Isis1808 Posted January 31, 2009 Share Posted January 31, 2009 Im not sure if this is the right place for this post, but here i go. Ive been with my partner for about 2 and a half years, i still love him dearly, but i cant seem to get over his bad breath. His dental hygiene his that of a 8 year old, he forgets to brush in the morning and there are times at night that he doesn't brush cause hes just too tired and falls asleep. I have to be on top of him everyday so that he brushes and sometimes that doesn't even work. Even when he brushes his breath is intolerable. Its gotten to the point where we don't kiss, i don't even like to talk to close to him. I'm the total opposite of him in that i feel like i have to brush 2 a day for two minutes and i brush the roof of my mouth and my tongue. On the days that he "forgets" to brush im disgusted all day and a bit upset. Honestly, i feel like this is all his mothers fault since as a kid she should of been on top of him about his hygiene and she wasnt. I know this, cause hes told me that he was a dirty kid during his adolescence to teenage years, not bathing for days, wearing dirty underwear, not brushing for days... All this is a real turn off and its really getting to me. How can i deal with this without hurting his feelings? I really need help with this cause i feel like this will ultimately end our relationship and i also don't want our son picking up on those disgusting bad habits. Link to post Share on other sites
Ramrod Posted January 31, 2009 Share Posted January 31, 2009 You made a child with this man? Egads! Honest direct communication works best. Be direct. Tell him it is rude, inconsiderate and discourteous to not bathe and MAINTAIN a certail level of hygiene inside of a relationship. Be direct, not overly critical, but layout what he's missing when he's too selfish and lazy to was his *ss properly!!! Then be vigilate. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Isis1808 Posted January 31, 2009 Author Share Posted January 31, 2009 I tried that, but it seems like he just doesnt care and just "forgets". He wasnt like that at first, i think hes showing me his true colors now that we are moved in together. The first time i noticed it i was already pregnant and what he was doing was rinsing his mouth since he says that if he brushes at night theres no need to brush in the morning. I said that was nasty and that he still had to brush in the morning so he started doing that for the first week then it all fell right back to his old habits. Thanks for the advice ill try this approach again and be as direct and honest as possible without being critical. Link to post Share on other sites
Ramrod Posted January 31, 2009 Share Posted January 31, 2009 It's the bacteria from his stomach lining which causes the halatosis in the morning. Geesh, you have you work cut out. Maybe fighting fire with fire. Let your breath get bad, go a few days with out washing your underarms or some of his favorite places andf then you two can cut a deal which will satisfy you both. Other than that you might try public shaming. It worked for the puritans. Link to post Share on other sites
Enema Posted February 1, 2009 Share Posted February 1, 2009 I'd just say it point blank. First thing in the morning and before bed: "Your breath stinks like a week old corpse, please go brush" Then, positive reinforcement when he remembers. Link to post Share on other sites
tinke Posted February 2, 2009 Share Posted February 2, 2009 You would be doing him a huge favor to stay on top of this, since you of course, are not the only person he speaks to. Since you've tried the gentle approach, it may be time to give him the facts. Also, add your disapproval of his lax attitude. If you are turned off, surely others must be. Who else will tell him but you? Maybe it's time for a dental appt. Link to post Share on other sites
sb129 Posted February 2, 2009 Share Posted February 2, 2009 Resident LS dentist here. Bad breath is caused by MOUTH bacteria, not that from the stomach lining! It is particularly foul smelling if a person has gum disease, and if your man is lax with his dental hygiene then the chances of him having early to moderate gum disease are very high. Bacteria builds up on your teeth, tongue, gums and cheeks overnight. If you sleep with your mouth open, your mouth dries out and you don't have the same level of saliva flow to wash the bacteria away, therefore more builds up and it smells worse. These kind of habits would repulse me. Its not only gross and smelly, but its bad for him and he is at higher risk of having dental diseases like gum disease and cavities which can be costly to fix in the long term and also lead to problems with how your teeth look. Sounds like he is LONG overdue a trip to see the dentist and the hygienist. CherryBlossom35 is a dental hygienist- those people are dynamite at making peoples teeth sparkly clean and giving them the right advice to keep them that way. Just don't kiss him till he goes! Link to post Share on other sites
Posco_Proudfoot Posted February 2, 2009 Share Posted February 2, 2009 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2MaCXVSwec4 Sing him this song every time his mouth smells like somebody took a dump in it. Seriously, there is no reason for him to be this filthy. His breath is the sign of other problems I imagine. When is the last time he went to the dentist? Doesn't he have a job? Everybody has to put up with this. He can get a yuck mouth stigma with people avoiding him. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Isis1808 Posted February 6, 2009 Author Share Posted February 6, 2009 Thanks so much, I really appreciate this feedback. Tinke, I have been on top of this, but after a while of you saying the same thing to someone and it still doesnt register in their heads, i give up because its just too frustrating. Im definitely going to give him the facts now that i know a bit more, and will surely research it a lot more. Sb129 thanks for the info, i didnt know that it could potentially be that bad. I know that the last time he went to the dentist, the dentist he was told that he had a lot of work that needed to be done. He went a few times after that but never went again. I would imagine the dentist told him this, but he decided to omit some details. I havent kissed him in a while cause it disgusts me, but now im worried about my son, since he sometimes shares eating utensils or cup with him. Posco, he does have a job but im assuming that his co-workers dont avoid him or tell him anything. Im just sooo tired of this and once something disgusts you about someone, thats all you think about when you see them. Link to post Share on other sites
mr314man Posted February 6, 2009 Share Posted February 6, 2009 Take a shot glass of hydrogen peroxide. Swish it allover your mouth. Tastes horrible. DO NOT SWALLOW. SPIT !! It kills all the bad breath bacteria and is good for the gums. Link to post Share on other sites
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