Author Island Girl Posted March 10, 2009 Author Share Posted March 10, 2009 Thank you for the info. I don't know how much longer he will be there (HOPEFULLY NOT LONG) but if it is much longer I will have to bite the bullet and ship to him. He is in no way "tech" competent. And shipping is freackin' expensive. I just sent his packet for immigration (4 pounds of paperwork BTW) by DHL and it was $147.00. It will take 5 or more days to get there. No easy way to do ANYTHING when it comes to him, his country, immigration, getting or giving information, etc. His phone isn't working well lately so we have periods of him cutting in and out - and he can't hear me other times - and the phone keeps disconnecting in the middle of the conversations GAWD. Just unbelievable. I mean all of this is nothing new I am just so OVER IT. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Island Girl Posted March 10, 2009 Author Share Posted March 10, 2009 Oh, I see. I was thinking of a friend who's engaged to an Irishman and waiting for something to do with his visa to go through before he can come back to wed. They talk daily via the computer - but with two computers. That sounds like a sucky situation, IG. His cousin does have a computer with internet. He lives on the other side of the island - 30 minutes away by car but he doesn't have a car anymore so he has to take a bus. The bus only runs twice a day. When I was there previously I saw some people waiting by the side of the road. When I asked what they were doing I was told they were waiting for the bus. We went to get something to eat and came back almost 2 hours later - they were still there. I asked when the bus was supposed to come and he said 10:30. -- But it was noon. And he said, "sometimes the bus is late. You just have to wait." And when I was there to get married we were driving and there was a bus in front of us. (We had a rental car.) As the bus turned right a man came out of the door - he was holding on and flew out perpendicular to the bus. I flipped out and thought he was going to fall out and we'd hit him but my husband explained that the bus is so crowded that is normal. And because he is so big, that is usually his position on the bus. Ugh yeah. OMG. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Island Girl Posted March 10, 2009 Author Share Posted March 10, 2009 It sounds like I am making this stuff up. Seriously. I sound deranged don't I? Like some kind of attention whore (to put it bluntly). But it is true. All of it is true. It makes it that much harder to deal with because some people think I am making more of it than it is. But actually dealing with it for 7 years is more than I state here. Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 No way Island Girl! Who in the world would accuse you of making this stuff up? Are they insane? Link to post Share on other sites
Rollercoasterr Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 I dont know how anyone could accuse you of making this stuff up. You've been here way too long and you've helped so many people with their problems, sweetness. Keep your chin up. I know it's hard now, and getting harder, but really...isn't he worth it in the end? I think we all know the answer to this one. Link to post Share on other sites
sb129 Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 We went to get something to eat and came back almost 2 hours later - they were still there. I asked when the bus was supposed to come and he said 10:30. -- But it was noon. And he said, "sometimes the bus is late. You just have to wait." . That old "Pacific Time". I remember it well.... and I remember the buses- you are literally taking your life into your hands if you catch one of those things! Chin up IG- you can almost see the light at the end of the tunnel now, isn't that exciting!!! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Island Girl Posted March 10, 2009 Author Share Posted March 10, 2009 In reading (and knowing) how it is, I'd accuse myself! It just sounds so impossible! But it IS true. Just a backwards-a$$ country. It is BEAUTIFUL. But poor, technologically challenged, etc. They aren't a huge tourist destination. When there are solutions forothers there is always some frickin' backwards reason why it doesn't apply to his country! Just like calling cards! I know of another girl in New Zealand who is dealing with the same issues as far as calling cards not working, etc. They haven't worked since APRIL of last year. Almost a year ago!! Ever since the phone company was taken over. If this was any place else - the pressure would be on to fix it but because his country is so friggin' tiny and there is ONE person in charge of basically everything (and he doesn't give a crap) - it doesn't get addressed. If I beat my head against a wall - it'd be more productive. At least I'd get results a lot faster. Sheesh. There were riots in 2006 just after I left there that cost the country an estimated $112 million in damages. Since then they have received aid from the US, Australia, and New Zealand - however the rubble was carted off and those buildings that were destroyed have just been paved over - turned into parking lots. So where is the money? A lot of the country lives in extreme conditions of poverty with no running water. Yet the Royal Family has a 6,000+sq ft mansion in S.F. Link to post Share on other sites
sb129 Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 I am surprised that calling cards don't work from NZ- there are more people from your Hs country living in NZ than there are living there! Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 I had heard of political unrest in your H's country. It's not surprising considering the type of government it has, an absolute monarchy. Sooner or later when there's such a drastic division between the "haves" and "have nots", it's not surprising that people are going to revolt and resent. Starvation shouldn't be all there is for people to look forward to. Having said that, it's a dramatically beautiful country but with all its issues, something your husband and you, won't have to worry about for much longer. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Island Girl Posted March 10, 2009 Author Share Posted March 10, 2009 I had heard of political unrest in your H's country. It's not surprising considering the type of government it has, an absolute monarchy. Sooner or later when there's such a drastic division between the "haves" and "have nots", it's not surprising that people are going to revolt and resent. Starvation shouldn't be all there is for people to look forward to. Having said that, it's a dramatically beautiful country but with all its issues, something your husband and you, won't have to worry about for much longer. Yes it makes the option of living there completely intolerable. I hope this is what the embassy thinks when they are looking at his application. Let's hope it is open and shut...VISA APPROVED. And yes it is beautiful. Gorgeous. We are very lucky we own four parcels of land (one has a house already) so that when we are set to retire - we already know where we will be. And by that time let's hope there has been some reform. They keep talking about it but nothing has been done yet. Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 Yes it makes the option of living there completely intolerable. I hope this is what the embassy thinks when they are looking at his application. Let's hope it is open and shut...VISA APPROVED. And yes it is beautiful. Gorgeous. We are very lucky we own four parcels of land (one has a house already) so that when we are set to retire - we already know where we will be. And by that time let's hope there has been some reform. They keep talking about it but nothing has been done yet. As a consideration, why not sell the land now? This way, you won't have to constantly be worried about the situation when he's not there to protect it. If you end up retiring there, you can always buy something then, although living in America where it's much safer, might change your minds later on in life, particularly with the better quality of medical care. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Island Girl Posted March 10, 2009 Author Share Posted March 10, 2009 If you end up retiring there, you can always buy something then, although living in America where it's much safer, might change your minds later on in life, particularly with the better quality of medical care. Land is handed down over generations to the first born son. There is no selling it at this point. That would burn all bridges with his family including all of the relatives here. They just deal with things like that differently than we do. And with my mother being the way she is I just can't burn family bridges. We want to have children and I'd like them to have extended family of some sort other than just my brother. Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 Land is handed down over generations to the first born son. There is no selling it at this point. That would burn all bridges with his family including all of the relatives here. They just deal with things like that differently than we do. And with my mother being the way she is I just can't burn family bridges. We want to have children and I'd like them to have extended family of some sort other than just my brother. Wow, so it's still feudalistic! Link to post Share on other sites
Author Island Girl Posted March 10, 2009 Author Share Posted March 10, 2009 Wow, so it's still feudalistic! Yeah -- Nobles and all. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Island Girl Posted March 10, 2009 Author Share Posted March 10, 2009 I downloaded Yahoo Messenger and put credit on there. When I use it -- the microphone says it is set up but when I call to my husband - no one can hear me. I tried this three times. I also tried to get Pingo but my credit card would not charge. So it wouldn't let me register. And PayPal sign up is disabled (even though I have $80.00 sitting there). Skype also takes PayPal but that one says it won't go through because of my settings (and I can't figure out what settings to change or how to change them). It could still be that I reached my spending limit of $30.00 for the month. Who knows. I am worn out with all of this bullshyte (that's Geisha talk). I just can't dodge and weave anymore. Seriously folks. DAMN. Link to post Share on other sites
Geishawhelk Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 It sounds like I am making this stuff up. Seriously. I sound deranged don't I? Like some kind of attention whore (to put it bluntly). But it is true. All of it is true. It makes it that much harder to deal with because some people think I am making more of it than it is. But actually dealing with it for 7 years is more than I state here. I was just thinking....Make some stuff up, and we'll see if we can catch you out..... Go on, spin a yarn....amongst all the true bits..... It might help pass the time...... Link to post Share on other sites
Nicodaemos Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 Nah, you go ahead and spew about anything and everything. I wont cry foul on that, and nobody else here will. Many here seem to have been following you and hoping for you a while now. If anyone has a right to vent, its you. It does help too, just continuing to type till you run out of coherent thought to type about. So, go ahead and muse away, if anything else, it occupies your time for a little while. Maybe, with conditions so bad, you and you husband could do something about it. It seems ridiculous, maybe, but if you can get the peoples support, maybe living and working in here would provide enough extra you could send some back there, and find a way to imrpove things. Not just for your family there, but mayhaps spread the good will. If you can get the people behind you, or if there is a good person there that actually cares to get things cleaned up, maybe support that person. Just ideas for the future. Its a long shot, doing that, would take many years for things to truly change maybe, but, upon retirement for you two, it might have progressed to you and him could depend on clean running water and steady power. Things most here take for granted, but that most there, would be singing praises about. (and it can maybe take you mind off the current frustrations) Link to post Share on other sites
rod_in_gtown Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 Hang in there IG, the road has been long and arduous, I myself had a 10-year immigration process that ended finally this morning at 11:00 AM with my oath ceremony. I am now a naturalized citizen but it all started in January of 2000. By many standards my process hasn't been as hard as yours has but it has been filled with challenges, heartache, and a lot of funds spent to get it done. Hang in there. There is light at the end of the tunnel. And when it comes, it'll be so sweet that you will realize that all of this that you went through for him, will have been a small price to pay for the difference it will make for the rest of your life. R Link to post Share on other sites
Trialbyfire Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 I downloaded Yahoo Messenger and put credit on there. When I use it -- the microphone says it is set up but when I call to my husband - no one can hear me. I tried this three times.Did you try it with someone else's phone, like one of his family members? Also, try it with someone closer, if you know someone who's in another country. This way, you can test if it's something to do with your microphone setting(s). I also tried to get Pingo but my credit card would not charge. So it wouldn't let me register. And PayPal sign up is disabled (even though I have $80.00 sitting there). Skype also takes PayPal but that one says it won't go through because of my settings (and I can't figure out what settings to change or how to change them). It could still be that I reached my spending limit of $30.00 for the month. Who knows. I am worn out with all of this bullshyte (that's Geisha talk). I just can't dodge and weave anymore. Seriously folks. DAMN. Oh geez Island Girl. Crazy stuff. I wish I could help you but only if I were with you physically, for some of the technical issues. Is your paypal account unverified? If so, all you need to do is to add a bank account to get it verified. Paypal didn't used to be that way, in that you could fuel from your credit card alone, with an offsetting verification phone call to a working phone number. Link to post Share on other sites
Star Gazer Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 IG... can you PM me and tell me what island this is? I'm dying to know. I feel kinda stupid not knowing what island in the SP has political unrest. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Island Girl Posted March 10, 2009 Author Share Posted March 10, 2009 Hang in there IG, the road has been long and arduous, I myself had a 10-year immigration process that ended finally this morning at 11:00 AM with my oath ceremony. I am now a naturalized citizen but it all started in January of 2000. By many standards my process hasn't been as hard as yours has but it has been filled with challenges, heartache, and a lot of funds spent to get it done. CONGRATULATIONS!! It helps tremendously to hear the good stories. Hang in there. There is light at the end of the tunnel. And when it comes, it'll be so sweet that you will realize that all of this that you went through for him, will have been a small price to pay for the difference it will make for the rest of your life. R I hold tight to that everyday. Lately it seems it has been wearing on him more. Now that the interview is finally here I suppose he feels the pressure. And I know he doesn't like the fact that he has to do it all by himself. The original plan was that I would meet him in Fiji to do all of this and I think he really wanted me by his side. That can't happen now. So he is freaked out. Link to post Share on other sites
clv0116 Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 .... I have no choice but to call direct and that is $1.71+ a minute!! If you get a VOIP phone from packet8 your rate would be $0.31/minute for direct dial to your beloved. http://www.packet8.net/international_services/ Link to post Share on other sites
Author Island Girl Posted March 10, 2009 Author Share Posted March 10, 2009 If you get a VOIP phone from packet8 your rate would be $0.31/minute for direct dial to your beloved. http://www.packet8.net/international_services/ Does he need an internet connection? -- or just the packet8 phone sent? Link to post Share on other sites
clv0116 Posted March 10, 2009 Share Posted March 10, 2009 Does he need an internet connection? -- or just the packet8 phone sent? In this use case, he just picks up his existing phone, you replace or supplement your existing phone with the packet8 device on your end. Link to post Share on other sites
Author Island Girl Posted March 10, 2009 Author Share Posted March 10, 2009 Did you try it with someone else's phone, like one of his family members? Also, try it with someone closer, if you know someone who's in another country. This way, you can test if it's something to do with your microphone setting(s). I tried another number in Tonga with the same problem. And I don't know anyone else in any other countries. Oh geez Island Girl. Crazy stuff. I wish I could help you but only if I were with you physically, for some of the technical issues. I appreciate that TBF. {{hugs}} I know you have been trying to help so much. That in itself means a lot. Is your paypal account unverified? If so, all you need to do is to add a bank account to get it verified. Paypal didn't used to be that way, in that you could fuel from your credit card alone, with an offsetting verification phone call to a working phone number. No - it has been verified. But I went on and did a PayPal transfer to my bank account. I'll just get the money back. We're just going to have to muddle through. We've done that a lot over the years when different crap has presented itself. Link to post Share on other sites
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