Bells Posted March 15, 2009 Posted March 15, 2009 ...being on the prowl...." This what was site.... I recently had been corresponding via the chat system on a site getting to know her, mid 40's, attractive blonde that had her own investment business (properties) I take it one of those independent women with a lucrative business. Anyhow, I asked her what she was looking for in a man. And she goes, "Well, actually I'm not looking. I enjoy being single because I like my privacy and my alone time" I go, "Oh....okay, so....um....why are you on this dating site?" And she says, "Why does life have to be so serious?" And I say, "What do you mean?" SHe says, "Can't a woman date without being on the prowl?" I thought this was a trick question actually. I instinctively wanted to say "Yes" Because if you ARE dating, aren't you on "the prowl"? Right? or am I wrong on this? But, instead I said, "Well, how about we go out on a date then?" And she said, "What do you have in mind?" And I said, "Well, probably <and I said what we could do" I asked for her number, and she gave it to me. This kind of shocked me, because I succeeded at getting her digits and she is ....well...interested. Because I've met a lot of online women that would pull the ol, "I'm not looking right now" even though their actions of BEING on an actuay "dating" site would contadict things, and , quite frankly, be a silly thing for her to say. So anyhow, can anyone figure out this woman's intentions based on her a ctions with me?
boxing123 Posted March 15, 2009 Posted March 15, 2009 She sounds like she has issues..But you could probably get some easy sex from her.
Author Bells Posted March 15, 2009 Author Posted March 15, 2009 She sounds like she has issues..But you could probably get some easy sex from her. LOL....1 out of 2 ain't bad, right? Go figure. Guess I'll have to play it by ear? Think she's one of those independent career minded women that is just wanting sex or more? She always talks about how she has no time to date, because she's always busy working. Cant' figure that out, because she kind of lives in a laid back rural area.
era Posted March 15, 2009 Posted March 15, 2009 Bells.... Could be because in her heart she knows that she does'nt need one more thing to make herself complete. She's very happy with her life. She sounds like a woman with healthy self-esteem...I'm betting you'll have a great date.
SpanksTheMonkey Posted March 15, 2009 Posted March 15, 2009 She always talks about how she has no time to date, because she's always busy working. Cant' figure that out, because she kind of lives in a laid back rural area. Maybe shes a sex addicted cow farmer! never know lol..
Author Bells Posted March 15, 2009 Author Posted March 15, 2009 Bells.... Could be because in her heart she knows that she does'nt need one more thing to make herself complete. She's very happy with her life. She sounds like a woman with healthy self-esteem...I'm betting you'll have a great date. Cool.....I never thought of it that way, but my initial thought was, well, she's saying one thing, but on a dating site....im confused. She's works in the horse farm business, and rides (impressive photos of her riding), not afraid to get her hands dirty obviously. But.....I hope I'm proven wrong.
boxing123 Posted March 15, 2009 Posted March 15, 2009 LOL....1 out of 2 ain't bad, right? Go figure. Guess I'll have to play it by ear? Think she's one of those independent career minded women that is just wanting sex or more? She always talks about how she has no time to date, because she's always busy working. Cant' figure that out, because she kind of lives in a laid back rural area. Then I would think she just wants sex..Kind of silly to be on a dating site , but saying ahead of time you do not even have time to date. She sounds pretty confused.
blondesmiler Posted March 15, 2009 Posted March 15, 2009 Bells.... Could be because in her heart she knows that she does'nt need one more thing to make herself complete. She's very happy with her life. She sounds like a woman with healthy self-esteem...I'm betting you'll have a great date. I agree............. Sounds like she would like to perhaps date someone, once a week, once a fortnight but doesn't have time to commit to a full on relationship and also has no need or desire for one at the moment, but would like some male company and sex.....sounds like a pretty healthy women to me.
Author Bells Posted March 15, 2009 Author Posted March 15, 2009 I agree............. Sounds like she would like to perhaps date someone, once a week, once a fortnight but doesn't have time to commit to a full on relationship and also has no need or desire for one at the moment, but would like some male company and sex.....sounds like a pretty healthy women to me. It sounds good, in theory, however, if I start having sex with a woman, chances are I am going to want to see her more frequently because (and this is unsual for a man) would probably want to see her more....typically, my thing is this......if I'm sleeping with a woman, I consider us a couple. There is a bond there. I guess I lose "Man Points" for being sensitive.lol Anyhow, I did forget to mention that she does like to base the foundations of a relationship based of a friendship first scenario....so that might dup the "She just wants sex" theory. I did agree with her there, because I'm not into this whole "love at first sight" thing. I apologize for not mentioning that earlier.
boxing123 Posted March 15, 2009 Posted March 15, 2009 Blonde, this is the problem... What would men do in this situation? Straight up say they just want sex, or get a hooker. What do women do? Say they want to "date", but don't have time to "date", and don't want "just sex". It is like you have to decipher code. Say they want to be "friends first" darn well knowing they have ZERO time or energy for you. And Bells, exactly...How does one start having sex with a woman, and then see her once every 2 weeks? How is her situation normal and healthy? I do not feel it is. How do you have time to "develop a friendship" with a woman whom has no time, lol. I would pass this one by.
Author Bells Posted March 15, 2009 Author Posted March 15, 2009 Blonde, this is the problem... What would men do in this situation? Straight up say they just want sex, or get a hooker. What do women do? Say they want to "date", but don't have time to "date", and don't want "just sex". It is like you have to decipher code. Say they want to be "friends first" darn well knowing they have ZERO time or energy for you. And Bells, exactly...How does one start having sex with a woman, and then see her once every 2 weeks? How is her situation normal and healthy? I do not feel it is. How do you have time to "develop a friendship" with a woman whom has no time, lol. I would pass this one by. well, I did get her digits....lol...guess that's the step in the right direction?
boxing123 Posted March 15, 2009 Posted March 15, 2009 I guess.. But what does she have to offer? Best case scenario... She squeezes you in, she likes you, has sex with you. Then no time for you.
BobSacamento Posted March 15, 2009 Posted March 15, 2009 It sounds like she wants to go out and have a good time. Don't over think this one. ...but if I was to over think it...I would say a woman avoiding the subject of commitment is either a serial dater or very clever. She knows commitment is what most men fear the most.
carhill Posted March 15, 2009 Posted March 15, 2009 IDK, with all those horses around, I think she's playing you Seriously, what's the downside? Just go out with her one time. Remember, no matter how successful and "independent" a woman is, she's still a woman. The same chemical factory. You know what to do
Kamille Posted March 15, 2009 Posted March 15, 2009 I date without being on the prowl. Throughout my twenties I got sucked into one relationship after the other because I thought that's what I wanted. Now, finding a relationship is no longer the center of my life. I have more balance, I'm happier and if someone comes along who steals my heart, great. In the meantime, I still enjoy meeting men (I adore men), going out with them, the casual banter. As Carhill puts it: the same chemical factory. I'm attracted to men, so of course I want to date them. This doesn't mean, however, that I'm out looking for casual sex. The frame of mind isn't "I'm not looking for a relationship therefore I want casual sex". I usually need to feel some kind of emotional connection before I want to get naked around a guy. Few guys pass that test immediately, which doesn't rule out that it might develop as we get to know each other better. But like you, if I sleep with someone, it usually means emotions are involved and that we are in a somewhat commited relationship. Usually, when this happens, it happens because I choose to be with this person, because this person makes sense in my life. Not because my goal is landing a man for marriage.
yeex Posted March 15, 2009 Posted March 15, 2009 Anyhow, I asked her what she was looking for in a man.? Personally I think this is kind of a weird question to ask somebody you have not even been on a first date yet and you are overanalyzing the whole thing. If you see an initial attraction and she accepts the date, why not just meet up and have fun with no huge expectations and see what develops. If the date goes well and you go on a couple of others, then ask things like what she is looking for in a man. That is just me though.
Author Bells Posted March 15, 2009 Author Posted March 15, 2009 Personally I think this is kind of a weird question to ask somebody you have not even been on a first date yet and you are overanalyzing the whole thing. If you see an initial attraction and she accepts the date, why not just meet up and have fun with no huge expectations and see what develops. If the date goes well and you go on a couple of others, then ask things like what she is looking for in a man. That is just me though. It's not a wierd question, it's a valid question. Not sure how thought it was wierd, never heard of people thinking, "What are you looking for in a man." Besides dating profiles always have that in "What you're l ooking for" on it anyways, it's the norm.
yeex Posted March 15, 2009 Posted March 15, 2009 ok that is cool. I just think that is kind of a heavy question to ask a woman directly at first and some may be put on the spot by it and give you flakey answers. I just try to keep it light and fun at first and see what develops and then start asking those questions after a couple of dates if there is potential.
boxing123 Posted March 15, 2009 Posted March 15, 2009 I think there are plenty of women whom WILL prioritize a man, and a relationship. Obviously you would prioritize her as well. So why should you settle for some lady who tells you upfront she is far too busy?
yeex Posted March 15, 2009 Posted March 15, 2009 l. So why should you settle for some lady who tells you upfront she is far too busy? He has not even been on a date with her yet.
Cherished Posted March 15, 2009 Posted March 15, 2009 She was basically stating that she wasn't into you in a nice way when she stated she wasn't "dating." She was stating in a nice way that she didn't want to date YOU, be it whether she didn't find your photo attractive, thought your intense and pointed questioning was a bit psychoish, whatever, that's what she was saying, dude. Then you've got the semantics going on. For me, being "on the prowl" just means that you're on the dating scene, doesn't necessarily mean that you'll eff anything that walks. It can be just a humorous way to say "dating" but not seeing anyone seriously. I think you really need to chill, Boxing.
Cherished Posted March 15, 2009 Posted March 15, 2009 I think there are plenty of women whom WILL prioritize a man, and a relationship. Obviously you would prioritize her as well. So why should you settle for some lady who tells you upfront she is far too busy? Again...anyone who tells you they are too "busy" are not into you. She didn't want to go out with you.
confused_2008 Posted March 15, 2009 Posted March 15, 2009 I think you really need to chill, Boxing. I think you really need to read the thread before you make such quick judgements. He's not even the OP.
carhill Posted March 15, 2009 Posted March 15, 2009 With all the multiple handles and personalities on this forum, it's sometimes hard to know who is who
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