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Tight Spot- Need Some Guidance


CowbellCrusader

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CowbellCrusader

I've been seeing this girl for a couple weeks. We've been on a couple dates and we get along well. There have been a few hookups too. We're in college and are in a campus club together.

 

We both recently got out of relationships a few months ago (fall last year). We've moved on and have had a chance to go out and get to know other people.

 

She said recently that she doesn't know yet if she wants to give up being single. She has a number of reasons and I talked these over with her the other night. She doesn't know what she wants and is on the fence, but leaning towards staying single for the time being. I would like to have a relationship eventually with her, but I don't know exactly how to make this happen.

 

 

 

With that in mind, her birthday is coming up this week. The big 21. It's on Thursday. She's planning on going out to celebrate with friends on Wednesday and Thursday for it. There is a dance event for the club we're both in on Friday too.

 

 

What should I do about her birthday?

Should I try to take her out to dinner (I brought this up, she didn't to be really available)? Should I cook instead (she's being Vegan for lent)? Should I buy her drinks all night? Should I get her something (I am thinking giving her some flowers at her first class)? If so, what?

 

 

I do not want to come on too strong and scare her away. I also do not want to look clingy or desperate.

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She's already said no.

Buy her a card, and wish her a happy birthday, then go out and have some fun.

 

Take no as her answer and don't hang around her like some drooling puppy.

Take the hint.

 

She may well surprise you in a week or two - and have a boyfriend on her arm.

 

She wants to be single, and on her terms.

And what she's saying is that single or not - you're unlikely to be in the picture.

 

Sorry.

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CowbellCrusader

That's basically what I was thinking. I wanted to get some unbiased advice, which is hard to get from friends who either try to validate what you may want or push some personal agenda.

 

I realized that there was little hope for anything in the near future, but I didn't want to act like an idiot in the process.

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