Handsome men = a rarity

[Touche]

Since when is that little frucked up shrimp of a man Tom Cruise the criteria for what a woman like me, finds attractive?

 

Are you kidding me?

 

Puhleeze. I turned down an Oscar winning actor at one point in my dating life. It's really true.

 

I fell for men who weren't full of themselves. Height mattered not to me. I kind of went for the shy ones actually. As long as they were smart and down to earth, I was right there.

 

So, kashmir, although I wouldn't sleep with Tom Cruise for any amount of money in this world, I might date/sleep with a man like you if I were single.

[lord alfred douglas]

If one looks back into history, one could be excused for thinking that women were mere observers. Whilst it's true that every great man had a mother, that seems to be the full extent of their involvement.

 

Biology makes women indispensable, and they continue to exploit their luck to the fullest. Then again, maybe childbirth is enough punishment for sitting on their arses while men write humanity's next chapter.

yes...yes....you understand...its almost like ive known you for two years...

[kashmir]

My point is that handsome and decent men are a rarity because women's standards are so high, and they have a right to be high since they still have a flock of decent guys that just fall short of the standards in case they don't find a hot, successful, and interesting guy soon. I'm saying that maybe there ARE handsome guys around you that you just aren't noticing because they have one or two features that aren't your preference or liking.

[Isolde]

My point is that handsome and decent men are a rarity because women's standards are so high

 

Maybe this is partly true

 

and they have a right to be high since they still have a flock of decent guys that just fall short of the standards in case they don't find a hot, successful, and interesting guy soon.

 

No, wrong, I have no options right now and I would never keep guys around as a backup, that's mean.

 

I'm saying that maybe there ARE handsome guys around you that you just aren't noticing because they have one or two features that aren't your preference or liking

 

This maybe used to be true of me but my tastes have become a little broader than they used to be. And I have never, ever turned down a guy because he had the wrong hair color or whatever. The guys I turned down for not being attracted to, it was an issue of not being attracted to them on a major, major level.

[39388]

Just look at the last few pages - these women saying that not even Tom Cruise is good enough for them. I agree with Carhill that if he really met them and hit on them they would totally fall for them, but it makes it that much harder for below-average to average looking guys like me who are also shy to expect any woman to even accept a first date. If they theoretically wouldn't sleep with Tom Cruise, how can I expect them to sleep with or date me?

It really is tough. I don't have a lot of features women find physically attractive. I'm not 0/10 ugly so some women will befried me, but I'm certainly no more than a 3/10. Academic intelligence I have more than almost anyone, but that is not an advantage dating. In fact, it might scare off some. I'm a very competitive guy, but this dating game is a bit too competitive for me.

 

I believe that looks are what most people go after above all, regardless of what people say on here or even tell me to my face. Actions speak louder than words.

[Tomcat33]

this thread moves too fast...

 

I agree

 

I do find woman more boring than men personality-wise as a rule. It has something to do with their biological nature...you know..just a hole that needs filling basically

 

But on the other hand Im constantly surprised by women precisely because I have such a low opinion of them

 

 

LordAD, you might be gay and the last to know this.

 

I suspect Tom wishes he was a good candidate. He can believe in personal power but can't make it honestly happen, at least in the world of real power where business and finance reside.

 

But it would almost make sense for them to take over a sect like Scientology (in hollywood only) because of the level of financial power and influence. Like it or not a guy like Tom Cruise does have some power with mass audiences, he's lost some cred but any of those big name stars can really manipulate the masses if they want to.

 

 

Touche:sick: Since when is that little frucked up shrimp of a man Tom Cruise the criteria for what a woman like me, finds attractive?

 

Are you kidding me?

 

Puhleeze. I turned down an Oscar winning actor at one point in my dating life. It's really true.

 

I fell for men who weren't full of themselves. Height mattered not to me. I kind of went for the shy ones actually. As long as they were smart and down to earth, I was right there.

 

 

So TRUE Touche. Ewwww I would turn him down in a split second if given the chance. I honestly would.

 

My point is that handsome and decent men are a rarity because women's standards are so high, and they have a right to be high since they still have a flock of decent guys that just fall short of the standards in case they don't find a hot, successful, and interesting guy soon. I'm saying that maybe there ARE handsome guys around you that you just aren't noticing because they have one or two features that aren't your preference or liking.

 

 

You know what Kasmir it boils down to what you are used to, when you've had the taste of having it all in a mate you don't want to settle for less. That's my afflcition...but I don't think you are completely off.

 

If I recall correctly, Cruise isn't that short, something like 5'7", although the media likes to joke about him being 5'4".

 

 

I swear to god he seems like he is 5,4 I met him a few years back when I worked in tv and I remember walking into the room that recording live and I could not see him because he was burreid alive in a sea of teenage girls that towered over him. I was SHOCKED at how tiny this man is. SHOCKED.

[Touche]

You don't get it Kashmir. You obviously never will.

 

It's easier for you, like many others, to blame women and their "impossibly high standards" right? They're so damn superficial. Men aren't though, right?

 

Do you think for one second if I weren't half way attractive I'd even HAVE a choice in men? Are you serious?

 

If I were fat and ugly and stupid well nope - no one would look at me. I speak 3 languages, I'm a college graduate, I'm thin and not too hard on the eyes.

 

But guess what? I remember when I was ugly, too shy and didn't have a college degree.

 

You think men wanted to get to know me for my "insides?" Think again, honey.

 

But you know what I did date men who were considered "undesirable." Those who were short, fat, not successful, etc. etc.

 

I was looking for a REAL man.

 

Do you even think I'd have all the options that I did if I were ugly and fat?

 

No, effing way!

 

Thank god I was ok looking right? Thank god I was halfway smart, right?

 

I gave all kinds of men chances. WAY more men than would have given ME a chance if I were fat, ugly and dumb.

 

So save your pity.

[39388]

My point is that handsome and decent men are a rarity because women's standards are so high, and they have a right to be high since they still have a flock of decent guys that just fall short of the standards in case they don't find a hot, successful, and interesting guy soon. I'm saying that maybe there ARE handsome guys around you that you just aren't noticing because they have one or two features that aren't your preference or liking.

You are right on. I live in a large city and this is what I see time after time. A lot of women around here have very high physical standards for a man and would rather remain single than date a 5-6, let alone something much lower.

[Saint Valentine]

this thread moves too fast...

Strange. There must be some men posting.

 

For the men posting: please slow things down to an acceptable and manageable pace for the women. Thank you.

[Isolde]

You don't get it Kashmir. You obviously never will.

 

It's easier for you, like many others, to blame women and their "impossibly high standards" right? They're so damn superficial. Men aren't though, right?

 

Do you think for one second if I weren't half way attractive I'd even HAVE a choice in men? Are you serious?

 

If I were fat and ugly and stupid well nope - no one would look at me. I speak 3 languages, I'm a college graduate, I'm thin and not too hard on the eyes.

 

But guess what? I remember when I was ugly, too shy and didn't have a college degree.

 

You think men wanted to get to know me for my "insides?" Think again, honey.

 

But you know what I did date men who were considered "undesirable." Those who were short, fat, not successful, etc. etc.

 

I was looking for a REAL man.

 

Do you even think I'd have all the options that I did if I were ugly and fat?

 

No, effing way!

 

Thank god I was ok looking right? Thank god I was halfway smart, right?

 

I gave all kinds of men chances. WAY more men than would have given ME a chance if I were fat, ugly and dumb.

 

So save your pity.

 

This post is right-on.

[confused_2008]

You don't get it Kashmir. You obviously never will.

 

It's easier for you, like many others, to blame women and their "impossibly high standards" right? They're so damn superficial. Men aren't though, right?

 

Do you think for one second if I weren't half way attractive I'd even HAVE a choice in men? Are you serious?

 

If I were fat and ugly and stupid well nope - no one would look at me. I speak 3 languages, I'm a college graduate, I'm thin and not too hard on the eyes.

 

But guess what? I remember when I was ugly, too shy and didn't have a college degree.

 

You think men wanted to get to know me for my "insides?" Think again, honey.

 

But you know what I did date men who were considered "undesirable." Those who were short, fat, not successful, etc. etc.

 

I was looking for a REAL man.

 

Do you even think I'd have all the options that I did if I were ugly and fat?

 

No, effing way!

 

Thank god I was ok looking right? Thank god I was halfway smart, right?

 

I gave all kinds of men chances. WAY more men than would have given ME a chance if I were fat, ugly and dumb.

 

So save your pity.

 

I think this is generally true. I believe women are more forgiving of physical features than men. I mean, how many overweight guys do you see with great looking women? A LOT more than handsome men with "fat chicks". Just the phrases commonly used tell the tale. Women like the big guys cuz they're teddy bears or jolly or whatever (okay bad words but I can't think what I mean ) and guys just refer to them as "fat chicks." Sad, but I believe it's true.

 

*i'm a guy btw

[confused_2008]

Strange. There must be some men posting.

 

For the men posting: please slow things down to an acceptable and manageable pace for the women. Thank you.

 

LMAO. Sorry, but that was funny.

[Isolde]

I think Touche speaks for a lot of women when she says she gave more men a chance, than would have given her a chance if she were fat/ugly/whatever.

 

Even for the pickier of us women, I STILL think this is the case!

[Tomcat33]

You don't get it Kashmir. You obviously never will.

 

It's easier for you, like many others, to blame women and their "impossibly high standards" right? They're so damn superficial. Men aren't though, right?

 

Do you think for one second if I weren't half way attractive I'd even HAVE a choice in men? Are you serious?

 

If I were fat and ugly and stupid well nope - no one would look at me. I speak 3 languages, I'm a college graduate, I'm thin and not too hard on the eyes.

 

But guess what? I remember when I was ugly, too shy and didn't have a college degree.

 

You think men wanted to get to know me for my "insides?" Think again, honey.

 

But you know what I did date men who were considered "undesirable." Those who were short, fat, not successful, etc. etc.

 

I was looking for a REAL man.

 

Do you even think I'd have all the options that I did if I were ugly and fat?

 

No, effing way!

 

Thank god I was ok looking right? Thank god I was halfway smart, right?

 

I gave all kinds of men chances. WAY more men than would have given ME a chance if I were fat, ugly and dumb.

 

So save your pity.

 

 

Excellent post Touche!!!

This is SO true and can relate to it all. God knows I have given men chances that other women would not and in my experience the most insecure lying sacks of shet have turned out to be those men that were inferior to what I would normally go for, maybe it was their way of feeling more secure in the relationship and making me feel like I was under their power because otherwise they were consumed with fears of having being snatched away by a better guy.

 

I think I'll stick to my own kind and have some standards, it's better for everyone.

[39388]

You don't get it Kashmir. You obviously never will.

 

It's easier for you, like many others, to blame women and their "impossibly high standards" right? They're so damn superficial. Men aren't though, right?

 

Do you think for one second if I weren't half way attractive I'd even HAVE a choice in men? Are you serious?

Men ARE just as superficial as women, especially the better looking men. I don't see women giving me a chance, but I also know women who very few men will give a chance. I don't recall Kashmir ever saying otherwise.

[lord alfred douglas]

Well this is quite the estrogen party all of a sudden isnt it?

[Trialbyfire]

But it would almost make sense for them to take over a sect like Scientology (in hollywood only) because of the level of financial power and influence. Like it or not a guy like Tom Cruise does have some power with mass audiences, he's lost some cred but any of those big name stars can really manipulate the masses if they want to.

Maybe so for manipulating the masses. The Illuminati are supposedly a secret organization of the most powerful people in the world. The masses don't matter. It's the behind the scenes, real money and power, that the Illuminati are after.

I swear to god he seems like he is 5,4 I met him a few years back when I worked in tv and I remember walking into the room that recording live and I could not see him because he was burreid alive in a sea of teenage girls that towered over him. I was SHOCKED at how tiny this man is. SHOCKED.

That's because the big screen makes everyone appear larger than they are. Also, you're tall yourself, so men who are shorter than you, will appear very short. I'm short, so everyone looks tall to me.

[Trialbyfire]

I don't think that most men are that picky, to believe that larger women are just "fat chicks". The worst male offenders of this type, seem to be the most unattractive. Maybe it's a form of pre-emptive rejection.

[Storyrider]

Also, people on the big screen have gigantic heads.

[confused_2008]

I don't think that most men are that picky, to believe that larger women are just "fat chicks". The worst male offenders of this type, seem to be the most unattractive. Maybe it's a form of pre-emptive rejection.

 

I'm still pretty young, so I'm going to have to disagree with you from my perspective. But, as guys get older and their attractiveness starts to wane, I'm sure you're right.

[confused_2008]

Also, people on the big screen have gigantic heads.

 

Do you mean that figuratively or literally?

[Isolde]

I speak only from what I've heard personally, but it seems that the women that handsome men hurt most badly, are the strikingly attractive women who turn men's heads.

 

It's the competition, I believe.

 

I'm sure there are guys out there that are above that crap, but they are sure rare.

[Trialbyfire]

I'm still pretty young, so I'm going to have to disagree with you from my perspective. But, as guys get older and their attractiveness starts to wane, I'm sure you're right.

There are plenty of couples with similar attractiveness levels, of all ages. This is from butt-ugly right on up to drop-dead gorgeous.

[Isolde]

I think the best looking guys usually end up with women who are pretty but not remarkable looking. The exception would be celebrities. Most of the really beautiful women throughout history, married men that were just above average looking.

[Tomcat33]

Men ARE just as superficial as women, especially the better looking men. I don't see women giving me a chance, but I also know women who very few men will give a chance. I don't recall Kashmir ever saying otherwise.

 

 

The thing is that a lot of you men that complain that women don't give you the time of day would not even THINK of going for women that are are closer to your physical appeal level or a girl who is a bit chubby or seen as not super sexy by others even though you think she is cute. I have read men's posts here about how they secretly like some girl but their friends make fun of that and so they can't go through with it.

 

Men tend to always go for women who rate at least 2 or 3 points higher than them especially below average looking guys and then complain that they can't get anyone. Good looking guys who are popular seem to have more realistic expecations than the average to below average looking guy, and I'll tell you why:

 

Good looking guys don't need to rely on arm candy that is better looking than him to make himself feel like he is good looking, he knows he is good looking. The attractive woman by his side is just the need to want someone who is equally attractive.

 

I had a friend who was overweight and had more baggage than a cargo freight, yet her physical expectations of guys were beyond perfection. When you dug deeper as to why she wanted this, it was because she wanted to be generally perceived as MORE desirable by others in society. Where as if she went for a more average yet still attrative guy that would make her appear for what she was, overweight and not very desirable.