SleeplessInSeattle Posted February 28, 2009 Share Posted February 28, 2009 As the title says I am interested in a woman that I work with. I'm a 26yr old guy that hasn't been with anyone in almost 5 years which isn't helping my confidence out at all. Another issue that I am worried about is coming on too strong or offending her and potentially causing an issue at my place of work (I like my job). A little bit about the situation, I really have a hard time trying to understand her signals. However I can talk to her fairly well without too much of that silent wierdness. We both are big into the night life / club scene (though I can't dance to save my life but thats another story), were both big into Electronica, techno, and trance music and like alot of the same DJ's which is what we usually end up talking about. We both are also into traveling though I think both of us have kind of put the brakes on travel and putting more money in the bank due to the crappy economy. Now as far as the place of work, she is an engineer, and I'm an I.T. geek. So as we don't actually work side by side I do tend to see her often as she has issues alot with her PC. Now about the mixed signals. I am usually pretty good at judging people for what they are and what they want but have a real hard time with her. Like she seems to not have a problem speaking with me while standing within a foot of me keeping eye contact and always smiling, and calling every now and then just to B.S. Then there are the other times where like she told me about a hot DJ that was in town and asked me if I wanted to go with her and a group of her friends. Of course I said sure as I was planning on going anyways and said I'd be at the club around 10pm or so. When I arrived she was already there standing in line to get into the club. The thing is she was there with a date and not a group of friends (how wierd is that?). Now for the greater part of the evening I pretty much ignored them / tried not to linger around them as it was already weird and didn't want to make it worse. However at the end of the night when last call was announced she came and found me to say goodbye / goodnight. I could tell she was a tad tipsy but she gave me the big smile with the long gaze into my eyes and just kind of lingered in the moment (yet another weird thing as here date was standing right there). So what do you guys think is she confused to what she wants? Am I missing something? I really like this girl but I want to be very discreet as this is a co-worker and I don't want to cross any lines (although I'm not sure where that is exactly). Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted February 28, 2009 Share Posted February 28, 2009 OK, it's real simple... First, imagine you and this person becoming a hot item. Imagine marrying her. Will that work within the confines of your professional relationship and, if not, can/would either of you make a professional change to accommodate a relationship? Second, if yes to #1, ask her out. Don't bother trying to figure out her signals. She could be genuinely interested in you; she could just need some cheap validation; she could have her eye on another guy and is using you to make him jealous or move his interest forward. You'll never know until you ask her out. More than once. Link to post Share on other sites
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