I'm sick of being angry all the time, and I don't know what to think of him???

[Rollercoasterr]

If you think this thread is worthy of anger management, you should read her other one about the same subject. Seems she cut quite a bit of how she wanted to seriously hurt this girl out of this particular thread.

 

http://www.loveshack.org/forums/t182648/

 

 

Edit: Wait, wait. Before she sees this and decides to call me illiterate again, I must clarify that she has DREAMS about hurting this poor girl. But she still left quite a bit out, and I'm not even sure why she's reposting an almost identical thread when she's already been given answers and opinions.

[You'reasian]

I mean a difference in the culture is that people aren't direct down there, and I adjusted to that. I'm not direct to the point of being harsh, but if I hate someone, i will tell them to their face, "I hate you." I don't say "I love you" or make someone think I care about them, unless I mean it.

 

I've heard that he does that to nearly all his friends. He gets a girlfriend and then ignores them... I think he just keeps people hanging on just so he'll have someone to tide him over whenever he doesn't have a girlfriend.

 

I need to get over this but I am so mad. All my life, I've struggled with my temper and I have a bad one... thanks though for helping.

 

Are you still confused by his indirectness?

[Cora]

I just wanted to say I can understand and relate to how you feel. Whenever I found out my ex had a new girlfriend it just ate away at me constantly and it wasn't a good feeling at all. I became very very jealous to the point of every single one of my thoughts was consumed by the two of them. I always wondered what they were doing? Where they were going? How much time were they spending with each other? etc.. etc.. etc.. On and on and on a neverending thing. I would check each of their Myspace pages every single day.....sometimes up to 5 maybe 10 times a day. Look at all the new pics they had posted together and read all of the comments they sent to each other. I knew it wasn't healthy and I was going out of my mind with jealousy. I couldn't stop and I became addicted. I had nasty thoughts of her and thought it wasn't fair that she got to be there with him. That she was his new girlfriend now etc... I started to have dreams of her and the two of them together. It was bad...really bad. It hurt because she was the one he cheated on me with. Sometimes I just wanted to strangle her....I know not good thoughts.

 

But what I came to realize is it wasn't her at all who I should take my anger out on. It was him. He was the one that did this not her. It was sooo hard for me to finally realize that but the sooner I did the better I became. It was soo hard. I def understand though what you are going through and it sucks!! Just hang in there and try to focus on other things as much as you can. If you don't it will continue to eat away at you. In my opinion you are a wonderful person and deserve someone so much better....someone who will want you and ONLY you. Someone who is willing to wait for you no matter what. If they can't wait then they aren't worth it. Stay strong!!!

[Cora]

I also just wanted to add I understand how you feel about wondering if you will ever find someone? I feel that way as well. All my life I have been the back-up girl never the girlfriend. Never knew how it felt to be the only one in a guys heart. Always got walked all over and used. I would look at all the happy couples around me and wonder why couldn't that be me? When will it be my turn? Sometimes I think I'll be single for the rest of my life. I have lost all trust in guys. I sit and wonder what the hell is wrong with me? Yeah, it sucks!! But alot of it is my own fault for allowing guys to walk all over me like that. So hang in there hun....I know how you feel!!

[Girasole]

Thanks Cora. Thanks for listening to me... I hope things work out for you.

 

I can relate to what you're saying... like I said, I feel like an understudy for whoever is playing Eponine in Les Miserables... and some guy is always Marius.

 

Thanks for saying those nice things though... it means a lot. I'm sure you'll find someone. But you know, I've learned that you can't tolerate crap from people... I leanred that the hard way. But, sometimes that's the most effective way.

 

Good luck

[Island Girl]

I can relate to what you're saying... like I said, I feel like an understudy for whoever is playing Eponine in Les Miserables... and some guy is always Marius.

 

As long as you put your heart out there and give it freely to someone who doesn't deserve it -- that always will be the case.

 

But you know, I've learned that you can't tolerate crap from people...

 

Unfortunately it seems you haven't learned this lesson yet. Or if you have you choose not to apply it to your life.

 

This guy has treated you badly before -- discarding you when he is involved with someone and then picking up things when he wants to. And you have allowed him to.

 

He will continue to treat you the same way as long as you wait around and allow him to do it.

 

Move on.

 

And as far as meeting people after college -- it is not a problem. Plenty of people meet after they are out of college.

 

You seem really stuck. Really blindingly defensive. And stuck.

 

And just because people do not say what you want to hear doesn't mean the are The Big Bad Internet Attackers!

 

Give me a HUGE break. Really?

[Girasole]

And just because people do not say what you want to hear doesn't mean the are The Big Bad Internet Attackers!

 

No, maybe this has escaped your attention, but there's a difference between being honest and being hurtful. I can tell the difference.

 

Rollercoaster was just being an *******. This forum is for people who want to help, not make value judgements... maybe he doesn't know how to read.

[Rollercoasterr]

I am not being anything to you. You just can't handle the truth so you're being a whinebag.

 

And I'm a girl.

 

Why don't YOU learn how to read and stop trying to say that everyone is attacking you. Maybe if you'd actually read and take heart to what people say you wouldn't be defensive all the time. But you can bring a horse to water but you can't force it to drink. Which basically means that we can give you all the advice in the world but you're clearly not going to listen. You never do.

 

And you never answered my question from earlier. Can you tell me one time where I personally called you worthless? Because otherwise you're just making yourself out to be a huge drama queen. And I DID call you that. You're making something out of nothing. For some reason you're incredible irritable over a situation that you KNOW isn't going to work out. It shouldn't matter to you what some people say on the internet. YOU came here for advice. We didn't come looking for you. You've gotten you're advice and now you need to quite freaking out and talking crap about everyone who says something that YOU don't want to hear.

 

Are you sure you're 29? Cause you're acting like a teenager. I find it hard to believe that a grown woman would act this petty and angry over something so small. You've posted your question about this situation into two different threads. You've gotten just about the same advice every time. Now what are you expecting to accomplish here?