sington Posted February 6, 2009 Share Posted February 6, 2009 About 2 years ago I should have left my husband but gave him a second chance. It started with him looking at porn for around 4 hours a day while I was at college, then he would expect me to help him with the housework when I got home. Then he started flirting with my good friend and showing off to her about how much porn he watched when I was not around. (He obviously thought it would be a turn on for her) I tried to save face by not showing my anger. He then started telling me and anyone who would listen about how sexy his co-worker was. (Now I have to say that I didn't have a particularly low self esteem at the time because I worked out 5times a week at the gym and the pool and was always getting compliments.) I was content with my self image and where I was in life and kept telling myself and others how happy I was so I didn't see the signs. THEN.... we were at a party and he was avoiding me, later on when I was pretty drunk, I found him in the back garden alone with this co-worker they weren't engaged in anything but they had seen me coming. At another party he asked a different co-worker to sleep with him right in front of me. So I started to think things through. Sorry this is so long. I was devistated because I had always been loving and sexual to him and this is what I get? I felt really humiliated especially since I kept telling people how happy I was and how great my husband was. I didn't leave because I was studying and we have 2 kids that I need to support. I got depressed and he seemed genuinely remorseful for what he had done to me, he agreed to lay off the porn(because that is where it all started) for ever and said he would no longer be so disrespectful. And he stuck to it but... I found that he has been looking at porn and deleting the history, so now I think what else is he lying about and should I leave now before I am hurt again or wait and see how things go. Link to post Share on other sites
Geishawhelk Posted February 6, 2009 Share Posted February 6, 2009 No. Don't leave. Make him leave. You've given him plenty of chances. Burned once? He's a fool. Burned twice? You're the fool. How much more do you think you should take before you do tell him to go get his kicks elsewhere? The kids will be fine. Better two (separated) happy parents, than 2 (together) miserable ones. trust me. Link to post Share on other sites
sopredictable Posted February 12, 2009 Share Posted February 12, 2009 I agree, make him leave. The kids will be fine, my parents were extremly unhappy when i was a child and it got physical. All I thought was why dont they just get a divorce...your kids will want you to be happy. You have put up with too much to keep waisting your time on a man who does not appreciate you. You deserve to be happy and it will be hard but your life will be better knowing you dont have to worry about "what is he doing" all the time. Link to post Share on other sites
snoopy girl Posted February 12, 2009 Share Posted February 12, 2009 sington girl, i know how you feel, and i too have posted many stories of how to fix my problems, okay....... you love the guy and he loves you, the one thing i did that works was. i caught him watching porn on our tv in our bedroom, and he had told me many times he would never watch it again, well, i don't care if he watches it just not in our home, i have children,and i don't want to see him watching it in front of me. so i took the dvd player and smashed it on the floor right then and there. told him if he did it again i would smash the tv. or computer or any other thing that he had....... let me tell you no more porn in my house. Link to post Share on other sites
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