Im losing the love of my life. She wants to move out but stay together??

[WhoDey]

I have been living with my gf/ fiancee for 6 months. I am deeply in love with her. We dated 2 years ago and we broke up after about 3 months. I always thought about her and one day ran into her at the store. Well we have since then got back together, got engaged, and moved in together. Lately has been bad and not really for any particular reason. She is just always in a bad mood and always mad and grumpy. Its not just to me its to everyone. She has broken off the wedding but not the engagement and now is moving out. I have fought this for so long and she has stayed this long simply because she didnt want to hurt me anymore. I have been very upset about it. She just doesnt seem to love me like she did. She doesnt seem happy im even around. She will be moving out this weekend. What I need to know is how to handle this. How do I act towards here. She says she still loves me and wants to be engaged but I just dont feel it from her anymore. I think maybe she again is only trying to spare my feelings. I will be more than happy to give anymore information that is needed. Please, any help will do. I just dont know how to act after shes gone. I dont know how to handle this siuation. I love her so much. Shes the one. How do I keep from losing her alltogether?? Thanks so much. MATT

[Fiaman]

THE ONLY THING YOU CAN DO IS GO INTO NO CONTACT

 

If you don't go into NC, it will only get worse. She's losing interest in you dude, how do you let her gain interest? By being a man and walking away. Give it a month without talking to her and that means NO TALKING even if she contacts you. Your relationship is still salvagable. Go into NC before it's too late.

 

Im serious

[seductress989]

Hello,

I haven't posted in a long time, but I would like to explain your exes actions from a female's point of view. I was in the exact situation with my last ex. We were similiar to you two in the fact that we broke up shortly after we started dating and then became engaged. After we were engaged, things started going downhill.......

 

We moved in together soon after becoming engaged and I began to lose feelings for him then. I chose not to end the relationship like an idiot. I did not want to hurt him but I knew that I should have been moving on. Instead I gave him the ring back and moved out....

 

We tried staying together after I moved out but it DID NOT work and it WILL NEVER work. I know why your ex moved out. She wants to break up and is halfway there but can't bring herself to do it. (maybe by moving out she thought you may break up with her which is what she really wants)

 

I know because I was in the same situation with my ex. I did not want to hurt him and I even told him that it wasn't going to work after I moved out. He didn't listen and convinced me to reconsider/keep trying and stupid me didn't want to hurt him.

 

Now I am going through the inevitable NC/moving on process that should have started last in June 2007. I do not want you to go through more pain by drawing out the inevitable......................Please read between the lines and move on because sooner or later you will break up ..TRUST ME

[socialight]

seductress is 100% correct. Go for a party weekend and tell her to have her crap out of your house by the time you get back. And then don't contact her at all.

[gavinus]

Its true, let her go, tell her you love her so you are letting her go, holding on to her will only push her away further and faster, I know this from painful experience, let her go

[confusedcookie]

I would like to give you another perspective of how it may be, because i'm in a similar situation.

 

we're not engaged, but dated for over a year, and was going great, until i went back to his home in china, and he treated me horribly, and i felt that he didn't love me anymore from his actions despite his words saying he did... obviously, we had little fights, and then one big fight at the end. he apologized for his actions, and i accepted, but never really forgave him (my fault, i know).

 

I moved out, and i've been acting grumpy, and mad at him, blowing up and getting mad at the slightest things he does, because i've been having second thoughts about his commitment to me. basically, i think she is picking a fight with you for a reason, and the only way you're going to know is if you have a talk with her. living together and then moving out is never a good thing, in fact, it will only get worse.

 

if you love her, don't go into NC yet, try one last time to win her back or to speak with her. If that doesn't work, then NC, but as a girl, i think sometimes we use "break up" or "moving out" to make a statement, its an indication that something is wrong, but we use it to see if you guys care enough to phone us or to chase after us to ask what is wrong.

[Scree]

I can only suggest you this:

 

Talk to her about it, discuss it. If you're not ready for that or you don't want to there's also a possibility of waiting it out. Maybe it will all become clear once she moves out of the house. I hate to break it to you, but she might want to avoid the sorrow regarding the break-up while she's moving.

 

I can't say I have a lot of experience in this, I'm just thinking more rationaly since I'm a third party.

 

P.S: If you're not sure, go No Contact. It clears a lot of things in a matter of weeks.