Dexter Morgan Posted March 12, 2009 Share Posted March 12, 2009 I get so tired of everyone bashing the so-called "bad boy" and "pretty women". Most bad boys do eventually settle down because they want the same thing most men want. When they do settle down it is usually with one of the pretty girls they have been dating. They may not be a so called "bad boy" anymore but a great husband and father. On the other hand they could end up treating their wife like crap. But,that is the chance that girl is willing to take because of whatever reason. I imagine that even though he treats her bad she was still in love with him and if she had married anyone else she still would have felt she had settled. And then it comes back around full swing to the original question of this thread once they realize they have a jerk based on the "bad boy" qualities that attracted them....."where are all the good guys":confused: Link to post Share on other sites
Woggle Posted March 12, 2009 Share Posted March 12, 2009 This is why I roll my eyes when women complain about there being no good men. There are very few true female victims in the relationship world because for some reason they seek out the worst that the female gender has to offer. Link to post Share on other sites
Yamaha Posted March 12, 2009 Share Posted March 12, 2009 These bad boys are usually confident and go after what they want in a women. THey don't mind telling a women they want her body before they want her love and don't apologize for their desires. Many women are drawn to this because they feel is is very manly behavior. Many good guys are not so upfront with their desires and they become the guy she likes to talk to or hang out with but not the one she wants in a relationship. They value the manly agressive behavior above the kind, thoughtful, sensitive one. This is why men can't seem to understand women when they say they want a good guy but never want him in a relationship. These bad boys show a women he wants them as a women and this is what good guys fail to do. If the bad boy is nice one in a while she will just swoon with desire because he is appealing to her motherly instincts as well as her sexual ones. Not saying you need to change who you are but you just need to understand what causes attraction in a women and being nice and caring does not cause that sexual spark so many women need for attraction. Be bold and you will see a difference in the way women look at you. Link to post Share on other sites
clv0116 Posted March 12, 2009 Share Posted March 12, 2009 The good guys are the ones you call creepy for glancing at your ass. The ones you won't talk to. Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted March 13, 2009 Share Posted March 13, 2009 And then it comes back around full swing to the original question of this thread once they realize they have a jerk based on the "bad boy" qualities that attracted them....."where are all the good guys":confused: So basically you are calling the women who like these "bad boys" - "bad girls". So therefore don't seek out these women. I hear more "where are all the "good guys" from regular girls not the really pretty women who normally are the ones who go for the bad boys. These type of guys are more of a challenge for them. Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted March 13, 2009 Share Posted March 13, 2009 im a girl and ill say it like it is. girls are dumb @sses that want @ss holes. nice guys end up alone, as do nice girls. cest la vie. it sucks. thats why im turning my life around and making a career change into the exciting field of golf ball diving. Why don't nice guys and nice girls date each other and not worry about the dumb @sses and @ss holes of the world? Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted March 13, 2009 Share Posted March 13, 2009 Amygdala and Adrenal. The human condition. Link to post Share on other sites
Dexter Morgan Posted March 13, 2009 Share Posted March 13, 2009 So basically you are calling the women who like these "bad boys" - "bad girls". So therefore don't seek out these women. I don't:) I also know that if I have knowledge that a woman has preferred bad boys in the past, I won't give them much, if any, consideration. Link to post Share on other sites
kizik Posted March 13, 2009 Share Posted March 13, 2009 nice guys end up alone, as do nice girls. Sounds like a self-fulfilling prophecy to me. Don't resign yourself to a solitary life just because you're nice. If you think no one will want you b/c you're nice, that's also a really bleak view of humanity. Maybe you should just be yourself, like yourself, and forget anyone who doesn't like you. Link to post Share on other sites
Woggle Posted March 13, 2009 Share Posted March 13, 2009 Why don't nice guys and nice girls date each other and not worry about the dumb @sses and @ss holes of the world? Because nice girls still want the jerks and after being used and abused so many times they are not so nice anymore. They then take out all this rage on the nice guys. Nice guys often are the punching bags for women who have been screwed over one too many times for the jerks. Link to post Share on other sites
ERIC_H Posted March 13, 2009 Share Posted March 13, 2009 Unfortunatly Woggle is right. Us nice guys think we have found a girl we could be with, and we just turn out to be punching bags until they find another jerk. Link to post Share on other sites
Dexter Morgan Posted March 13, 2009 Share Posted March 13, 2009 Because nice girls still want the jerks and after being used and abused so many times they are not so nice anymore. They then take out all this rage on the nice guys. Nice guys often are the punching bags for women who have been screwed over one too many times for the jerks. thats why its all the more funny when you hear them crying about not being able to find a good guy. that is, the ones that go for the bad boys. Link to post Share on other sites
Woggle Posted March 13, 2009 Share Posted March 13, 2009 Unfortunatly Woggle is right. Us nice guys think we have found a girl we could be with, and we just turn out to be punching bags until they find another jerk. This is why men should never take the knight in shining armor approach to relationships. They just try to recreate the drama they had in the past relationship. Link to post Share on other sites
Touche Posted March 13, 2009 Share Posted March 13, 2009 This is why men should never take the knight in shining armor approach to relationships. They just try to recreate the drama they had in the past relationship. Well I'm sure glad my H stayed true to himself and remained the good guy he is. Link to post Share on other sites
MindoverMatter Posted March 13, 2009 Share Posted March 13, 2009 Woggle, you say: that there are guys who treat their girlfriends like crap and that in turn the girlfriends take the issues they aquiered through that treatment to their next relationship and treat their good boyfriends like crap as well. So your solution is that the good ones should treat their girlfriends like crap, too? Uhm. So how does that solve anything? Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted March 13, 2009 Share Posted March 13, 2009 I hope he's not saying that and perhaps I've read it wrong. My advice would be to *not take their crap*, as opposed to treating them like crap. Link to post Share on other sites
Woggle Posted March 14, 2009 Share Posted March 14, 2009 I hope he's not saying that and perhaps I've read it wrong. My advice would be to *not take their crap*, as opposed to treating them like crap. That is what I mean. A man should only involve himself with women who have their head screwed on straight and have their life in order. If she has been mistreated in the past and has done the work on herself to break the pattern of being drawn to those kind of men and realizes that not all men are like the jerks she used to be addicted to then fine but don't ever try to rescue a woman from an abuser or even a cheater. Link to post Share on other sites
stillafool Posted March 14, 2009 Share Posted March 14, 2009 Because nice girls still want the jerks and after being used and abused so many times they are not so nice anymore. They then take out all this rage on the nice guys. Nice guys often are the punching bags for women who have been screwed over one too many times for the jerks. That's funny because nice girls feel the same way about the nice guys. That the nice guys have been screwed over by the women they really wanted (the bad girl) but had to settle for a woman they found less attractive. I think it's funny when guys say women wait to get married until they find the "perfect" guy but end up being alone. The exact same thing can be said of men. They want the perfect mate also and usually take longer to want to marry than women. Why do you guys lie? Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted March 14, 2009 Share Posted March 14, 2009 From waiting a long time to get married I can say that perfection is overrated. I now prefer imperfection with a purpose and a goal and a loving demeanor Oh, also, I think it's fine to have crap (meaning issues and disagreements) but serve it up in a healthy manner. It's the how, not the what. We all have our big girl and boy undies on now I wonder if Wogs is not so much angry at women but rather disappointed in them, stemming from the hurt. I can say that disappointment is more my perspective than anger. I still respect and believe in them though Link to post Share on other sites
GoodOnPaper Posted March 14, 2009 Share Posted March 14, 2009 That's funny because nice girls feel the same way about the nice guys. That the nice guys have been screwed over by the women they really wanted (the bad girl) but had to settle for a woman they found less attractive. I'll buy this -- in my case, it happens to be an oversimplified but reasonably accurate description of how I ended up with my wife. But if we "nice guys" are doing this, how can we also be doing this? I think it's funny when guys say women wait to get married until they find the "perfect" guy but end up being alone. The exact same thing can be said of men. They want the perfect mate also and usually take longer to want to marry than women. Why do you guys lie? I'm not sure what we're lying about. I certainly wish I had waited -- basically, I was a late bloomer who didn't give myself the patience to bloom. I don't know about the "perfect" mate concept, but as I have gotten older, I've become more in tune with what qualities I am attracted to and how to look a little deeper for them. When we're young, we "nice guys" are particularly susceptible to adopting society's/media's definition of what is attractive and panicking if we or the women we manage to attract aren't in line with that. Link to post Share on other sites
Woggle Posted March 14, 2009 Share Posted March 14, 2009 Most men when they finally get over the woman that screwed them over are pretty much over them for good. I want no part whatsoever of my ex though that might have more to do with the fact that she is a psycho druggie who has aged 30 years in 3 years. When men are lucky enough to find one of the good ones we tend to really appreciate because we didn't think women like that existed anymore. Men don't feel the need to create drama just to spice things and we are not prone to ruin a good relationship because it is boring without all that drama. Of course there are exceptions on both sides but this is generally how it is these days. Link to post Share on other sites
You'reasian Posted March 14, 2009 Share Posted March 14, 2009 That's funny because nice girls feel the same way about the nice guys. That the nice guys have been screwed over by the women they really wanted (the bad girl) but had to settle for a woman they found less attractive. I think it's funny when guys say women wait to get married until they find the "perfect" guy but end up being alone. The exact same thing can be said of men. They want the perfect mate also and usually take longer to want to marry than women. Why do you guys lie? I'm neither a nice guy nor a player, just a guy that's looking for a girl - now when I went through a long period (years) of being a nice guy, I would persue nice girls - with not qualms, baggage or anything whatsoever and truth be told, I got *friendzoned* more often than not. Link to post Share on other sites
carhill Posted March 14, 2009 Share Posted March 14, 2009 Fear not, as you age, women appear to discover the value of strong, quiet, gentlemanly behavior. What's old is new again, or something like that Link to post Share on other sites
GoodOnPaper Posted March 15, 2009 Share Posted March 15, 2009 No sexual vibes. Both can be very guarded socially. The nice guy is trying not to appear too forward, so his approach is too subtle or nonexistant -- this translates to the nice girl as zero sex appeal. On the other side, the nice girl's signals can often be too subtle or nonexistant -- translating as lack of interest to the nice guy. Link to post Share on other sites
You'reasian Posted March 15, 2009 Share Posted March 15, 2009 No sexual vibes. Both can be very guarded socially. The nice guy is trying not to appear too forward, so his approach is too subtle or nonexistant -- this translates to the nice girl as zero sex appeal. On the other side, the nice girl's signals can often be too subtle or nonexistant -- translating as lack of interest to the nice guy. With women, perception is reality all the time, every time. They look at a guy giving off low sex vibes and pass.... Don't appreciate the quiet types. Link to post Share on other sites
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