hotboxxin Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 My girlfriend left to go home the other night and she left her facebook on open to her messages, and I see a message from some dude and it says "Merry Christmas Beautiful!!!." So I instantly get suspicious and read other messages and here is just a few of what i read: Her: you have to come into pen, use goin to apex to snowboard as an excuse and then use coming to earls for dinner as an excuse to come see me haha.. text me to make sure im workin though, id be pissed if i wasnt workin and you come in. Her: Yeah i been textin you but no reply Her: I miss the texts.. be sure to let me know when you get your phone back on track Her: I'll be working lots during the summer.. and you'll definately have to come see me then Him:if you get a sore throat again let me no and i'll drive down and make you feel better with a pack of halls! ???? Him: i stopped by earls today to give you a hug but you werent there so i passed on the message to one of the servers Her: haha ohh that sucks!! work on friday night if your gonna be in town? i need a hug right now too! Normally i]I dont snoop, but after reading that who can blame me...... So i then look at her texts in her phone when she goes to the bathroom the next day and she has been texting the dude saying "hey whats up?" when we are going out for dinner and a hockey that night. She is with me and texting other guys... Is it me or is this unnacceptable? I may have been wrong snooping but to me I feel there is something up. Should I confront her about this and not bring up the fact I snooped? Or should I just bring up his name and ask what is going on even though I will never get a straight answer? Was it wrong for me to even look? I'm most likely to confront her about it, but I know I'm going to get a just friends thing. Do we have to make a rule in our relationship to not text other members of the opposite sex? I do have friends, but I don't text them unless we are getting together to go out or I need something and they do the same. To me it seems very odd to be having these kinds of converstations.... Maybe I'm just pikcing out the bad in them? I don't know. Any insight please? Link to post Share on other sites
in_absentia Posted February 26, 2009 Share Posted February 26, 2009 Does she keep this guy secret from you, did you already know they were friends, and some stuff about him? If she's keeping him a secret then maybe it's something to watch out for. But don't jump to conclusions. Some of those messages are a little bit flirty, but doesn't mean she's cheating on you. Friends give friends hugs and stuff. But she shouldn't be hiding it from you. I know I have guy mates and sometimes I'll text them that I miss talking to them if it's been a while, and it means absolutely nothing romantic. I know I'd feel weird if my bf was talking to some girl like that though, it's natural. But just don't jump the gun! Keep me posted good luck Link to post Share on other sites
Author hotboxxin Posted February 27, 2009 Author Share Posted February 27, 2009 As of now im just trying to stay patient and I will see if he is brought up when we talk about friends etc. I've never even heard of the guy ever and I live in a small town, probably because he is 7 years older then she is. I never get mad at her cause I know how it will end, been doing that with my mom for 21 years haha. But if she doesn't bring him up do I have cause for concern? If I bring him up she is just going to say that they are friends. I don't wanna seem like an insecure jealous a$$ and intrude on her. Is it fair for me to say that I want to know whos shes talking to?? It just seems like an invasion of privacy. But I guess she is keeping it a secret, so do I tell her that she shouldn't keep friends of the opposite sex secret?? Link to post Share on other sites
Bryanp Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 If the roles were reversed do you honestly think she would accept such disrespectful behavior from you? You judge a person by their actions and not by their words. Wow she asking to go to dinner with him and go to a hockey game with him behind your back. Meanwhile she says she misses his hugs? I hate to break it to you but she is acting as if she does not have a boyfriend at all. The fact that she is keeping this all very secret from you also says a great deal. Why would you wish to be in a relationship with a girl who does these things behind your back. I am sure she would not stand for it from you so why are you so accepting of such behavior from her? Link to post Share on other sites
cls_2002 Posted February 27, 2009 Share Posted February 27, 2009 After reading all that it sounds just like a previous relationship I had years ago. Only my boyfriend always told me he was just friends with his ex and I believed him b/c I was just friends with one of my exs. Anyways, turns out every time he seen her he was screwing her. Then there I was on the sideline waiting for him. I say find someone better who will love you for who you are. I found out about him cheating b/c he left his email open and I saw one she sent him talking about how good last weekend was and so on. You need to let her go. Link to post Share on other sites
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