love or lust? just for discussion

[FERSHEEZY]

so how do you know when you are truly and honestly in love?.........not just lust?

any stories and/or opinions would be fabulous

[Jamie31]

There is definitely a distinguishable difference between love and lust. Most people say that when you are in love, you will just know. And I know that was true in my case. I never knew true love until I met my husband. And it was totally unexpected. I had dated guys in the past who I thought I loved, but when I met my husband and truly fell in love, I knew that the others weren't true love. Love is an overwhelming feeling. There's no way to describe it in words. You just know.

[Kelebek]

What's that saying? "Lust is when you love what's on the outside, and love is when you lust after what's inside."

 

I've often wondered about this myself. I think that when some people meet someone they truly connect with, they are shocked by their strong feelings and think it's love at first sight. But it's just lust. Jamie's right, when you fall in love, you will just KNOW. If you're not sure whether you're in love with someone, it means you just aren't. There's no doubt in your mind when you are in love.

 

I'm head over heels in lust at the moment - there's a lot to be said for lust you know!!!!!! Lol I have only known this guy a few months, and wondered if I could be in love - but the fact that I'm wondering about it means that I'm not. That doesn't mean that I won't be in the future. I think lust is a very important foundation for love to grow on. If you are not in lust as well as being in love then what's the point? Wouldn't it just be boring? This is why I would never go out with someone I wasn't SURE that I had that spark for, i.e a friend. I know many people build wonderful relationships upon friendship, but I'm just one of those people that that particular method just doesn't work for. I have to have that instant spark, that connection that leaves you breathless, when you wonder at your fortune over meeting such a person, and when your heart still bangs everytime they enter the room, or even just entering your thoughts.

 

I met someone a few months ago and we had one of those extremely rare, truly magical nights where you talk until sunrise, and don't get bored of each other. That spark hasn't left yet, and I don't see it leaving any time soon - I hope. With a connection that strong, I knew this had to be something different, and it is. The friendship comes as the feelings deepen. You can work on it. (I know some people will disagree, and say that you can't teach yourself to like someone either - and I agree, but with a connection so strong, a friendship has never been a problem so far.)

 

But I truly believe that you can't work on feeling a spark. You can't teach yourself to lust after someone. I have a very close guy-friend, who I adore and have often wished I liked in that way, as he's always there for me, and we get along so well. But I just don't fancy him, I'm afraid. It would be like seeing my brother or something.

 

But you can grow a friendship. Lust before love, not the other way around - that's the way to go.

 

What does anyone else think? It's quite interesting.