I feel as though my life is leading nowhere and I can't change it...

[uRabbit]

I'm young. I just turned 21. And already I'm feeling as though I have yet to set myself on the path to success. I'm working a job that makes me about $1500/mo (after taxes) and my monthly bill to income ratio is about 98:100. I work with developmentally disabled in a 24-hour care facility. There is one staff on shift at a time in a three bedroom apartment in a normal apartment complex. I spend Wed - Saturday there, sleeping on the pull-out sofa bed. The company I work for is very shifty. They have fired employees for debatable reasons. They fired a single mother and she ended up getting full benefits from the government because of the shady reasons that our company gave them for terminating her employment. I am never comfortable working there and never feel a sense of job security. Even though I have been there for two years and in the field for over three years.

 

I do not like my job and I do not like my income. I have thought about doing something similar, such as being a Case Manager or a Psycho-Social Rehabilitation Worker (PSR Worker) and other similar things. However, they do not really appeal to me in any way other than the income. And I'm not organized enough to keep all that paperwork.

 

As far as my bills go... There's no breathing room. With my tax returns, I'm paying off my credit cards (aka credit score killers) and keeping one for security purposes (as it's always been used for), plus having a credit card with no balance looks good on a report. This won't exactly fix my financial situation though. $350/mo also goes to my tuition repayment. I went to Apollo College for Massage Therapy. Unfortunately, it turned out to be the wrong career choice for me. I never even made it into the field. Once I got out of college, I'd worked my ass off for a good four months looking for jobs and attempting to set up interviews, but since I'm a [straight] man, I'm not exactly a desired candidate for any open positions. And I can't just rent a room for $300/mo cause I don't have any clientele. It's extremely hard to break into the field and I guess I let that get the best of me.

 

My lease is almost up in my apartment, and rent will go up more when I move in with my friend.

 

I don't know what to do or where to go from here. If something were to go wrong... My phone breaks. My car needs fixed. I get injured... I would have no way to cover it.

 

I'm sinking into a depression, and that's a place I do not want to go...