11 months NC, my status

[BackonTrack2]

11 months nc, relationship officially ended, about this time last year, the year went slow at first, then started to snow ball.

 

in hindsight, what do I think now? well 11 months, 3 rebounds later, i still don't know, something happen to that female, she started to change on me.

 

i'm in a new relationship, #4 girl since the break, i like her, she's older, mature, wordly, stronger as well, i don't know whats happening with this one, i'll see where the river takes me.

 

i broke nc maybe twice, a phone call with no response, then a drunken text, no response, that was it, after that no nothing, 2 contacts in 11 months is not bad, the ex left, never looked back, i guess i wasn't that important..

 

i guess i'm not over it if i'm posting about it, but i don't really feel nothing, a part of me still feels guilty i suppose, why i am not sure, i think its because i know within mysel i could of done more, and i was going to, but i found out she was cheating, at the same time, she was 80% gone so it's whatever.

 

i was with the new girl about two nights ago, i just started to tear because i realized that my ex, left me cold and dry, i was so lost, it took me months to recover, wow she really didn't give a fawk, still surpirses me, wow is the only word that comes to mind.

 

as time passes, i am just growing to hate her, not hate, thats a strong word, but look at her as a whore, a liar, a pretender, she sort of disgusts me, its more like a bad taste in my mouth, sort of like "you were with her" ewwww...

 

i'll end like this:

i had the ex blocked for a few months on fb, within 24 hours of me unblocking her, she changed her status to "in a relationship", it took me back a few, i wonder why she waited all those months to change her status, that was strange, thats pretty much the last sign of life i saw/hearx about her during these past 11 months.

 

 

but back to the future, things are looking good, i was down for a yeaar but i'm back, the new girl is cracking jokes putting on lotion on her skin, sitting next to me, wearing these nice matching panties and bra's, so cute, she's trying hard.

 

i think i moved on, i don't think you can move on until you get that other person out your heart. i don't see our future anymore, i see a new life, a different path, it doesn't even burn anymore.

 

thats how life works, you never know whats going to happen.

[paperchase]

Wow, your account really moved me. First, 11 months of virtual NC is very impressive. But what really touched me is that it's clear you are still not fully healed. That worries me because the thought of carrying my current pain for that long is scary.

 

I can totally understand where you are coming from when you express your disbelief in your ex's ability to move on and not look back. It really trivialized the love you thought you had when someone slams the door shut with no hesitation or regret. That is something many of us fear.

 

I don't know your situation, but our ex's move on easier than we do for a variety of reasons. The first is that they want to move on. They made the decision to call it quits and they had been mentally preparing for that decision for longer than they'll ever admit. Also, often they have already found our replacement. That replacement is usually not a rebound relationship. We are rebounding, but they left us for what they thought were greener pastures. Sometimes those new relationships fizzle quickly, but given 11 months of NC and no looking back, chances are your ex is pretty happy. I don't say that to hurt you either.

 

The fact is that every person is different and we all have different ways to cope. I'm the sentimental type who likes to maintain contact with all of my ex's except the ones whose heart I broke so bad they went NC forever. But I don't think I've ever maintained contact with a girl who dumped me. Ok, well one, but I was 15 and we are good friends in our 30s now. I can't even remember why we broke up. LOL! But my current ex pulled away from me slowly but deliberately until she found my replacement and then there was no looking back. She got very cold and distant. I went from the most important thing in her life to a very low priority who should couldn't squeeze in time to talk to. I was blindsided.

 

The way she has coped is to put a brick wall around her heart. She has tried to forget me and locked all our memories away. She doens't want to look me in the eye or hear any arguments about what we had. She wants to move on and has told me to do the same. So that's what I'm trying to do. Prior to getting dumped, I was beating myself up real bad trying to fix things and figure out what I could have done differently. In the end, it wasn't me. She made her decision for her own reasons. People stay in abusive relationships with cheaters and all kinds of bad types so when the heart says yes, there is little that will keep lovers apart. Likewise, when the heart says no, there is little we can do to salvage a relationship.

 

Just be strong and tell yourself that the right person for you is out there. You have to believe that.

[BackonTrack2]

As far as HER coping, FAWK her(whore), she sucks cocks, and gets fawked, thats her coping.

 

As far as her moving on, that whore took months to move on, and hell, she didn't even leave, i pushed her away

 

Thank God.

 

 

In the end, its not about them, its about You.

.

 

 

in reality, i don't know her motivation, nor do i care, i don't know her reason(s) or coping strategies nor do I care, I know she's a whore, Happy or not she still remembers ;-) so whatever, and in the end, fawk her, she can die, in addition, this relationship was a good learning experience for the future, its already coming in handy and i can tell when a girl is just not into me, no more wondering "whats wrong with her", "she's acting strange" yada yada yada, as soon as the next one distance themselves, i am ending it with no remorse, as soon as the next one tries to deny me pussy, i am ending it with no remorse, i won't even question the decision, as soon as i start to feel strange feelings i cannot understand and have thoughts randomly come out in the blue, i am ending it.

 

i can carleses about that particular whore, i am sure she will not be the last and i am sure i will encounter many more, more savvy than her, but i believe i got the basis, whore crietoria down packed... I honestly want to thank her, I really do, at the same time, I just want to just piss on her, thats about it... Thanks for your reply sir.

 

as far as your situation goes, why are you even talking to your EX? fawk her, she's also probably getting fawked and sucking cock as well....

 

now i'm going to sit down, smoke this nice cuban cigar #4 got me, and then look in the fridge and heat up, this rabbit meat thingy she brought and dip it in hot sauce, then take a shower, put on my clothes and go see her in the city, fall asleep next to her, spend 5 minutes realizing just how fawked up the ex did me, then wake up to a new day and sometime in the future, when i least expect it, i'm going to bumb into her and when that day comes, i'll just probably ignore her or spit in her face out of spite, who knows, depending how i feel, i guess what i'm trying to say is fawk them and their reason(s), all u need to know is

 

they don't want you, the end

 

and in regards to #4, I kept it so simple, all i told her I wanted was pussy and food and she said NO PROBLEM.

So this one is going to last longer than the previous one, if there is one thing my ex thought me, is every man for them selves.

 

damn whore corrupted me.

[BackonTrack2]

damnit, i'm still mad...

that stupid cunt left me...

 

man why couldn't she have left before i fell in love with her, whore

i'm still mad, one year and 4 rebounds later, to top it off, the new girl is acting cocky, bastard, you give them a little they try and take a yard

 

i should of payed more attention to that damn whore, took her for granted but she stayed anyway, and then fooled and tricked me for months, all the while using me, whore, why am i even blaming her??

 

man she abanded me the time i needed her most, i can't believe it, i still can't believe it sometimes but what can you do, thats life.

 

i have a long way to go in life, she left right when i was starting off, right when i could of used her the MOST, what happen to her, something happen to her, non loyal cunt