if it is a blocked number. Answer in an upbeat, happy sounding, out of breath from running to grab it because you are in a hurry, voice. Fake it. When you hear that it is her on the other end of the line, quickly say, "Oh hi --- Sorry, I'm just waiting for another call and thought it was them, so I don't have time to chat." If she starts to say anything, be polite and breezy, but rushed sounding, and say "Sorry, I really have to go, but we'll catch up again soon!!" Then say bye. It will bother the crap out of her.

 

Then wait for her to call again. If she does, answer in an upbeat, happy voice again. Tell her you've been soooooooo busy getting ready for Japan and have so much to do!!! While she's chatting away, walk around your house and act like you are doing stuff, giving her the impression that you are not totally involved in the conversation. A few times, make some noise like shuffling things around, then say, "oh sorry, what did you say?". Finally she will more than likely say, you sound busy, do you want to go? That is when you say in a sweet, nice voice, "oh I'm sorry...yes I really am busy and should get going, but it was nice to chat"! This will bother the crap out of her.

 

Do not ever, ever, ever mention her boyfriend. If she mentions him, do not call him any names as you've been doing. Those reactions are reaffirming to her that you are jealous, and therefore she still has your heart. Just sound positive and say things like, "oh that's great, good for you, wow, sounds like things are going really well for you, blah blah blah". That kind of BS. This willl bother the crap out of her.

 

This breezy indifference will start to hit home with her. She will start to question whether she still has you. This will affect her more than any of your anger, or your ideas about writing her an email, etc. Do not tell her not to contact you. Just play it cool and be breezy. Sound busy and excited for Japan! Go on and on about it to her and talk about all the amazing, fun things you have planned there. It will drive her crazy.

 

Honestly, I'm a girl, and I know how a woman thinks!!!!

[DJMarky]

Thanks nature!

 

I wanted a female input (not that backontrack or goatsbreath weren't helping) just to get an idea on what was going through her head.

 

I haven't got a call from her today. I don't take my phone to the beach, but when I get home there is usually a missed call from her, or a msg, but not today. Maybe she got the idea from last night?

 

However, next time (if there is one) we talk I will remember this for future reference.

 

Just to clarify.

 

Should I still screen her calls and not answer if they are from her? Or should I now answer them but act friendly but busy so I can get off the phone?

 

Also with the entourage dvd, I don't want to do it just because of principle. I think the best course is to just tell her im too busy. Like I do not want to do her any favours. I was actually planning on snapping the dvd, or leaving a note on it like '**** off' if she left it at my house, but I guess this shows she still gets an emotion out of me, so maybe I should just tell her I can't do it cause im busy?

 

And yeh .. there is a high probability that we will end up at the same club together tomorrow night. She will be with her toy boy and his friends, and I will just be with mates. It's going to be difficult acting as if everything is fine if he is purposely (I know he will) being possessive (arms around her) and if they are trashed probably pashing infront of me. I will want to run over and fly kick his head, but not the best action.

 

It's going to be hard to act as if it doesn't bother me.

[nature]

Do not answer her calls if you see it as her number. Just ignore and do not return any of her msg's. But if she calls from a restricted number, answer. But then act surprised it is her and that you thought it would be someone else. This will really bother her. She will wonder who you thought it was. If she asks, just say..."oh just a friend. You don't know "them". Using "them" instead of he/she will make her assume it's a she.

 

Nooooo do not leave a nasty note about the CD. Bad move. Just very sweetly and nicely say you do not have time to do it for her. You are just so busy right now packing up and getting ready for Japan. Do not call her about this. Do not do anything. Wait until she calls you and point blank asks you again. If she drops off a CD, do not call her or say anything to her. Just put her blank CD in a safe place, and when she calls about it asking if you've burned it, casually say, "oh yes I got your CD, but ---- I'm so sorry. I'm just too busy to do it for you right now. Maybe when I get back from Japan. But if you want the blank CD back, I'll leave it on my front step for you to pick up."

 

Be as sweet as pie. Do not call her ever. Do not email her ever. Do not answer her calls if you see it is her number. Do not return her msg's. Only answer the phone if it is a restricted number. Then breezily act like you thought is was "someone" else calling. Always sound upbeat, happy, excited about your trip and busy, busy, busy.

 

Do not go to the Club tomorrow night. Dumb move. Stupid. I don't care if your friends are going. Do not go. Stay home and sulk or whatever. Just do not go. It will boost her ego thinking you are there to see her. Even if you are not. Because as women, we know, that if a man doesn't want to see us, he will avoid a place at any cost. It will bother the crap out of her if you are not there. She will wonder where you are. If your friends can not go and go to another club with you, that would be great. But if they still insist on going to that club, let them go. But do not go. This will bother the crap out of her. She will wonder where you are. Her brain will start spinning. She will start thinking. And she will concur that maybe you are on a date or with another woman somewhere.

 

I don't care how much you want to go to that freaking club. DO NOT go. That is the stupidest thing you could do. Sacrifice one night out with the boys to that club, to save your pride and self worth. Do not go.