Lishy Posted February 20, 2009 Share Posted February 20, 2009 Loving the ring!!!!!!!! TBF, I am worried that you are, well no not you, that HE is moving so fast!! In my experience that fast is not good! How long have you been dating? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Trialbyfire Posted February 20, 2009 Author Share Posted February 20, 2009 Thanks Island Girl! He's a darling. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Trialbyfire Posted February 20, 2009 Author Share Posted February 20, 2009 Thanks shadowplay! Lishy, we've been dating since New Year's Eve. I do agree that this is happening at lightning pace. That's why I pushed out the wedding date to next summer, instead of later this year. It will give us almost a year and a half, to get to know each other better. Link to post Share on other sites
wuggle Posted February 20, 2009 Share Posted February 20, 2009 Congratulations (from me and Anne1707). It's nice when things go well for people. All the best. :bunny: Link to post Share on other sites
Author Trialbyfire Posted February 20, 2009 Author Share Posted February 20, 2009 Thanks wuggle and Anne! Link to post Share on other sites
Lishy Posted February 20, 2009 Share Posted February 20, 2009 I am over the moon for you, sorry but my natural sceptical side came out there! You know what you are doing and for that I am overjoyed!!!!!! Congrats !!!!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Trialbyfire Posted February 20, 2009 Author Share Posted February 20, 2009 It's cool Lishy! Thanks for watching my back. Link to post Share on other sites
Star Gazer Posted February 20, 2009 Share Posted February 20, 2009 Oh. My. GAWD! How did I miss this, and why didn't you tell me earlier?!?!?!? SOOOOO happy for you! All that teasing I did about gettin' hitched, well it seemed to somehow have had an impact on the cosmos! It is fast, but when it's right, it's right! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Trialbyfire Posted February 20, 2009 Author Share Posted February 20, 2009 SG, I was thinking and thinking and thinking, like Winnie the Pooh, wondering if I was insane for doing this so quickly. But with the extended engagement period, I'm feeling better. You've called this from beginning to end! My LS guardian angel! I'm waiting for your thread!! Link to post Share on other sites
jerbear Posted February 20, 2009 Share Posted February 20, 2009 wow... it was fast. Well congrats! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Trialbyfire Posted February 20, 2009 Author Share Posted February 20, 2009 Thanks jerbear. Yes, my head is still spinning and no, not in a 360 degree way! Link to post Share on other sites
Star Gazer Posted February 20, 2009 Share Posted February 20, 2009 Okay, now my rational side is kicking in. Not trying to poo poo on your engagement, because I'm sure excited for you, but... You knew him less than 2 months when he proposed. Are you sure you know him well enough to make this sort of commitment? I know you'll have a long engagement, and that's great. But still... I mean, you analyze everything. I would think it would take you 2 months just to analyze whether to accept should he propose. Or have you been analyzing this whole time? Any other details? Are you moving in together? Link to post Share on other sites
Touche Posted February 20, 2009 Share Posted February 20, 2009 Wow! What a great proposal! What a guy, what a guy. He is GOOD! As for him moving too fast? The guy knows what he wants. What is so wrong with that? It's clear that since you accepted you know what you want too. Some may say that's not good. You're moving too fast. Only YOU both know if you're moving too fast or not. If you're really smart and you're really realistic about your compatibility then no...you're not moving too fast. You can really know after just a few weeks or so whether it's right. And anyway, it's not like you're getting married tomorrow. In MY experience that fast CAN be right! In our case we were engaged after 4 weeks of dating and I moved in 2 months after that. Five months after that we were married. Yep, I was a June bride this time! He obviously gave this a lot of thought to have planned it out and executed it the way he did. I have to give him credit for that. I guess all this is to say that the time line matters not. It's how smart you both are about knowing whether you're REALLY on the same page about the important things. And it does sound like you both are. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Trialbyfire Posted February 20, 2009 Author Share Posted February 20, 2009 I've been analyzing him from the day I met him. His words and actions line up perfectly. From what I've come to know, he's the real thing. From what I've heard, he's the real thing. Everything compares and meshes. No lumps or bumps. I can't ignore that it's been a short time. I also can't ignore that I don't know him as well as I want to. I do know there's nothing I can give him that he hasn't got or could get easily. I can only take a mini-leap of faith and see where it takes us. Link to post Share on other sites
Star Gazer Posted February 20, 2009 Share Posted February 20, 2009 I'm waiting for your thread!! Haha! It will be a long time before I talk about a ring! Sheesh. Skiman is buying a new house, and is complaining on a daily basis that 5 bedrooms is far too much space to live in alone. It's as though he's hinting. My lease isn't up until September, and I was thinking even September would be too soon to make a big step like moving in...at 10 months, not 2!! But again, I'm soooo happy for you. And yes - I called it! I TOLD YA SO! (Damn, that feels good to say under these circumstances!!!) Link to post Share on other sites
OpenBook Posted February 20, 2009 Share Posted February 20, 2009 He was always straight up with me and wide open about his thoughts and feelings. No games, no b/s. Um, forgive me for pointing out the obvious... but how do you know that??? You only just MET him less than 2 months ago!! How much do you know about his previous marriage -- why they broke up, etc.? Congratulations (I think???)... and may you both get to know each other VERY WELL in the next year-and-a-half before you tie the knot. The more time you spend together, the better. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Trialbyfire Posted February 20, 2009 Author Share Posted February 20, 2009 Thanks Touche! Time will tell how this plays out. I do know we're both big on family, fidelity and financial responsibility. SG, Hmmm...skiman is hinting. September might be a great month! Oh, as for moving in together, we haven't gotten that far yet. Still trying to absorb this part first. Link to post Share on other sites
Touche Posted February 20, 2009 Share Posted February 20, 2009 Um, forgive me for pointing out the obvious... but how do you know that??? You only just MET him less than 2 months ago!! Same way as I knew probably. Are you telling me that you can't recognize when a guy is not upfront and honest and not playing games with you? Maybe some women are better at this than others. (No offense but weren't you a OW? That's kind of relevant here.) How much do you know about his previous marriage -- why they broke up, etc.? If she doesn't know every last detail I'll eat my hat. I sure knew to make it all my business before he proposed and I accepted. He was very forthcoming though...I didn't have to probe much at all. And how "straight up and wide open" have YOU been with HIM? For example, your rather violent reaction to those who try to psycho-analyze you... even though you have no problem whatsoever dishing it out to them?? Funny, but many may say the same of me. Fact is that I'm not the same with my H as I am on here. For one thing, my H doesn't psychoanlyze me. Never. He accepts me as I am...yep as crazy as I am, he does. And that brings out the BEST in me. Get it? Congratulations (I think???)... and may you both get to know each other VERY WELL in the next year-and-a-half before you tie the knot. I'll bet they know each other very well by now. Just as my H and I did after just a few weeks. Some people will NEVER understand that. Never. The more time you spend together, the better. True. But if TBF is as right about her guy as I was about mine, then more time won't make a bit of difference...well maybe it will in that she'll just be that much more convinced that they're meant for each other. That's how it was (still is) for us anyway. Ok, more questions TBF...how long has he been divorced? Link to post Share on other sites
Author Trialbyfire Posted February 20, 2009 Author Share Posted February 20, 2009 Touche, he's been divorced for a little over a year and separated for over two years. They parted fairly amicably in that while they don't stay in touch, there's no bitterness or hatred. And yes, I do know why they parted ways, from him and third parties. It all jives! Link to post Share on other sites
Touche Posted February 20, 2009 Share Posted February 20, 2009 Touche, he's been divorced for a little over a year and separated for over two years. They parted fairly amicably in that while they don't stay in touch, there's no bitterness or hatred. And yes, I do know why they parted ways, from him and third parties. It all jives! That's good. I mean all the way around this is good, in my opinion, from what I can see. Of course you know the details surrounding his divorce! Sheesh! Anyone who would think that you'd be engaged to a man who you were clueless about in terms of the circumstances of his separation and divorce knows nothing about you. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Trialbyfire Posted February 20, 2009 Author Share Posted February 20, 2009 That's good. I mean all the way around this is good, in my opinion, from what I can see. Of course you know the details surrounding his divorce! Sheesh! Anyone who would think that you'd be engaged to a man who you were clueless about in terms of the circumstances of his separation and divorce knows nothing about you. I have to giggle about this. Touche, imagine me not knowing this information. Can you imagine it? I've sourced this man from end to end, history, everything. That's the way I roll, when entering something serious like a relationship nvm getting engaged. Link to post Share on other sites
OpenBook Posted February 20, 2009 Share Posted February 20, 2009 True. But if TBF is as right about her guy as I was about mine, then more time won't make a bit of difference...well maybe it will in that she'll just be that much more convinced that they're meant for each other. That's how it was (still is) for us anyway. Ok, more questions TBF...how long has he been divorced? OK, well since I'm OBVIOUSLY not qualified:rolleyes:, I'll leave you guys to ask all the questions. And I admire your combined absolute trust in the source of the answers to deliver the unvarnished truth. And hey - if he's happy, and TBF is happy - then I say "Rock" On!! (See what I did there?) Link to post Share on other sites
Touche Posted February 20, 2009 Share Posted February 20, 2009 I have to giggle about this. Touche, imagine me not knowing this information. Can you imagine it? Nope. Of course I can't imagine it. Really. No way. That's why I said that anyone who would think otherwise really doesn't know how you roll (as you say.) I know where you're coming from. Trust me. I know. I've sourced this man from end to end, history, everything. That's the way I roll, when entering something serious like a relationship nvm getting engaged. As you should. I think anyone who does anything less is being naive. Do you know that people many times spend more time researching and getting to know a car they're about to buy than they spend getting to know a man they're thinking of spending the rest of their lives with? You know that's true. I mean just the fact that someone would ask you how much you know about the man you just agreed to marry's previous marriage. Wow. I knew all about after about 2 weeks! Bet you did too. In my world I can't imagine agreeing to marry a man whose past I was clueless about. No eff-ing-way. Never. No way. No how. In that way, we're similar. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Trialbyfire Posted February 20, 2009 Author Share Posted February 20, 2009 Yes, if you look at my snowman thread, you can see how much I already knew about him within a few days. In two weeks, a lot more. Now, much, much more and not just from him or one source. Past experience always helps to reinforce the need to do the research. LS just reinforces it. I believe that about the car v. the fiancé/fiancée. Yes, in that we're similar. Link to post Share on other sites
Touche Posted February 20, 2009 Share Posted February 20, 2009 OK, well since I'm OBVIOUSLY not qualified:rolleyes:, I'll leave you guys to ask all the questions. And I admire your combined absolute trust in the source of the answers to deliver the unvarnished truth. Peception is reality. Remember that. And hey - if he's happy, and TBF is happy - then I say "Rock" On!! (See what I did there?) What? Backtracked? Remember, perception is reality. Link to post Share on other sites
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