james Posted April 24, 2000 Share Posted April 24, 2000 well yesterday was my x-wife's birthday and of course Easter.. I spent it with family, mine and had a really good time. well later last night I called her Mom to wish my e-x the best on her day. Her mom said cool... we have been divorced for 12 years now ... I still think of her often but then I was really in love with her... I have made no other contacts with her other than this. Was I wrong??? Link to post Share on other sites
Tony T Posted April 25, 2000 Share Posted April 25, 2000 There is no right or wrong here. You have to do what makes you feel good. What you did was not wrong, in my opinion, but highly unusual considering you have no other contact with her. However, it is generally accepted that a divorce is a divorce. It is rare that divorced couples, unless children are involved, communicate at all after a period. After twelve years, I would assume one or the other or both of you have moved on considerably in life. It is doubtful your ex is impressed or touched by your thoughtfulness...especially if she is seeing someone else or has remarried. But, again, if it makes you feel good do it. You know yourself and your ex better than anyone reading the posts on this forum. P.S. If you are still thinking of her often after 12 years, you have serious separation anxiety or abandonment issues which you must address with a professional counsellor. A passing thought once in a while would be very appropriate, but beyond that is not in the normal range. Link to post Share on other sites
james Posted April 26, 2000 Share Posted April 26, 2000 Tony thanks for the response.. I don't think of her often at all, it was just that Easter and her birthday fell on the same day and I (in thought) put the two together...I had had a great day and sitting at home put 2n2 together... I have always loved her and prob. always will... so it was really just a thought.. thanks anyway There is no right or wrong here. You have to do what makes you feel good. What you did was not wrong, in my opinion, but highly unusual considering you have no other contact with her. However, it is generally accepted that a divorce is a divorce. It is rare that divorced couples, unless children are involved, communicate at all after a period. After twelve years, I would assume one or the other or both of you have moved on considerably in life. It is doubtful your ex is impressed or touched by your thoughtfulness...especially if she is seeing someone else or has remarried. But, again, if it makes you feel good do it. You know yourself and your ex better than anyone reading the posts on this forum. P.S. If you are still thinking of her often after 12 years, you have serious separation anxiety or abandonment issues which you must address with a professional counsellor. A passing thought once in a while would be very appropriate, but beyond that is not in the normal range. Link to post Share on other sites
moviefan Posted April 26, 2000 Share Posted April 26, 2000 Hey you should go see that movie, High Fidelity, it's about long lost relationships and wanting to reconnect with ex's. Tony thanks for the response.. I don't think of her often at all, it was just that Easter and her birthday fell on the same day and I (in thought) put the two together...I had had a great day and sitting at home put 2n2 together... I have always loved her and prob. always will... so it was really just a thought.. thanks anyway Link to post Share on other sites
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