misguided Posted March 4, 2009 Share Posted March 4, 2009 help! I met this guy 4 years ago while away for work. We seemed to really enjoy each others company and of course one thing led to another and we had sex. It was the first affair for both of us and we discussed it throughly before we agreed to be with each other. We continued to keep in contact via email and minimal phone calls. We also saw each other 2 other times that same year. We live in different states and he is in the military so he is always traveling. Although we always say we'll see each other again, it's been 3 years later and have not seen each other. We would communicate via text, im and email. About 90% of our communications are all sexual. We've had a handful of phone conversations over the 4 years, but it was pretty much to reaffirm our affection towards another. There are times where we communicate several times a month and then months when we do not communicate at all. I'm not really sure what's going on here. I tried to pull myself away from it and just stop, but I can't. Apparently, he is not wanting this to end either, if the communication is being initiated on both ends. It's been 4 years and I still long for him like I did then and I think that he may feel the same way. Why does this continue on, especially for this long? It's not like we are even having physical contact. I don't even think it's an emotional affair, since we hardly communicate. But what is it that makes each of us continue this? I know this is cheating no matter how you slice it, but to a male.. is it the safer way to cheat?? This is crazy and ridiculous, I know. I'm a very logical person and I just can't understand it. I know this is wrong and I've tried just to stop. I've tried going to counseling to understand why I'm doing this, but something keeps bringing me back to this situation. I'm just trying to understand this, any of this, and make some sense of it so I can move forward. Any feedback would be appreciated. Thanks! Link to post Share on other sites
jwi71 Posted March 4, 2009 Share Posted March 4, 2009 Are YOU married? --If so, characterize your M and your H. --Kids? Is HE married? Do you typically pursue unavailable men? Too many pieces of the puzzle missing...post more details... Link to post Share on other sites
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