DEEPDOWNUNDER Posted February 2, 2009 Share Posted February 2, 2009 Hello all, Im 24 and have recently found a 26 yr old girl that i love. However there is a few things bothering me. One is the fact that she has been with a pretty few guys in the past amounting to 13, which does turn me off and have not yet been able to forget about that. I guess being raised in a traditional household make me feel grossed about her little army of men. Number two, I occasionally get a feeling she is `easy`. She gets drunk really easy and I am not sure if she is truly commited. Number three, she wants to go to the UK which may mean a long distance relationship for us for a year. I dont know i want to take the risk of going all the way there to later break up with her. She has occasionally mentioned that she will wait for me, but how can i trust her to be faithful after hearing her past and knowing that she can be sorta easy. I love her and I often feel i want to marry her, but sometimes i just feel i cant.. Also she occasionally gets phonecalls from a number of her ex`s and never reveals my existance. What should i do ? should i leave or pursue ? Please help... Link to post Share on other sites
hunkahunkaburninlove Posted February 2, 2009 Share Posted February 2, 2009 Downunder, I think you kinda answered your own question. You need to read the threads in here and on other infidelity sights. You will find them rife with examples of girls who get drunk and will basically screw anyone. They all blame the alcohol. But alcohol doesn't make you cheat. It only reduces your inhibitions so you end up doing what you wanted to in the first place but knew it was wrong. Tell her the truth. Tell her that you love her, but that her drinking, secrecy with her ex's, and the fact that she never mentions that you and her are couple, to them, tells you that she is not serious about your relationship. Tell her that you feel you can't trust her when she drinks. Tell her that she might wait for you. But that you can't believe that she will not sleep with other men while you are apart. Then let her try to convince you that she can change. Ask her if she would quit drinking completely for you? Link to post Share on other sites
Untouchable_Fire Posted February 2, 2009 Share Posted February 2, 2009 I love her and I often feel i want to marry her, but sometimes i just feel i cant.. Also she occasionally gets phonecalls from a number of her ex`s and never reveals my existance. What should i do ? should i leave or pursue ? Please help... Many people will try to tell you that how many guys she has been with doesn't matter, but don't fall for that lie. If she is easy... that means she doesn't have any self esteem! You don't want to get stuck with that one my friend. Here is what I would do. Friendzone her. Does she have any friends that are worth your attention? Either way.... keep looking for someone else, and don't trust her! Link to post Share on other sites
nikki123 Posted February 3, 2009 Share Posted February 3, 2009 Sounds like you have a lot of doubts. Perhaps you should maintain a friendship with this women until she can meet your needs. Don't judge her by the number of sexual partners, but try to understand her reasoning for have 13 partners. talkingingchick.com Link to post Share on other sites
Stung Posted February 4, 2009 Share Posted February 4, 2009 well, this one's a snap. leave, OP. walk away. do NOT pursue marriage. no, not because she has had 13 sex partners...seriously, man, grow up. 13 sex partners at 26 is NOT 'an army of men,' and most if not all of those might have been people she cared about or thought she was embarking on a serious relationship with; and whatever the case, what's past is past. the reason you should walk away is that it's painfully obvious that you don't respect this girl. you call her easy, you make disparaging remarks about her, how she drinks, whether her character is sound and trustworthy, and you feel 'grossed out' by her experiences. cut her loose and walk away. she deserves better. Link to post Share on other sites
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