Author Isolde Posted February 18, 2009 Author Share Posted February 18, 2009 I couldn't agree more. Serial dating is BORING, I'd rather be out with my friends, that way I am guaranteed a great time. Yeah, it's one thing to date someone that seems they may be interesting or is just really friendly, but it's another to force yourself to go on embarrassing chemistry-less dates just to feel like you're "working on dating." Link to post Share on other sites
Trimmer Posted February 18, 2009 Share Posted February 18, 2009 However, translating my message to morse code reveals the lyrics to "More Than A Feeling" by Boston... weird. Ahhh, I was trying to figure out why it seemed ... Link to post Share on other sites
citizen67 Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 I've been so discouraged I haven't even tried. Over the years, I had somehow hoped I'd be set up or someone would give me someindication they were interested. It did not happen. Last month I had started to put together some online dating profiles, but had some bad days and stopped. I decided I want to concentrate for the time being on improving myself and making myself more dateable. Exercising and eating better are two things I'm concentrating on now. These are two things I've been poor at for many years. Once I improve myself, I'd be happy to get a 3/10. Maybe that's the wrong attitude? If you are a 3/10 you can definitly get a 5/10 or 6/10 IMO, providing you have stuff to offer in addition to your looks Link to post Share on other sites
clv0116 Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 Yeah, it's one thing to date someone that seems they may be interesting or is just really friendly, but it's another to force yourself to go on embarrassing chemistry-less dates just to feel like you're "working on dating." Well for what it's worth when I submitted a few photos to hot or not on a whim they scored from 7.7 to 8.2, so I'm sure no George Clooney or Brad Pitt, but I'm not Quasimodo either. There are a lot of fairly decent looking guys in the US. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Isolde Posted February 19, 2009 Author Share Posted February 19, 2009 The thing is, clv, I actually PREFER guys that are more around an 8/10 than 9 or 10/10. I'm shallow (and working on it, believe me), but I like to feel comfortable, too. Another thing that makes me choosy is that I have a fairly narrow "type." Not type as in hair color but something more general. Hard to explain lol. Link to post Share on other sites
tigereyes12 Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 But I see attractive people all the time, both male and female. In fact, I would say there is at least something very attractive about most people I come in contact with. However, if you're expecting everyone to be wholly attractive--well, no. There aren't many of those, and there are probably less wholly attractive men than women. It also might be worthwhile to note that, as a heterosexual female, you're more likely to skim over those imperfections that a person sexually attracted to women might notice. Link to post Share on other sites
Surfer Dude Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 I'm shallow too. I only want to have sex with hot women. Link to post Share on other sites
Hughesy Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 I'm shallow too. I only want to have sex with hot women. i don't mind every orifice is a goal to me and where i live hot men vastly outweigh hot women. Link to post Share on other sites
Trimmer Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 i don't mind every orifice is a goal to me and where i live hot men vastly outweigh hot women. It seems to me that vastly outweighing someone would tend to work against one's hotness. But maybe I'm just displaying a "weightist" bias... Link to post Share on other sites
Hughesy Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 LOL. there's more attractive men than women, the women where i live are fat, drunken and just sluts basically. Link to post Share on other sites
clv0116 Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 The thing is, clv, I actually PREFER guys that are more around an 8/10 than 9 or 10/10. I'm shallow (and working on it, believe me), but I like to feel comfortable, too. Another thing that makes me choosy is that I have a fairly narrow "type." Not type as in hair color but something more general. Hard to explain lol. Fair enough and for what it's worth I don't think it's 'wrong' to have specific preferences in a mate any more than it's wrong to have a favorite food. Link to post Share on other sites
Yamaha Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 Most people date at their station of attractiveness. Remember guys in this range are going to be very picky because guys are more visual then women. Link to post Share on other sites
complication Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 Most people date at their station of attractiveness. Remember guys in this range are going to be very picky because guys are more visual then women. Guys judge completely on looks and will put up with you if you're good looking. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted February 19, 2009 Share Posted February 19, 2009 Beware of those Link to post Share on other sites
Author Isolde Posted February 19, 2009 Author Share Posted February 19, 2009 My observation is that very attractive guys tend to date attractive women, but not VERY attractive women. Moderately attractive guys tend to be the ones that date the really beautiful women. It is not true that guys judge COMPLETELY on looks. That is a cynical point of view. I'm not a 10 by a looooooong shot, but I'm far more worried about how my personality comes off, than about being "not perfect enough" (I can't change my physical attributes because I'm thin and put myself together well, so I just sort of strike that off the list of things to worry about). And for the last time, I am not on some mission to get the most handsome guy out there. This thread is just ... musing. Link to post Share on other sites
39388 Posted February 20, 2009 Share Posted February 20, 2009 If you are a 3/10 you can definitly get a 5/10 or 6/10 IMO, providing you have stuff to offer in addition to your looks I'd like to think so. I do have the financial stability and brain, but sometimes I say things out of emotion that I regret. It is a mixed bag. Actually if someone has enough inner beauty, they look better on the outside. I shouldn't even be using these ratings as they are completely subjective. One advantage I might have is many men automatically rate an overweight woman very low, while I think some are extremely beautiful. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted February 20, 2009 Share Posted February 20, 2009 I do have the financial stability and brain, but sometimes I say things out of emotion that I regret. The regret part IMO is what is chewing on you. It eats self-esteem. Just because you're a man doesn't mean you're a robot. Your ability to achieve financial stability tells me you can and do function well in the work-world and have interpersonal skills. The right woman for you will mesh with your emotional style. IMO, you can always learn to express yourself better, but that's life-work, not a prerequisite for a relationship. Acceptance is part of health, whether it be the scale of 1 to 10 being talked about here or that of your emotional style. Think about what you've expressed that you would accept in a woman. Do you not deserve equal acceptance? Of course you do Link to post Share on other sites
39388 Posted February 22, 2009 Share Posted February 22, 2009 The regret part IMO is what is chewing on you. It eats self-esteem. Just because you're a man doesn't mean you're a robot. Your ability to achieve financial stability tells me you can and do function well in the work-world and have interpersonal skills. The right woman for you will mesh with your emotional style. IMO, you can always learn to express yourself better, but that's life-work, not a prerequisite for a relationship. Acceptance is part of health, whether it be the scale of 1 to 10 being talked about here or that of your emotional style. Think about what you've expressed that you would accept in a woman. Do you not deserve equal acceptance? Of course you do I don't regret most of what I say, but a few times on here I have said something so hurtful or crazy I wish I can take it back. I don't know of any woman who likes that. Nobody is perfect and nearly everybody gets angry from time to time, but I need to control it sometimes. In my case, the vast majority of my anger is directly related to my lack of relationship experience and being lonely a lot. At least I know where it comes from. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted February 22, 2009 Share Posted February 22, 2009 Try this (yes I know it's a TJ , but what else is new for me)....express where the anger comes from, rather than the anger itself. MC taught me how to get to the root of the anger and express those base emotions in a clear and more calm fashion. It literally bypasses the anger. My problem prior was I wouldn't express the emotions, primarily hurt, and I would let them build into anger, which was expressed poorly and without structure, hence received badly. It wasn't handsome and it wasn't rare (back to the thread) Link to post Share on other sites
39388 Posted February 22, 2009 Share Posted February 22, 2009 That can be easier said than done. I almsot always know it is building and when there is no one to express it to. Then someone can say the smallest thing and boom, the hateful crazy things come. Then I regret it. It does seem like if I can get some more outlets or friends, some of the orginal cause will go away and when things do start to build, they will be easier to diffuse. I can't blow up at a date like this or it will be all over in a second. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted February 22, 2009 Share Posted February 22, 2009 Post a thread or update a relevant thread on it and we can work it. Identifying and directing base emotions to the proper source (whether it be within or without) is healthy work Link to post Share on other sites
chrislovestosurf Posted February 22, 2009 Share Posted February 22, 2009 South American women are outrageous Cuban and Puerto Rican women not so much and I'm allowed to say that. I'm not Ben Afleck myself, so I don't pretend I am. But South America..besides cocaine and pirrahna fish they seem to produce the most gorgeous women Amen to that brother. But you left out Central American women... Costa Rican women oh my god! Link to post Share on other sites
clv0116 Posted February 22, 2009 Share Posted February 22, 2009 South American women are outrageous Unfortunately the guys I know here who imported one have about a 50% chance of her 'blossoming' into something not so attractive. They don't have the thin gene. On the other hand Asians, particularly filipinas, seem to have massively better chances of staying within a reasonable tonnage. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Isolde Posted February 22, 2009 Author Share Posted February 22, 2009 Unfortunately the guys I know here who imported one have about a 50% chance of her 'blossoming' into something not so attractive. They don't have the thin gene. On the other hand Asians, particularly filipinas, seem to have massively better chances of staying within a reasonable tonnage. Asians yes, but most filipinas I've seen have more average set figures (which isn't necessarily a bad thing, I just don't think they're particularly thin?) Link to post Share on other sites
Author Isolde Posted February 22, 2009 Author Share Posted February 22, 2009 Update: I don't think there's really such a lack of handsome men as I thought. In the past week, I've seen a good number of yummy guys out and about. Of course most are with girls. Yes: I used "yummy" to describe the male sex. Isolde descends to even lower depths. Link to post Share on other sites
Recommended Posts